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New and Leaving (my long frustration story) TMI*
Hi,
I just came here to vent my frustration on how women can be so mean.
I just join thebump yesterday, and I have been TTC after a loss (obviously I join that group for support). So after tracking my DPO and doing some testing, I had weird results by switching brands, and of course I decided to ask about pregnancy test brand and differences. WORST MISTAKE EVER -_-' Those women just wanted me out and throw rock at me for asking the question saying "that was inappropriate and to get out!" "that if I am pregnant I shouldn't be there"...
Seriously, if I discover I am pregnant I would not ask any question to them, I would go straight to my doctor to confirm the result through blood test. The thing is that I taught that was a support group for woman like me who M/C and are trying again to have a baby and having question on the process, on DPO, on random things about trying again.
However, I was told by the ladies the forum is a support for women going through the loss... But the title doesn't mean that to me and not to be rude there are lots of forum just for the lost. "Loss" "Pregnancy Loss" etc... Which i have read in the past for my own support, I never even taught of going in TTC after a loss when I loose a baby, cuz I would not have been ready to hear other women saying they are back in TTC when I just bleeded my life.
I don't think it is legit for me to go into the pregnant after a loss to ask the question, knowing that I may not be... So I am frustrated to be "called rude" for looking for support into the forum that seemed right to me. It is not the first I saw or read back stab comments like those that happen to me in this forum and I rather TTC in peace and no one judging me, so I am leaving the bump.
I do know not everyone are like that, but that was just too much to tolerate. And I e-mailed the customer services already.
Thanks for reading my venting.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: New and Leaving (my long frustration story) TMI*
Me: 38, DH: 40 | Married April 2012 | TTC since October 2012
DX: Hypothyroid, DOR, Right Tube Blocked, Uterine Fibroid (awaiting hysteroscopy) | DH: Beta Thal Minor, ED (Cialis)
OCT - DEC 2012 | TI | BFN
JAN 2013 | BFP ~ EDD 9/23/13
MAR 2013 | MMC due to Trisomy 10 ~ D&E MAR. 8
APR - JUN 2013 | TTA
JUL - NOV 2013 | TI | BFN
NOV 2013 | HSG & SHG ~ Right Tube Blocked & "Thickening" of Uterus
DEC 2013 - JAN 2014 | NTNP | BFN ~ Switched to new practice
JAN - FEB 2014 | 3-D u/s & SHG ~ Uterine Fibroid ~ Awaiting Hysteroscopy
***All Are Welcome!***
THE DARK SIDE IT IS
and GBCB
BFP 8/2/12 EDD 4/9/13 Addie was delivered 1/4/13 at 26 weeks due to Eclampsia
BFP 9/15/14 EDD 5/28/15 Please be our R A I N B O W take home baby BOY
~All AL always welcome~
This is a classic case of "lurk, a lot, before you post".
I understand that you were confused, and wanted feedback. You can ALWAYS come here if necessary.
Lurking will help you determine if 1) your question has been asked 1239847 times that day, 2) your question hasn't been asked because it's not appropriate for that board, or 3) your question has been asked occasionally and you've hit the right board.
It sounds to me like you went to a loss board, where the last thing on people's minds is a pg test. They're grieving, and emotions are raw. There are certain boards that have to be entered gently, much like you wouldn't just walk up to a crying person and start telling her about your fabulous life. Lurking can really help you there. You could have even tried a non-loss board like the TTGP board.
Also, flamings are just par for the course on a public message board. People are more frank, and you have to have a tough skin while you learn the ropes. I'm a grizzled veteran who has been at least minorly flamed on almost every board I've visited, at one point or another.
If you decide to stay, lurk. A lot. It's really helpful.
:-O
:-O
I know, I always say I would never wish the kind of crap we've been through on my worst enemy. Karma? You are a peach.
I'm going to second what @Dr.Loretta said - take the time to lurk and learn what is appropriate on the board where you are posting.
You went on Babies on the Brain, asked a question and told them how to respond. Someone telling you what you do not want to hear is not being a "bitch". @BallSox gave you a thoughtful, honest answer. Just because you did not like it does not make it cruel or nasty or mean.
This person you are defending came onto our board and posted about her BFP. Her question was not appropriate for that board and she was directed to the right board to go to. No one was nasty or mean until she became nasty and mean to us.
The day the Bump died - Jasper is wise
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
As a result of all the reports I have seen and the conversation going on here, I would encourage everyone to review the Community Rules.
While I am addressing various issues with individual users, please know that this is a public warning for those tolling, attacking, etc.
Thanks for understanding.
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Telling people how they are allowed to respond to a post isn't "carefully wording" it, it's asinine. Clearly, you haven't figured things out yet.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
Seriously, what's the deal @BumpJackie ?