birth plans

og0611 · August 2013

Is it ok to not write a birth plan? I briefly talked to my ob about this topic and she gave me an odd look when I told her Im choosing not to write one.

HFrizzle · August 2013

Yep, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do or feel necessary. I did it once and it all pretty much went out the window. Just go with the flow and be ok that something different may come up.

SnoopyLuv · August 2013

I didn't write one last time and no one ever asked. I'd probably feel weird as hell handing a paper to the nurse saying what I wanted, I mean what's there that you can't just say "I'd rather not have pain meds offered, let me ask" or whatever.

My birth plan this time? Make it to term, make it to hospital, have baby. BAM.

shelley1002 · August 2013

I never wrote one. Just told DH that I wanted an epi when I asked for one and only him in the room during delivery unless there were complications. Then I wanted my mom in there too since she's a nurse and could tell me what was going on while the doctor and nurses did what they needed to do.
Other than that I just went with the flow.

tashad18 · August 2013

I had no written birth plan with DS, and I recall tons of stuff being done without anyone asking me. I want to be more prepared this time, but I'm not necessarily making a written plan. My OB hasn't mentioned the subject. DH and I have discussed certain things and what we want to happen in an ideal situation, but we know that things can happen so we are ready for the unexpected.

og0611 · August 2013

NRyan55 said:

Your nurses will love you. Unless you are specifically opposed to certain interventions just state your wishes and you will be fine. Birth plans are way over the top, especially when delivered with baked goods, as if that will make the nurses ignore the 20 page "Birth Mission Statement".

hahaha. what's your opinion on baked goods and gift baskets for the nurses for cleaning your during delivery poop??

Amjoy25 · August 2013

NRyan55 said:

og0611 said:

NRyan55 said:

Your nurses will love you. Unless you are specifically opposed to certain interventions just state your wishes and you will be fine. Birth plans are way over the top, especially when delivered with baked goods, as if that will make the nurses ignore the 20 page "Birth Mission Statement".

hahaha. what's your opinion on baked goods and gift baskets for the nurses for cleaning your during delivery poop??

I am pro baked goods, but not in an effort to smooth over a birthing plan from hell.

Also, it's their job, and as L&D nurses they don't care about your poop. Baked goods are always good though

norbert5 · August 2013

My midwife gave me a single page form that they use for basic/routine things.

It is the same form I have used twice before. The nurses have been really good about following but it is basic yes and no questions.

Would you like the lights dimmed? Would you like us to allow visitors in while you are in labor? kind of stuff.

CousinVicki · August 2013

omg, handwritten ones are laughably douchey.

og0611 · August 2013

CousinVicki said:

omg, handwritten ones are laughably douchey.

is it better if its typed? and possibly highlighted? haha

CousinVicki · August 2013

og0611 said:

CousinVicki said:

omg, handwritten ones are laughably douchey.

is it better if its typed? and possibly highlighted? haha

i am sure there are people that do this!!! no, there should be none, just tell your Dr and your HUSBAND what you want. no need for a detailed 5 page bulleted plan.

og0611 · August 2013

CousinVicki said:

og0611 said:

CousinVicki said:

omg, handwritten ones are laughably douchey.

is it better if its typed? and possibly highlighted? haha

i am sure there are people that do this!!! no, there should be none, just tell your Dr and your HUSBAND what you want. no need for a detailed 5 page bulleted plan.

well damn! i also wanted to put in in a color coded binder. haha but in all seriousness im glad to hear im not the only one not doing this. my ob made it seem like it was a must.

marianaz0 · August 2013

Honestly IMHO birth 'plans' set your expectations way too high and leave too much room for 'failure'! Having been an L&D nurse for 5+ years, I know better... Things happens, babies and bodies don't cooperate, doctors and patients develop different plan of care views etc
If there are some things you specifically want/ don't want to happen during your experience just let your nurses know. We are not the enemy and are there to advocate for your wishes keeping in mind you and your little ones safety and well being. Yes cleaning your poo while you push is my 'job' and I don't expect any contribution... But a thank you, and baked goods never hurt lol

PS I don't know how it is where you are delivering but upon admission I ask questions and fill a computerized form that covers most everything in a birth plan... From pain relief options, to cord blood banking, newborn meds, feeding options, laboring options etc etc so no extensive written, photoshopped, highlighted, or thrice underlined birth plan is needed!

