SK's are making me insane today.

KendraL86 · August 2013

I'm hormonal and the SK's are making me insane today. I love them, but I need some space. End of rant.

twister22 · August 2013

I'm sorry it's a rough day! Personally, I would have a time limit on how much television can be watched per day.

Or something like this:

KendraL86 · August 2013

That's awesome Twister. DH and I have considered doing that. The problem is we have a home office with an entire network set up. If we change the password, we have to have our phones reconfigured and printer reconfigured (which requires we make service calls to the company)

hopanka · August 2013

You sound really ignorant, OP. Your 18 year old SD watches Nickelodean because her emotional maturity is likely 2/3 of her chronological age, as it is typical for kids with ASD's. And as someone with ASD, she may be drawn to electronics much more intensly than a typically developing teen. Have you ever heard of Temple Grandin? Even she had admitted that she STILL cannot allow herself to have a computer at home, now in her mature age, because it is just too strong of an urge. So - drastically intervening without any sort of a plan and prior discussion with her tx team would be stupid; and you saying (in a condesending way, what it seems like) that her screaming and crying wouldn't be a big deal - is also an ignorant assumption on your part. You are setting her up for failure because you don't know a thing about it. So, while it is "annoying" to you, you either follow a proper tx plan (maybe through positive reinforcement) or butt out.

I'm also side-eyeing anyone who could be SK's older sister...,but they're trashing BM's parenting...LOL. Aren't you like 27?

KendraL86 · August 2013

The comment about my age is irrelevant and a cheap shot. It undermines the integrity of your comment. For what it's worth, it's biologically impossible for me to be my stepdaughters sister. DH and BM had children very very young.

Littlejen22 · August 2013

You think an 18yo with ASD screaming and crying is no big deal?

And why did you only delete part?

SimpleJane · August 2013

Was the rest of the OP DD'd? I swear I read it all earlier.

KendraL86 · August 2013

I deleted it because I felt it was being misinterpreted and I have no desire to start any drama on this board. Perhaps I didn't state myself clearly enough and that is why it was misinterpreted. It was my fault for being too hormonal to edit and proofread. I love my step kids. I would never want to cause either of them any heartache or pain (obviously). I want them to have a great life and work hard to make that happen.

Yes, I have an 18 yo highly functioning autistic SD, and some of her unique quirks drive me up the wall at times, but I do love her. And I cherish all the wonder qualities that she has (for example, she is the most kind and sensitive person I have ever met. She will do anything for anyone). It does not mean, however, that some of her behavior does not make me insane at times. It does. And when it does, I excuse myself so that my frustration is not evident to her. She shouldn't feel bad for something she cannot control independently. But that doesn't mean I do not need space to cope, too.

We've met with many ASD specialists in the past two years so that we can appropriately address her behavioral issues and work with her in a way that will best enable growth and, eventually, independent living. She's made a TON of progress in the past two years, but, sometimes it's too much. And yes, sometimes she does cry and scream. It's part of the process because she can't understand things right away. The fits often last for about two minutes and when you explain the situation to her, it stops. It's just her initial gut reaction to not getting her way, not understanding the situation, and not being able to process change. Once things are explained, she understands and calms down and can be redirected to a more productive activities. For example, she has outbursts because she isn't allowed to use the internet (or any electronic communication device) unsupervised, but when the police call because she she is "stalking" people online, it just isnt' feasible. We do what we can, but sometimes, you have to just take the things away and redirect her to something more productive.

hopanka · August 2013

What's impossible about it? She is 18 and you're 27....me and my brother are also 9 years apart.

And yes, dear, the age is important. Your OP (the one you deleted), sounded so immature, that it totally made it relevant that you are only 9 or so years older than your SD. You can back-paddle all you want, and for what it's worth - I am happy that you at least partially "get it" in your subsequent reply, but I do remember what you wrote and I responded to it because it sounded ignorant. And you can't blame pregnancy hormones on that.

I'm glad the girl is getting proper therapy. While I do understand we all need an outlet (I am a full time mom to an 8 year old high functioning ASD boy myself), I have never "vented" about him or his quirks like you did. And I do live with him every single day, so sometimes I get tired.

Maybe you can learn a thing or two from your SD, because - as you stated, she is "the most sensitive and kind person". I can say the same about my boy.

Good luck!

Littlejen22 · August 2013

General statement since I did not see the deleted part. But when you are in your 20s it is easy to be defensive especially when you are helping to raise an older child.

Want a personalized experience?

SK's are making me insane today.

Re: SK's are making me insane today.

Choose Another Board

Search Boards