S/O weaning...

TJ1979 · August 2013

I think MH and I have decided that we are ready to get serious about TTC#2. We're going to set a specific date we are okay trying on our own until, and I might go ahead and schedule an RE consult in the mean time so that I know what to be prepared for... what testing I might have to redo, if we will stay with the same plan, how long prior I will need to wean, etc.

So I know that this means I will need to actually wean at some point. I don't even know where to begin. I have dropped one pump at work, and she's getting a bottle of frozen milk to replace that. So I guess we need to use up the frozen stash, then start experimenting with milk options. (Or maybe experiment in between, so we have a replacement when I run out of frozen stash.) She has had milk protein intolerance issues, but I ate cheese the other day (gasp!) and she was fine. So maybe she has grown out of it? Then I guess the next step is to phase out her after work feeding, then drop another pump, then just keep phasing out feedings and pumps till we're done.

This seems so hard and unfair. But I know I'm doing it for good reasons, and we've made it for so long. I should be proud of what I have accomplished so far, and be excited to move forward. And I am. I am so proud of myself, and I am so excited about another LO hopefully. And I understand that weaning is part of the process. But can you please tell me why, if I am planning on weaning soon, why do I get so very upset when I have a pump that is less than normal? This should be a good thing! A good sign that my body is getting the message and we will have a smoother transition. But no. For so long my feelings of self worth have been tied to my milk production. How do you get over this mentally?

Sorry this got so long and rambly. My head is all wonky thinking about all of this.

mdiblasi10 · August 2013

You have done an absolutely amazing job nursing E for so long!!! That is seriously impressive

I know the feelings you are having about weaning because I went through them too. I don't have any advice on how to get over it mentally though. I still miss it after two months of G being weaned. It does get better and knowing the reason you are doing it will help when you are feeling down. Hang in there, momma! Hugs!

mcgeeva · August 2013

I think you just do because you know you have to stop to be able to start trying for another. Your baby is a year so you've already done awesome. I stopped a week before my son turned one. It is hard because you feel you are providing something special no one else can from them. The only thing that truly was amazing..being able to just go to sleep at night with no pumping!!! And no pumping at work and only carrying a pump anymore. I finally started using a purse again. Then my boobs turned to raisens..the downside haha. But hang in there it will get better with time! I still thing our kids are always better at transitioning then we are. I still get my snuggle time in with my son when I give him his sippy cup with whole milk right before bed when we read a book. No clue when I am suppose to stop that but for now it works. Kudos for doing it so long!

Cwhitaker27 · August 2013

Props to you TJ for making it to a year! That is a huge commitment and you've done well. Ill always remember what my OB told me when I was conflicted about weaning at 6 months which is "don't worry he'll still go to Harvard". Some might be offended but I took a step back and thought she's right!

I think the hardest part was giving up that special bonding time but bottle feeds can be just as rewarding even if its not breast milk.
I actually felt relieved once I weaned. I felt like a " free woman" so to speak. I hope you see this as an accomplishment and not a failure to E. Ultimately having a sibling/playmate for E will be worth it all.

Robeano · August 2013

I have no thoughts on this subject as we are not there yet. But I do offer big hugs to you. I totally get your feelings being wrapped up in breast feeding, you worked very hard to get where you are. You should be proud of yourself!

PennyLane26 · August 2013

Way to go TJ! I envy your year of nursing!! I am already considering weaning for the 6 month mark... well, we will start dropping feedings late August and make the transition to formula as we go.

I think I mentioned it it to @kaf7 in a previous thread, but the reason you are weaning is the BEST reason to do it. I am the oldest of 5 and my brothers and sisters are my best friends. I think siblings are the biggest gift you could give to E. (((hugs))) I am sad thinking about dropping feedings, too.

pb_bride · August 2013

TJ, like others said, you are amazing and such an inspiration for me (and I'm sure many of us here on PAIF). You have had so many hurdles with BFing, yet you made it to 1 year and some more.

I don't have any words of wisdom, but I know I'll be interested in your weaning process over the course of next few weeks->months. M is 9 months now and I am dreading the weaning. In fact, I get teary and emotional just by the thought of that. Hugs to you and hope your weaning process goes smoothly.

Mrs.Umm · August 2013

I have no advice, but I totally understand how you feel. I pumped 3 oz yesterday afternoon, and got seriously stressed. Until I picked him up and found out he had only taken 4 oz all day. I'm trying to wean enough to not have to pump once school starts back up.

Mrs.AmyDylan · August 2013

Hugs! No advice, just encouragement. You can do it, mama! I dread weaning. I'm so desperately hoping for a surprise so I can tandem nurse or wean at J's readiness.

kaf7 · August 2013

No advice yet as I have just made it through the first 16h of not breast feeding...I totally understand your feelings though and I send you and everyone else who ever has had to wean or is thinking about it hugs. It is tough. It definitely is tied up with my self identity as mother to LO. And the combo of giving it up plus being back at work makes it really hard for me. I am trying to do everything else the same and we still snuggled during bottle feeds tonight. It helps a little that he is digging the intro to cereals. I will let you know if it gets easier. Hugs again.

TJ1979 · August 2013

Thank you all for the advice, support, and hugs. I feel like BFing is my greatest parenting tool, so I worry I won't be very good at this when I lose that tool. I think that if I had planned to wean at 1 year all along, I would have had more time to prepare and get used to the idea. But I am delusional and really thought I had a chance at a surprise, and wouldn't have to worry about weaning to TTC. Sigh.

srveatch · August 2013

You have been a huge support for me and probably the reason I didn't quit in the very beginning! I have been thinking about weaning for the same reasons as you and get upset every time I think about it. I love the closeness A and I have and I use it as a parenting tool to soothe A when she gets upset. I guess we will figure it out. I just wanted to wish you luck with weaning and TTC.

TJ1979 · August 2013

srveatch said:
You have been a huge support for me and probably the reason I didn't quit in the very beginning! I have been thinking about weaning for the same reasons as you and get upset every time I think about it. I love the closeness A and I have and I use it as a parenting tool to soothe A when she gets upset. I guess we will figure it out. I just wanted to wish you luck with weaning and TTC.

Wow, thanks girl! That really makes me feel good, I'm so happy I could provide some support to you and that you got through your struggles. GL to you as well. Such a tough decision!

Want a personalized experience?

S/O weaning...

Re: S/O weaning...

Choose Another Board

Search Boards