Irish Twins: When does it get easier?

mamathompson7 · August 2013

My two babies are 364 days apart, My son is 14 months old and my daughter is two months old, and I feel like I can just barely surviving each day. At the end of the day I have gotten nothing done but that my children, happy and alive but no laundry and dishes no napping for mommy, And at the end of the day I am so exhausted! Is there an age where I can expect it to get a touch easier?

jesselayne8 · August 2013

Mine are 19 months and 2 months. What saves me is having them nap at the same time. They both usually sleep from 12pm-2 or 3pm. I take a nap usually 3 days a week and try to be productive the other days. My 2 month old sleeps in the swing in order for this to work out. They also both go to bed by 8pm so I usually spend 30-60 min washing dishes and pickin up toys. Otherwise the beds go unmade and sometimes it's sandwiches for dinner but those aren't a big deal to me. I also have a cleaning service come 1-2x a month because I never have time for real cleaning.

smerka · August 2013

I vote for getting their naps coordinated. It does get easier when they both sleep through the night. Don't be hard on yourself about not getting much done. At that age I had a post it with less than five things on it like wash bottles, cut my nails,etc. very simple stuff. I rarely finished the list.

lilshuh · August 2013

Hang in there! Mine are 361 days apart, and we are going on 9 months and 21 months. It does get better once they are both sleeping, and the younger one is crawling or walking. When they can do more things together, they will start entertaining each other, and you can start doing things that you want to do again...

katwoman08 · August 2013

I second sending the older child to daycare if that is an option and also a cleaning lady if that too is an option. Also we had family come over that would volunteer to help with things around the house. I am not sure when it gets easier but I figure once the little one is sleeping through the night things will get better. For me the hardest part is being sleep deprived.

mamathompson7 · August 2013

Thank you ladies! It has gotten a 'touch' easier since my 2 month old is sleeping in a pretty decent 7 hour stretch these days. My 14 month old is just to active! She is not on a nap schedule yet (my son is), I kind of just let them make their own schedule this young.... If it works out that they are both sleeping, then I try to be productive, but if they are alternating then I feel like I at least get to spend a little quality time with the awake one.

I DID start taking my son to a babysitter's house 2-3 days or afternoons a week and I feel like this helps either just do 'something' for me, clean (yeah right), and spend some time with my newborn.

I start back to work as a kindergarten teacher next week, so I think that may help a little because we will be on a set routine.

Thanks ladies!!

JulyMomma2U2 · August 2013

Hahahaha!!! I'm laughing because I was just coming on this board to, essentially, post the exact same thing!! Mine are 362 days apart.. My youngest is almost 1 month, and my oldest almost 13 months.. it's exhausting!! For the past 3 days I've been telling DH I'd do the grocery shopping.. and, every day.. it doesn't get done!! Laundry, forget it.. dishes, barely! Me, shower? What's that??! LOL. I've not read all the replies (yet -- time is limited these days ;-)), but i'm hoping once DS2 is on more of a schedule I can get them to nap at the same time and find more "me" time.. right now any down time is spent pumping (and bumping!! LOL) and washing bottles, prepping meals for DS1, etc! Yawn.. thank goodness it's Friday.. oh wait, that doesn't really mean much anymore!! LOL!

kcisthebombdotcom · August 2013

I felt like it took a good three months before I felt somewhat comfortable (although admittedly I set my expectations way low for housework). Once we got #2 to about nine months old and the kids got a little more interested in each other it got even easier. At 3.5 and 2.5 I think it's easier than having a singleton or trying to manage an infant and 3.5 year old because they keep each other entertained.

ktshafra · August 2013

Mine are 364 days apart too! They'll turn 1 and 2 in a couple weeks and ever day/week/month gets easier. It does. It'll never be a breeze, but you'll get better at finding ways to manage, too. I let our home become a disaster during the day, I'm okay with tv on most of the day, we'll take multiple bubble baths each day just for fun... It'll take time to find what works for you, but you will. It's also hard while the baby doesn't really have any schedule yet. That definitely helps some. You're doing great! All they need is love. And make sure you get time alone to destress, too. That helps tremendously.

sarahlanell03 · August 2013

Mine are 14 months and 2 months right now also...I am just glad to know that I am not the only one who is not getting anything "extra" (like the laundry or dishes) done!

mtm0109 · August 2013

Our children are 12 months apart. I agree with PP, coordinating nap times is huge!
Also our children go to bed at 7pm and 8pm, we get a lot done at this time.

But we have all been there, things start to pile up but try not to worry. It will get easier!

WhitePicketFence · August 2013

smerka said:
I vote for getting their naps coordinated. It does get easier when they both sleep through the night. Don't be hard on yourself about not getting much done. At that age I had a post it with less than five things on it like wash bottles, cut my nails,etc. very simple stuff. I rarely finished the list.

I totally agree with all of this. Once I got my girls (18 months apart) on the same nap schedule and once they were both STTN, things became so much easier. We really hit our stride once DD2 turned one. DD1 was so much more independent by that point that I felt like I was no longer just in survival mode.

MuddyInsignia · August 2013

Ours will be 13 months apart--and I am terrified of this--I am already so slow running after my 11 month old while pregnant. I stay at home, but I broke down and hired someone to come in and help a few days a week. Today was her first morning helping me--which was perfect as I ended up being sick most of the morning and she helped clean AND watch our baby. I know this might not be an option for everyone--but around us, there are many people out of work and some really great, nice, responsible people that it has worked out well for us to make this jump. If you live somewhere and have the means to do this, I would highly recommend it. I would have also jumped at the possibility of family helping, but we have no family nearby--they are all at least a day's travel away.

Nita2603 · August 2013

Lurker butting in...
My boys are just under 11 months apart.
I am not going to sugarcoat it: it is hard. The hardest thing we had to do ever. But, it does get easier. My little one is just about to turn 1. Ever since he started crawling, it has become a lot easier - they play together a bit now and that gives me room to breathe. And he also just started sleeping through the night, so we are feeling like completely new parents.

I really really found that coordinating naps helped. It took a lot of adjusting and playing around, but now they do take one big nap at the same time.

The other thing is - don't stress. You probably won't have the cleanest and most organized house for a while, you may not get out much and you probably will be in survival mode for a while. That is ok. It will get better, but it takes a while. Until then, don't pressure yourself.

Oh, and lastly, accept all the help that is offered, always.

Good luck!

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