October 2013 Moms

Perfectly content with not DTD

Me nor my BF have any desire to even attempt DTD. we tried once since BFP which was just a total fail. I was talking to friend over the weekend who said she constantly wanted to jump her Fiance's bones while pregnant. I guess I just totally skipped that part of pregnancy. please tell me I'm not the only one....

Re: Perfectly content with not DTD

  • Yeah, I have no desire to DTD either, and DH is too nervous he's going to hurt me/baby, so... we're pretty boring lately, lol.
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  • What made it fail?  
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  • i would like to DTD, but my lady bits are so swollen that it hurts too much at this point, so I'm sticking with taking care of business myself, and so is DH.  Sad. 
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  • MangoMama82MangoMama82 member
    edited August 2013
    No desire here. At all. I will probably just do it a few times before I give birth so he doesn't go forever plus 6 weeks before he gets some

    Edited for spelling. Mobile bumping.
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  • pmarie33 said:

    What made it fail?  
    what made it fail was his (typical) fear of hurting the baby. along with me feeling self conscious. The other day he says " Hey want to try sex".... ummm no especially when you say it like that
  • What made it fail?  
    what made it fail was his (typical) fear of hurting the baby. along with me feeling self conscious. The other day he says " Hey want to try sex".... ummm no especially when you say it like that
    LOL my husband says the same thing sometimes, and it weirds me out so much.
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  • skyla13 said:



    What made it fail?  
    what made it fail was his (typical) fear of hurting the baby. along with me feeling self conscious. The other day he says " Hey want to try sex".... ummm no especially when you say it like that

    LOL my husband says the same thing sometimes, and it weirds me out so much.

    Glad I'm not the only one whose S/O is a creep LOL! He really makes things so much more awkward than they need to be
  • What made it fail?  
    what made it fail was his (typical) fear of hurting the baby. along with me feeling self conscious. The other day he says " Hey want to try sex".... ummm no especially when you say it like that
    LOL my husband says the same thing sometimes, and it weirds me out so much.
    Glad I'm not the only one whose S/O is a creep LOL! He really makes things so much more awkward than they need to be
    lol@ hey want to try sex comment. Men!

    I've noticed that guys are usually one way or another... either they're creeped out by the baby being in there or they don't mind it at all. A lot of women claim to get a hormonal boost in libido 1st and 2nd tri, but by 3rd it usually fails. It's tough when you look in the mirror and feel like a house. So, you're not the only one. I feel for you that you've only tried once in the entire 7-8 months, but once again, it's hard to get into it. It can be uncomfortable. Also on a personal note the second I lay down I get repeatedly kicked in the ribs. That's different though if that's distracting.. I'm the one carrying the baby, not DH! 

    Remember, there's always BJs for him and deep tissue massages for you, if you'd like to avoid sex but still remain intimate. Good luck!
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  • skyla13 said:



    What made it fail?  
    what made it fail was his (typical) fear of hurting the baby. along with me feeling self conscious. The other day he says " Hey want to try sex".... ummm no especially when you say it like that

    LOL my husband says the same thing sometimes, and it weirds me out so much.

    Glad I'm not the only one whose S/O is a creep LOL! He really makes things so much more awkward than they need to be


    My husband says "you wanna get close" haha! It's been way too long for us, I haven't had ANY drive either. Ugg

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  • I"m in the same boat.  First trimester was complications so I was fearful.  2nd trimester the mood returned but I was still fearful.  Now, I just feel unattractive.  Although DH seems to find me really attractive.  Which is very sweet.


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  • I wish I could feel content without. We've got a big dry spell coming up. He's got back surgery tomorrow with a six week recovery period, and then baby will be here soon after that and we'll have another six weeks.
  • I have no interest but once I wasn't officially on pelvic rest anymore I figured I'd give it a try so DH wouldn't be going without for months on end.  We tried it once and it was really uncomfortable for me so I'm hoping to avoid again until after the baby is born (and my lady bits are recovered).

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  • My bf believes pregnant women to be super horny.  I don't know where he gets his information from.  Maybe in the first 2 trimesters but things are different now.  It's also a little weird to be DTD and the baby is moving.  Also, our stomachs touch now but mine isn't squishy like his.
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  • I have lost all desire the entire pregnancy. I make myself do it for H's sake! Poor thing!
  • I'm apparently missing all of his cues, too. This morning he told me that yesterday he tried three times. Aside from poking me late last night as I was trying to fall asleep, I missed the others.
  • I'm apparently missing all of his cues, too. This morning he told me that yesterday he tried three times. Aside from poking me late last night as I was trying to fall asleep, I have no idea what he was talking about.
  • alfan004 said:

    My husband works nights and sleeps during the day. This morning when I went in the bedroom to get something, he woke up and said "Hey honey, I wanna do you later." Then proceeded to fall back asleep. I never thought married life could be so romantic.....

    Hahaha this is so my husband! I've been feeling pretty good and so we have been "busy" the past two weeks or so. I didn't have this when I was pregnant with dd so I'm enjoying it now!
  • I have lost all desire the entire pregnancy. I make myself do it for H's sake! Poor thing!

    Same here. Once a week is about all I manage, twice on rare weeks. It's just really uncomfortable.

