Kindness

partridgeb06 · August 2013

Why are there so many people who feel entitled to call people out and belittle others in this group? It is really sad, especially when there is no reason for it. We are all here because we are growing a life inside of us, let's embrace our similarities and differences and pratice the golden rule. Aka, just be nice

Much love mamas. I wish everyone the best over the next 9 months and beyond! (Haha, Toy Story is on TV right now)

thumper11 · August 2013

I legitimately apologized. We're all adults and make mistakes, I owned up to mine. I would never want to belittle anyone, believe me. I'm sorry it hit so hard with you, sincerely.

amhah09 · August 2013

Yeah I think I need to come back to this group when everyone's hormones calm back down. It makes me mean.

partridgeb06 · August 2013

I understand, I can just imagine how confused that girl feels and it would hurt to be put down by an online group member, that's all. It's all good mama, I think it is really sweet of you to recognize it and apologize. Now, where is my ice cream? Lol!

boxerbabylove · August 2013

Glad we worked it out ladies. Sorry to go all moderator on you but I just cannot handle the drama lately. I'm also feeling pretty cranky and hormonal so I think it is good for all of us to try and take a step back when we take a wrong step. Giving the other the person the benefit of the doubt can really help. Sometimes the things we say come across differently than we intended. I doubt any one of use would intentionally harm or hurt another.

Really wishing I didn't have a no ice cream in the house rule (keeps my waistline safer). I could go for a little butter pecan creaminess.

thumper11 · August 2013

Of course! I honestly can't believe I was so blunt about it; not my character at all. BUT in my defense (do I get one :-/ ) DD is a teething monster today, and we've been up since 4:30! So it hurt my brain, but that doesn't give me the right to be rude to someone who came here for advice!! Again, my apologies.

ashtonblair123 · August 2013

It happens. I'm really mean when pregnant. I some,times have to really edit what I say, because it comes out way snarky.

SnowOwl7 · August 2013

No offense but I've been on the bump site for a long time. You will need to have a thicker skin if you are on this site. There are more rude comments than puppies and rainbows and that just how the bump rolls. Good luck!

partridgeb06 · August 2013

Haha oh Mama Owl, I am not too worried about hormonal women making snarky comments towards me or my opinions. I just think it's sad when people get attacked for trivial things (who are only seeking support). Not sure that has anything to do with needing to grow "thicker" skin, it simply means that I have a bit of empathy for my fellow brothers and sisters on this planet.. That is great that you have been using this site for so long, maybe you will see a few positive changes during your tenure. Wishing you nothing but love and happiness!

boxerbabylove · August 2013

SnowOwl7 said:

No offense but I've been on the bump site for a long time. You will need to have a thicker skin if you are on this site. There are more rude comments than puppies and rainbows and that just how the bump rolls. Good luck!

I don't think rude comments should be considered acceptable anywhere. If that is the norm, which doesn't surprise me, I think we should strive to do better here. Just tolerating unacceptable behavior just perpetuates the problem.

nikki912 · August 2013

I've already tried sending out the be respectful, stop being pointedly nasty to be people- but honestly I think the people who participate in that kind of rhetoric enjoy it and they aren't going to change. Here's hoping there's enough kind women on here to make a difference!

Avion22 · August 2013

Look, if an individual member has an issue with another individual member, then that's for them to work out amongst themselves. It doesn't warrant a "lets all hold hands and sing songs" post every time it happens.

And I guarantee you that for a lot of us, the ONLY thing we have in common is that we are all pregnant (well, except the people who post on her who aren't yet, but whatever). And to be honest, I think a board where everyone was exactly alike and agreed with each other all the time would be really really boring. It's okay for us to have different opinions, and it's okay for people to disagree sometimes. Disagreement =/= disrespect. I feel like people get all bent out of shape because someone disagrees with them, and that's just immature.

Now, actual disrespectful language (like swear words I guess?) is out...but calling someone out on something, or simply disagreeing, is not in and of itself disrespectful. People need to wrap their brains around that.

MamaFantastic · August 2013

heaven help us if a missive like this is going to be made after every saccharine disagreement. that, to me, is worse than all the new symptom posts.

MrsR912 · August 2013

I think everyone here is great and don't have issues with anyone. But I think this post is highlighting a matter of common courtesy. Be respectful in your communication. Even as far as if you don't have anything nice to say or can't communicate respectfully at the moment, then pass up the post. Weren't we all taught that anyway, and isn't it what most of us will be teaching our kids? Sorry in advance if this is an UO.

MNeforos · August 2013

Positive Ju-Ju people! The Bump shouldn't be a sequel to Mean Girls. We don't want to turn people away from this great resource. I check this board everyday for support, reassurance, and community. Put aside your annoyances and focus on why we are all here...babies!!!

partridgeb06 · August 2013

Some people are missing the direction of this, and hey that's alright.. It is obvious that this online community is used by some individuals to makes themselves feel better by knocking others down a few levels (either just for shits and giggles or because they lack appropriate social skills)..Being honest about yourself, your life, and your opinions is one thing, but attacking somone for the way they type or look (NOT disagreeing with them on a topic etc.) is completely lame..Oh and I am not too bothered if I "set" myself up for scrutiny from some of the members, this isn't middle school. But for all of the entitled sharp tongued ladies out there, there will also be a group kind chicks who will be treating people with some dignity and respect on this site. Much love!

nikki912 · August 2013

I definitely agree about the difference between disrespect and honesty. I love a good healthy respectful debate. But when people make pointed attacks the snark comes off as "bitch" and that's not okay. I think respect is the key. You don't have to blow rainbows up my butt but you should treat me like a human being with feelings. If you don't know the difference then you need a lesson in social intelligence.

AcaAwkward · August 2013

Is this post stemming from a specific incident that I just missed? I don't need a rehash if so...just inquiring as I've yet to see a real pattern of bitchyness around here. Some are more direct than others (maybe me included), but I haven't seen a lot of snark for snark's sake.

partridgeb06 · August 2013

Exactly Nikki.. And this didn't even stem from someone being a B to me, I saw it happen to a teenager on here (and on a few other posts) Not cute... As Sweet Brown would say "Ain't nobody got time for that"..

thumper11 · August 2013

@ooopsbaby14 Lets get something straight, I never said anything about grammar. So don't put words into my mouth. Show me where I went and said "I apologized but didn't mean it". Because if you actually did your research, I never did. I owned up to being rude and said multiple times I could have said my point differently. I really did feel bad about the super snarkiness so keep beating a dead horse, please. (If that makes you feel better, at lease.)

And for what it's worth, I didn't "run" off to another board. That is my home board that I've been apart of for 2 years. Not some random that would listen to anyone, but thanks though.

thumper11 · August 2013

@partridgeb06 I guess we are still on this, which is confusing since I thought we worked it out. How about you finish telling me how you feel so we can get on with it.

thumper11 · August 2013

@ooopsbaby14, this thread was started because of the post I made yesterday. It's only natural to assume it's about the OPs situation.

partridgeb06 · August 2013

Thumper- I am simply responding to OTHER PEOPLE'S comments about how you gotta be cool with the rude shiz to roll on this board. Lol , I thought it was sweet what you posted (still do)..Calm down mama..

thumper11 · August 2013

HORMONES! \m/

partridgeb06 · August 2013

Haha, I feel ya. I just yelled at my FI because we were supposed to leave for the Farmers Market at 10:00, and it is now 10:33 .. Crazy person alert!!!! I need to go apologize..Lol

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