CIO confusion

Starfish02807 · August 2013

Ok ladies....I have completely confused my baby and now I don't know what to do! My pedi told me to have her cry it out, all night type of a deal. As in cry it out to go to sleep, and then when she wakes the first time cry it out then nurse her the second time. So I had her cry it out the first night but nursed her when she woke at twelve and then she was up at 1:30, 3, 4, 5:30 and I nursed her everytime. Second night cry it out (which takes no more then 30 minutes) up at 10:30, 12, 2, 4:30 nursed her all the times. I guess my resistance to not nursing her is we have a downstairs tenant and I don't want to disrupt her sleep by having her cry all night and I think lo must be hungry some of the times she wakes up. Then there is the whole pacifier question, do you let them cry it out with a pacifier and go in when they spit it out? I am just really confused and I am afraid I have confused my lo too. Advice please, I need to hit the reset button come up with a solid plan and stick to it!

carriesu2003 · August 2013

If I were you I would try to half the number of feedings each week and continue doing that till you are down to one. So maybe let her cry herself to sleep then nurse if she wakes at 12. But don't nurse again until 3ish. In between I would use the paci, pick her up, rock her till she is calm, whatever and then put her down in her crib awake so she could fall asleep on her own. I don't think there is any way of doing it without having a few rough nights with no sleep and plenty of crying. I would just give the tenant a heads up and apologize, maybe buy them earplugs and leave a note.

spainy17 · August 2013

I have this problem right now too and need replies... DD goes down easily at night nursing till drowsy but once she wakes once I am screwed. I have been letting her fuss and if she is still fusing after ten minutes I go feed her but every night the times awake has increased and then I get tired and erratic and I am sure I have confused her. I feel terrible and suck suck suck at cry it out but don't know what to do either.

maroongolf · August 2013

I suggest reading the Sleep Easy Solution. It explains how to cry it out and addresses night feedings. Basically you want to always respond to baby the same way so she doesn't get confused. Every time she wakes at night you let her cry (with check ins). Then you plan to wake her up to feed her about an hour before her regular feeding times. So she isn't confused, because sometimes she is fed and sometimes she isn't. The book explains how to drop all the night feedings or how to keep a dream feed if you feel she still needs an overnight feeding. As for the paci, you can put her to bed with it, but don't keep putting it back in. The point of CIO is so she can learn to soothe herself without your intervention. Hope this helps!

Mom2anAngel2 · August 2013

DS usually wakes up once during the night, at which time I will nurse him. If he wakes up any other time we will given him a few minutes to see if he will put himself back to sleep. If he does not put himself back to sleep we will go in and pat him on the back (some times turn his mobile back on). That is usually enough to get him back to sleep. In the beginning I could not pat him on the back, only DH could do this, because if he saw me he expected to eat. DS actually STTN last night for the first time. I actually woke up at 5:30 and bolted up in bed because I thought something was wrong, but DS was sound asleep. I hope it isn't a fluke, a full night of sleep was amazing!

Chappy_jr · August 2013

Are these multiple wake-up times normal for her or are they a new occurrence? I would definitely recommend you read a pro-CIO book if this is an approach you feel comfortable with (Ferber, Weisbluth, Sleep Easy, etc.) so you have a detailed plan and KNOW the plan before you really implement it.

If you are uneasy about the crying because of your tenant, then you are likely to give in from time to time. And trust me, intermittent reinforcement is the most effective type of reinforcement (think of slot machines and scratch lottery tickets and how addictive they are). I know because I am an educational psychologist and YET I have still managed to intermittently reinforce DS's wakings at night. So, I would recommend either talking to your tenant and explaining the situation/offering a temporary reduction for compensation of lost sleep or choose a less-cry/no-cry method.

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