Weljadraak · August 2013

quartermisses said:

With DD1, they GAVE me a sheet to fill out that was essentially a birth plan, and then promptly ignore everything I had a strong feeling about, which really wasn't that much. Mostly, I didn't want anyone to push an epidural on me. So, of course, that's EXACTLY what they did. Every time a medical professional walked into my room they asked me "when" they could call the anesthesiologist to get my epidural going. And when I said I wanted to avoid one, they told me how stupid I was. Eventually I caved (and still regret it), but it still pisses me off that they acted like it was a challenge since I put it down on THEIR form. Asshats.

Dislike

This is exactly what I don't want to happen!

Starofd00m · August 2013

FTM here, and IMHO it was helpful to look over the "fill in the blank" plan The Bump has for DL/printing, because honestly some of that stuff they had on there I had to google. So it's good for learning about what MAY happen, and giving you some idea of what procedures and medications to look up online lol. But like what everyone else says, the "plan" pretty much always goes out the window!

You know, we joke about color coded binders and highlighted sections and whatnot....what's really funny is that actually happens :-P

SuperTreesa · August 2013

My hospital has a Birth Preferences sheet they prefer all moms to fill out. Its like 3 pages long and outlines the different interventions. It's pretty much multiple choice. Like epi's, short definition of what it is. Then asking you, a. I would like one as soon as possible. B. I would like to try to go natural but it's okay to ask me if I'd like one. C. Please don't discuss this with me during labor unless there is an emergency. It's really nice because it's standardized and straight forward. They like it in your file when your md or mw per-register you for the hospital.

ksimo6 · August 2013

I am not writing one. I assume this kid will come as she pleases and i have already made my mind up about drugs... I assume they are wonderful!

nbcarlson · August 2013

I don't have strong feelings either way. When I talked to my doctor about it he said I should write it down and bring it because that way I get an idea of the things I should be thinking about and I won't be blindsided by a question that hasn't even crossed my mind. He just said to make sure and remember that they never go as planned haha.

sfshorter · August 2013

my birth plan is to not have a birth plan. I figure the nurses trying to take care of LO and me have enough going on without having to read through a document that may or may not be possible or realistic. I have a feeling, knowing my doctor, that if I showed up with one he would throw it out the window. Literally.

topofthepeek · August 2013

Im not writing one,my birth plan is simple, Get the baby out safely

MrsStuessyWI · August 2013

well, my doctor would like you. I brought my birth plan to show my doctor at my appt this week and she looked at me like I was an idiot. As a FTM I honestly wanted her opinion on everything I had written down. She made it seem like it was a HUGE chore to read over it. I was disappointed in her attitude.

As far as a birth plan setting you up for disappointment.... I would much rather be disappointed than not have a say in anything that happens during my labor and birth. I think that is a pretty lame excuse. Life is full of disappointment. I can get my big girl panties on and deal with that. I don't see anything wrong with making my preferences known.

But, it really is up to you whether or not you want a birth plan. I am hoping for a natural birth over here... so I feel that it is a good idea for me to have one. Whatever you think you need to feel good about your birth.

katenpaul · August 2013

I've worked in L&D two years now and love it. Think of a birth plan as a "wish list," things are bound to change as the entire labor process is unpredictable. If you want to labor at home but your water breaks and you don't have contractions, your doc will probably have you come in and get pitocin. The birth plans I've seen fall into two categories; what the nurses plan on doing anyway, or completely inappropriate and off the wall. You absolutely need to know what your OB plans to do because its their orders that must be followed by the nurses. Do not create a plan bc you feel like you have to have one... And if you make one, keep it to one realistic page. Definitely be able to explain WHY you want something done the way you've written it out though, I can't tell you how often my patients have no clue what they "want" other than that's what they saw online. Be open to the unpredictable nature of labor and be flexible. I do my best to work with my patients when their goals are realistic and don't pose any harm to mother or baby.

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