    R&K married 4.15.11. TTC #1 since 7.11.12

    BFP #1 9.9.12 EDD 5.21.13 c/p 9.12.12 at 4 weeks 1 day

    BFP #2 10.15.12 EDD 6.28.13 c/p 10.19.12 at  4 weeks.

    BFP #3 1.19.13 EDD 10.1.13 Eleanor born 10.7.13 at 40 weeks 6 days

    13dpo hcg@32, progesterone@13.7, 15dpo hcg@110, 16dpo progesterone@25.9



    My blog:Urban Times in Michigan ~ My Bfp Chart
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  • I wish I had lost desire. I want to jump DH all the time. Oh wait, that's normal for me... ok, so nothing has changed. *sighs*  He is to scared because my belly is larger and because I ache all day. He is afraid something will happen and I will go into labor.
    DS1 - 6/07
    DS2 - 8/08
    DS3- 9/09
    DD1 - 11/11
    DD2 - 10/13
    DD3 - Csection Scheduled November 29th
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  • My bf believes pregnant women to be super horny.  I don't know where he gets his information from.  Maybe in the first 2 trimesters but things are different now.  It's also a little weird to be DTD and the baby is moving.  Also, our stomachs touch now but mine isn't squishy like his.
    OMG... This reminds me. TMI alert 
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    After DTD yesterday I had to laugh/be super grossed out/ embarrassed when I looked down and my belly was resting on him. EWWWWWWWW WTF is wrong with me!
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  • Both pregnancies have meant BFP = almost instant no sex drive or desire at all for either of us.

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  •  I've never been so in amazed by my body and disgusted by it simultaneously. 
    Haha.  Quote of the day goes to @Emilyusc211
     
    We still do it because for some reason DH still thinks I'm gorgeous and because I love him more than anything and enjoy that time together with him.  
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  • MH looooooves pregnant sex. I was ok with this in the 2nd tri, but now its just so awkward and uncomfortable for me. I occasionally give in bc I know it's important for him, but its hard to enjoy when all I can focus on is making myself comfortable.

    I gotta say though, for those who totally quit having sex after the BFP?! This just blows my mind. It's a fact that sex won't hurt the baby so I guess I just don't understand.
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  • Mae208 said:
    MH looooooves pregnant sex. I was ok with this in the 2nd tri, but now its just so awkward and uncomfortable for me. I occasionally give in bc I know it's important for him, but its hard to enjoy when all I can focus on is making myself comfortable. I gotta say though, for those who totally quit having sex after the BFP?! This just blows my mind. It's a fact that sex won't hurt the baby so I guess I just don't understand.
    Its not a matter of hurting the baby.  Its just having no want/need/desire for sex.

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  • Mae208 said:

    MH looooooves pregnant sex. I was ok with this in the 2nd tri, but now its just so awkward and uncomfortable for me. I occasionally give in bc I know it's important for him, but its hard to enjoy when all I can focus on is making myself comfortable.

    I gotta say though, for those who totally quit having sex after the BFP?! This just blows my mind. It's a fact that sex won't hurt the baby so I guess I just don't understand.

    Its not a matter of hurting the baby.  Its just having no want/need/desire for sex.


    Yeah, I was referring to the OP who said their one and only time was a total fail due to fear of hurting the baby.
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  • We finally got the green light from the doctor to get back to business, so yeah.  Green light means go.  I have a very happy husband!  (Not to mention a much happier me.)
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  • Mae208 said:


    Mae208 said:

    MH looooooves pregnant sex. I was ok with this in the 2nd tri, but now its just so awkward and uncomfortable for me. I occasionally give in bc I know it's important for him, but its hard to enjoy when all I can focus on is making myself comfortable.

    I gotta say though, for those who totally quit having sex after the BFP?! This just blows my mind. It's a fact that sex won't hurt the baby so I guess I just don't understand.

    Its not a matter of hurting the baby.  Its just having no want/need/desire for sex.
    Yeah, I was referring to the OP who said their one and only time was a total fail due to fear of hurting the baby.

    It wasn't me who had the fear of hurting the baby it was my boyfriend (a fear that I hear is very typical) I clarified this in a later post. sex was uncomfortable and awkward with a big belly in the way. Now that I'm pregnant I have no desire... we tried, it sucked, we lived and I'm sure things will go back to normal after baby gets here
  • I have had an insane sex drive and have been cut off in the third tri. I get that it's awkward due to my belly being so big and all, but damn him and his illogical fears. I asked him this wknd if we were ever going to have sex again, and he said ' not unless you want to get pregnant again'
    wtf?? I told him I will stop everything if he cuts me off permanently.


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  • We didn't during the first tri due to pgal fears.  But in second we realized we had to get past those.  Since then we are like teenagers.  Yes I'm uncomfortable, I'm huge, I'm disgusting, but according to DH I'm a goddess that makes him crazy with desire. lol  Actually when I'm really sore and uncomfortable a good O helps me relax.



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    9/13/12 BFP 9/25/12 M/C at 6.5 weeks

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  • my H is one of the dumb ones that thinks it'll disturb the baby, and he said he would get all freaked out if he could see the baby moving around... I told him to go from behind that way he couldn't see anything! That actually worked, until we actually attempted a little something and he couldn't get it up... ugh wtf!!!!!!!
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  • I have had no desire this entire pregnancy.  And when we try it is so uncomfortable I just don't feel like it.  Plus my DH just keeps making dumb comments about how I don't want to have sex that it just pisses me off.
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