SAHMs

pb_bride · August 2013

What's your typical day like? Do you get any "me" time at all?

How many hours a day are you the sole caretaker of your LO? Do you get any help/relief from family or nannies/babysitters?

How much household chores do you do (50%, 100%?) Does YH help out when he gets home from work and on weekends?

Some days I just get overwhelmed - I feel like all I do is clean and cook, every.single.day. Oh, and take care of DS.

Rachelilly23 · August 2013

MWF DS1 goes to school, so I've been getting some more time to myself. After I take him in, I take DS2 to the park and walk/run. Today it's raining, so we came home and I'm just watching a show and catching up on some chores while he naps. When I pick DS1 up at 1, we come home and have some quiet time before DS1 takes a nap (he typically naps for 2-3 hours.) Eventually I put DS2 down for his second nap, and then work out, shower, and then play with the boys when they wake up until I start dinner and DH comes home from work around 6:30. On T/TH, I just don't get that time for myself in the morning while DS2 naps. I'm busy playing with and entertaining DS1.

DH leaves for work sometimes as early as 5:30, but typically around 6:30. He doesn't get home until 6:30, so I am caring for the boys myself. I change all the diapers, feed the boys, dress them, everything. DH doesn't really do anything when he gets home since that's his time to play with them. I cook and clean up and put DS2 to bed. DH does give DS1 a bath every other night and gets him ready for bed so I get a break. We don't live near family at all (we're military), so we have no help. Some friends offer to watch the boys here and there so we can have a night out.

I do 90% of the household chores and work. The only thing he does is mow the lawn and do yard work. Sometimes he'll clean up after dinner if I really want him to, but I typically do it so he can spend time with the boys and I don't mind doing it since it gives me a "break" from the boys. He really is no help for anything else, but I just kind of accept it since he does work long hours and wants to just relax after work and on weekends. Often times, he has to go into work on weekends too.

Mrs_Lady · August 2013

I used to be a WFHM (work from home mom). I started working out the house one week ago and my LO was 9.5 months

I get me time when he was asleep (his first morning nap) and when hubby returns home..

Typically 7a-515p I watched my LO...now we use daycare 3 days a week.

I clean on Mon/Thurs and cook 2 big meals on Sunday and my son's food for the week.

Its not soo bad now that he is getting older.

tamararachel2 · August 2013

I feel the same way about all I do is clean, cook and take care of LO. It all depends on DH's work schedule. Since he's a police officer, it changes. Usually when he's home, he watches LO like 60% of the time so I can get caught up on housework. Right now, DH is on mid shifts so he leaves for work at 11:30 a.m. and isn't home til 10:00 p.m. or later. DH watches LO while I do my Insanity in the morning, but other than that I'm trying to get DS1 and DS2 fed, get DH breakfast, get my workout in and shower before DH needs to get ready for work. By the time he gets home, kids are asleep and we spend some time together before bed. He goes to nights at the end of the month, so it will all change again. I don't ever get me time, but oh well.

wesleycrusher · August 2013

I watch DD from wake up until DH gets home from work. Most of the year he's home 2 days a week at 5:30, the other 3 days he's not home until after DD is in bed (during summer he's only gone 2 nights). BUT when he's home he's awesome at watching her so I get a break and have time to do things around the house. He has certain "chores" he does and makes dinner sometimes too. He also stays up really late, so after DD and I go to bed he usually gets in a few hours for himself.

For me- I think it's harder as DD is getting older. She always wants to be with me or be entertained, so I can't put her down to get things done like before. The nights where DH isn't home til late- sometimes DD just won't go to bed and it just drives me batty because i want some downtime at the end of the day. I do get really frustrated sometimes. And we don't have family nearby to help out.

I try to get us out of the house everyday. DH takes the bus to/from work but a lot of times we drop him off at work in the morning and run an errand, go to the library, etc. And DD does take about a 2 hour nap in the afternoon (only nap of the day) so that's helpful.

hilsy85 · August 2013

I take care of LO all day every day...DH gets home from work around 530/6, but I wouldn't say he "takes over' caring for LO at that point...I'm still the one feeding him dinner, but DH helps entertain him I guess? On the weekends, DH and I try to take turns sleeping in, but we have different definitions...I let him sleep til 10, he usually wakes me up around 830! Not cool. On the weekends I also feel like I still do most of the caretaking, although DH will play with him or take him if I ask.

My main me time is while LO is napping, like now. I"m lucky in that he tends to take pretty good naps.

We do go out maybe once a week or every other week, and DH's parents will watch him.

I do all the cleaning and household chores...we do have a cleaning lady who comes once a month. I get so discouraged thoug, it's like what's the point of cleaning anything, it just gets dirty/dusty/messy an hour later it seems.

pb_bride · August 2013

Gosh, I guess I shouldn't complain, as most of you guys have it much harder than me.

I take care of DS 10.5 hours a day, 5 days a week. Luckily, he takes 2 good naps a day (totaling 3-3.5 hours) so that's when I do most of my chores... and if I"m lucky, a little "me" time so I can get on the internet to catch up on stuff.

When DS naps, I clean (sweep the floors, laundry, dishes, clean up his mess after he eats), and prep for dinner. I cook and do the dishes 100% of the time. DH gets home at 6:30pm and dinner is ready. AFter dinner, DH reads and plays with DS while I clean up. I nurse DS and DH takes over for bedtime routine. On weekends, DH will watch DS if I need to go out (99.9% of the time, it's grocery shopping).

DH does do some cleaning - mops, dusts floorboards, cleans the toilet. I do all the laundry (we CD, so it's almost daily), cleans the tub/sinks, kitchen. I do all grocery shopping. DH takes out trash and waters the lawn. He also pays the bills and fixes things around the house.

AOBtahoe · August 2013

I recently had a break-down because I've gotten so little "me" time. We have no friends/family to watch DDs, though I do have a daycare provider that I occasionally use. DH is getting better but still not overly helpful, so I do 95% of household stuff and 14 hours of childcare, 7 days a week.

My plan is to to use my daycare provider more, I'm hiring a new babysitter soon so that DH and I can occasionally have nights free again (or I can have girls nights again!), and I have a housecleaner come once a month. It gets pricey, and kind of cancels out the money I get working freelance, but I've come to realize there's no price on my sanity- it was really starting to affect me and my marriage that I felt like all my time and energy went into the house. Also, I started reading The Feminine Mystique, which I think should be a must read for SAHMs! Helped me realize I was not the only one feeling the insanity and loneliness of staying at home.

Mrs_Lady · August 2013

Hugs to those with family far away!it does suck at times!

tamararachel2 · August 2013

piffle42 said:

DH usually takes out the trash and empties the dishwasher. He also grills a lot so I don't have to cook all the time. He's been putting DD to sleep lately too, which is a big help. Other then that I do everything. DS starts school again next week so I'll be driving 25 minutes each way twice a day, which will probably mess up DDs nap schedule. Right now I get no time to myself because DS is home from school. After he starts school my only alone time will be nap time. DH is typically gone 12 hours for work 5 days a week. He always has other stuff to do at home so his help is pretty much limited to putting DD to sleep. Occasionally he'll help play with her if I need to get something done. He does that more on the weekends but I try to get all the cleaning done during the week.

Does your DS have a bud he can ride? DS1 is starting kindergarten at the end of the month, but with us living out in the country as well as me driving a gas guzzler, DH and I decided to have DS1 ride the bus. I was a little worried at first, but DS1 is actually really excited about it!

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