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Church going MoMS

Toni828Toni828 member
in Multiples
Just wondering what others do.  I'm a first time mom of twins and I feel like I have so many questions.  I was totally involved in my church before the babies came.  Now I go but it's not the same, I'm not as involved as I once was and I get that my life has changed with the twins, so I don't expect things to be like they were before.  I used to go Sunday AM and Wed PM but now it's only Sundays and I am usually late. I really want to get back to my regular attendance but the boys nap in the morning is making me late and then on Wed. they are in bed and asleep by 7-7:30.  Of course I am wiped out too.  I hate to disrupt their sleep, but would it be awful if I did and took them to church on Wed. and woke them early on Sun so I can be there on time?
My husband serves in kids church so he has to leave an hour early and I am usually on my own for getting out the door on Sundays. 
These guys are on such a good schedule that I guess I'm afraid if I do something different it will mess them all up and things will be harder on me later if you know what I mean.
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Re: Church going MoMS

  • mirnbmirnb member
    This was a struggle for us too....we really just couldn't make it work a lot of the time in the first year......once they get a bit older and can skip  a morning nap here and there it makes it easier......you just do the best you can and cut out what you can't....I stepped back from some things I was volunteering in so I could be home at night and we just made Sunday mornings the priority....its not easy but only for a season!
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  • ks3pinkks3pink member
    We miss church a lot. During the winter I didn't want to get them out in the cold and now their morning nap sometimes interferes. I do my best not to mess with nap times so if they don't wake up we just don't make it. I do see it getting better soon but as for now it is what it is. I do make sure DD gets there Sunday morning and Wednesday night but the rest of us are hit or miss right now.
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  • Dragonfly1226Dragonfly1226 member
    For now we let the girls sleep during church if it is nap time. They are so little so it doesn't matter yet. With DS when he started on a schedule we actually went to Saturday night mass for a while. At our church it is at 5:00pm. It is much easier to make on time and doesn't conflict with naps. We will probably do the same when the girls are on a three or two nap schedule. Once they drop to one nap a day Sunday mornings become a lot easier.
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  • Toni828Toni828 member
    OK - it's good to know that I am not alone.  I think about all my friends with singletons and they just seem to continue with their normal life.  I don't know if they even put their babies on a schedule.  It doesn't seem like it to me.  With twins, I feel like I have to have them on a schedule to give myself some sanity. I guess this is my "new normal" for a while. 
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  • raraavis28raraavis28 member
    It's definitely not the same with twins! I'm lucky that my church has two different Mass times on Sunday, so we go to the one that doesn't interfere with the twins' naptime. Also, my parents live nearby so DH and I almost always have at least one extra set of hands to help pass babies. Going to church as a family is stressful, though, b/c they're at an age where they not only don't sleep, but they're squirmy and more often than not need to be walked in the back for at least part of Mass. I was also very involved before LOs were born, in the choir and as a cantor. The choir is "off" over the summer, but I don't know what I'm gonna do when they start up again. I so love to sing and want to be part of the choir, but I don't want to impose on my parents and DH to do all the baby-wrangling in the pews. Maybe DH and I will have to go back to splitting up and going to different Masses until they're old enough to sit through it....or I'll just give up choir for awhile. I dunno, but I do know that this stage will pass....
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  • LucyRicardo3LucyRicardo3 member
    sing4mysavior said:
    We also had a rough go with church the first year, and like you, felt a little lost. Agreed--when they moved to one nap, it became a LOT easier. We still don't participate much in evening activities right now, but it's just for a short time in our lives. I don't have any magic tricks to offer you, but it does get easier.
    This is where we are, too.
    When they got about a year old, I was able to ease back in to Wed PM, but that's when we have small groups and kids AWANA, so there is a nursery for the twins. They usually fall asleep on the way home and I change them and put them straight to bed. (I have even brought them to Wed PM already in their pj's, lol)

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  • Toni828Toni828 member
    looks like this is just a small sacrifice to make for all the years of praying for my children! 1year is not too far off, and we have the rest of their lives to get involved again. Thanks for all the feedback ladies.  Now I know I'm not alone and this is totally normal.
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  • mamatotwins0812mamatotwins0812 member
    Toni828 said:
    OK - it's good to know that I am not alone.  I think about all my friends with singletons and they just seem to continue with their normal life.  I don't know if they even put their babies on a schedule.  It doesn't seem like it to me.  With twins, I feel like I have to have them on a schedule to give myself some sanity. I guess this is my "new normal" for a while. 

    Ditto all of what you said. And I'm so glad you posted this bc I've been struggling with this big time since they were born. It was a very rare occasion that we would miss and now we are lucky to get there once a month and it leaves me feeling empty. Our church only offers service on Sunday and there's 3 times, but all interfere with sleep/morning nap. We JUST started being able to figure out how to get out for the very first service (we still cut it close and/or are late, but we make it), however this past week they slept late and I'm in the mindset of keeping them on schedule like you said and not interrupting sleep. With 2, it's my only means for survival. So I went alone to the 2nd service, which is far from ideal but that's what we chose to do for this week. We kind of take it week by week. So in short, I can say that it does get somewhat easier, but we do still struggle. Just do the best that you can, God will understand :).
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  • Mama-BearMama-Bear member
    When ours were about the same age as yours they woke in time for church and would sometimes nap there, I hated waking them when it was time to leave but it didn't make their routine horrible.  We didn't do Wednesday nights then.  We have Wednesday Awana now that doesn't get over until 8:00 (bedtime was always 7:00-7:30, now it's 8:00) and they just went to bed late on those nights, but our twins were 1.5-2.5 at that point.  Now they're 3.5 and they'll be participating in Awana (and did last year).  Heck, I understand bedtimes, DS1 just started K and I hate when he goes to bed late, but they all enjoy church (at this age) and I think it's important for them to go. 

    Cut yourself some slack, this is temporary.  If you miss church every week for a year, it's still temporary.  I always had DH to help get them ready (or do most of it for me while I got ready), I'm sure people understand.  Can you listen to the sermon online?  We go to a very large church (6,000 members) and the previous week's sermon plays on the radio on Sunday mornings, you can buy a CD of it, or download a podcast. 

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  • macchiattomacchiatto member
    My husband's a pastor so I've always been on my own on Sunday mornings. It definitely makes things more challenging!
    When they were infants our mornings services were at 9 and 10:45 a.m. They usually napped from 9-11 but I would put them down a little before 9, wake them up at 10ish, quickly get them changed and then head to the 10:45 service. It worked pretty well since they still got a nap in at the normal time; just a bit shorter. I didn't want to mess up their schedule too much, even though it meant I was less involved for a while than I wanted to be.
    There was also a weekday morning women's Bible study I was eventually able to join and that helped, too, and by this point I'm also able to do things like lead a Bible study, join the praise choir, etc.
    fraternal twin boys born january 2009
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