April 2013 Moms

4 month sleep regression - question

I know lot of people are going through this or have gone through it.  My question is do they come out of this stage on their own?

I have read up about it and how their sleep patterns are changing, etc.  But I am not clear if you need to train/teach them to sleep (for more than an hour at a time) again or if they naturally just work it out and will go back to sleeping for longer stretches when this stage is over?

Hope that question makes sense, my brain is not working on 2 weeks now of being up every hour or so.
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Re: 4 month sleep regression - question

  • We had to do a little bit of sleep training with him. He still doesn't sleep in as late as he used to, but at least he sleeps for 9-10 hours through the night. I know I'll get heat from some moms for this but our Doctor recommended to us to let him fuss when he wakes early in the middle of the night. We knew he wasn't hungry... He would fall asleep after only 1 oz. He also said that they will wake up in their lighter stages of sleep and either fight going back to bed or not know how to fall back to sleep on their own. This made sense for us since LO is such a horrible sleep fighter. It took about 3 nights. First night he woke up 2 times before 3am 20 minutes of crying the first wake up (felt like an hour) around 5 min of crying the 2nd wake up. He woke up again around 4 and fed him this time. We have a video monitor so I am able to see that he is okay. Second and third nights were similar only the longest he ever cried was 10 minutes. Now almost a month later we will feed him a small bottle if he wakes after 3:30 am, otherwise if he wakes up before then (rare) he will only cry for about 3 minutes or less. Also, I should probably say that I can totally tell his tummy ache cry and if I hear this I will get up with him regardless of the time. Obviously, it's not the best choice for everyone, but for our little sleep fighter and us it was right. It has worked like a charm and he (and mom and dad) wakes up much happier.
    "As soon as I saw you I knew an adventure was going to happen." ~Winnie the Pooh
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  • Thanks, wow 9 hours that would be heaven.  before this "stage" started he was very consistent that he slept 4 - 5 hours for the first stretch (8pm to 12:30am) and then woke every 3 hours to eat but would go right back to sleep until 7am.  This was all sleeping in his RnP next to my bed.

    Now he has regressed to not sleeping for more than 1 hour at a time even in the early night.  Fussing like crazy when I put him back in his RnP, and being AWAKE (like wanting to get up for the day) between 4am and 5am.

    Does this sound like the 4 month sleep regression? he will not be 4 months until next week and this started about two weeks ago.
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  • When LO has started waking up at 3-4AM as opposed to 6:30 am like he had been, we let him figure it out for a few mins.  He's not really "crying", more just whimpering.  If he starts to really cry, or we hear him up for more then 5-10 mins. we'll go in and pat his tummy, give a pacifier, etc but dont pick him up.  So it is kind of sleep training. We help him fall back asleep  but do nothing to indicate its play time or meal time.  Its been working for us, he's only waking up now 1-2x per week at that time  


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  • CoachAP... Ill try that.  I have been doing that a little, rubbing his stomach, not picking him up, but I usually cave after a few minutes when he really starts to cry.  I need to toughen up!

    I got up last night to pee when he was really gaining steam from fussing to crying, and by the time I came back he had fallen asleep... of course he then woke up again 10 minutes later, but it was nice while it lasted.
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  • NandaB said:
    It is normal for infants to be hungry in the middle of the night. N is sleeping from 8ish until 4 or 5 and then eating and going back to sleep, but my son woke up multiple times a night at this age. I can't imagine choosing to let a 3 or 4 month old cry it out. That kinda breaks my heart a little, and we did sleep training @ 9 months with G. They're just so little! OP yes, they usually sort it out on their own. Good luck!
    I expect him to wake up to eat, I was perfectly happy with his old schedule of eating 3 times at night.  Waking up every hour just because... not so much!
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  • We had 2.5 weeks of wakeful hell, then it went away, like turning off a light switch. It suuuuucked but now he is back to normal not-rabies baby
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  • My DS was sleeping in his RnP and swing up until a week ago. He would sleep 9-5 and after a feed, 5:30-8:00.
    We transitioned him to his crib 1 week ago. Now he goes goes to sleep between 7-8 and is up for feedings at 12, 2, 4, and finally up at 7 for the day. It's so frustrating getting up every so often but I know that this, too, shall pass. Just remember that when you're up at the wee hours of the night/morning, there are probably a million other people doing the same exact thing. You aren't alone! Hang in there.
  • arschm02arschm02 member
    edited August 2013
    For those of you who think I'm a "bad parent" for letting him fuss w/o going to him. I assure you that his cries are not even for comfort. He fights sleep. He cries harder when I try to rock him back to sleep. He has done this since webrought him home. Picking him up trying to "comfort" him when he is like this is for me, not him. Every child is different and that does not make me a bad parent!
    "As soon as I saw you I knew an adventure was going to happen." ~Winnie the Pooh
  • I'm sticking it out and helping M sort it out. We've been up every two hours for the last few weeks-he seems pretty hungry. But like @Nandab said-he's a baby, is crying, and needs us for something so I'm getting up to help (even if, when I lift him 2" off the pnp mat he's fallen dead asleep again)
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  • NandaB said:
    For those of you who think I'm a "bad parent" for letting him fuss w/o going to him. I assure you that his cries are not even for comfort. He fights sleep. He cries harder when I try to rock him back to sleep. He has done this since webrought him home. Picking him up trying to "comfort" him when he is like this is for me, not him. Every child is different and that does not make me a bad parent!
    I assume you mean me, but I didn't say you were a bad parent. I said I couldn't imagine letting a 3 or 4 month old cry it out, and that my heart breaks a little for him. Different. You just keep rockin on with your big bad letting your baby cry self.

    arschm02 Im sure most of the empathetic, understanding mothers in this forum can understand that you are doing what's best for you and your baby which may not necessarily be everyone's path, but no one else's position to judge. interesting that these forums are supposed to be about helping one another and still you get negative comments from people. As mothers we cop a lot of criticism from other mothers which is so frustrating, these mothers should show compassion as they would expect from each of us. we are all doing a wonderful job, whatever path we take to help our child is our own and each has it's merits.
  • Thank you @JessKate112. This is exactly what I needed to hear. I actually cried just now reading what you wrote. I truly enjoy being on these news feeds and I love that I can relate to other moms but I went to bed last night feeling so depressed and questioning everything I do for my baby. I truly felt like a bad mom. Why? It wasn't from anything my child was doing. He's the one who makes me feel I am doing things right. It was from other moms bullying thinking they have all the right answers even though they know nothing about my child. I hope the bullying stops or the babies will turn in to them too. I truly appreciate your compassion and am happy you reminded me of this! Your baby is lucky to have a mom like you.
    "As soon as I saw you I knew an adventure was going to happen." ~Winnie the Pooh
  • @nandab-he used to cluster feed like crazy at night...attached to the boob for a couple of hours. Now, though, he clamps his lips shut if he's not hungry. He nurses for a while, effectively swallowing for about half an hour. Not sure how to make him nurse if he's not hungry :)
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  • We hit the 4 month growth spurt this week. She's starving at night and waking up at 4am to eat instead of 6. It sucks and I am tired, but it is only once a night and she will outgrow it soon.
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