HTT: Parental Rights

sleepy33 · August 2013

HTT: If a parent has had their parental rights terminated on a child, should they automatically lose their parental rights for all subsequent children?

sleepy33 · August 2013

My opinion: no, unless they have been found to be responsible for the death or sexual abuse of a previous child.

Jenball717 · August 2013

I guess it depends on the situation they were terminated for the first. Abuse should definitely be monitored for any additional children. I'm also okay with forced sterilization for repeat offenders. Like drug babies and abused babies.

Wino0920 · August 2013

As much as I want to say yes, I have to say no. People can change. It's not realistic to say yes.

It just scares me because of how crappy the system is, to get your parental rights terminated is pretty much saying your the monster of all monsters. I know so many people who should've had their rights terminated and they still get chance after chance.

sleepy33 · August 2013

Wino0920 said:

As much as I want to say yes, I have to say no. People can change. It's not realistic to say yes. It just scares me because of how crappy the system is, to get your parental rights terminated is pretty much saying your the monster of all monsters. I know so many people who should've had their rights terminated and they still get chance after chance.

Wow, this is surprising coming from you!

I like it.

Chrisanna0508 · August 2013

sleepy33 said:

HTT: If a parent has had their parental rights terminated on a child, should they automatically lose their parental rights for all subsequent children?

Do you include in this people who voluntarily give up their rights?

Inn2 · August 2013

No. I agree with everything stated above. I totally believe there are some crimes, committed by parents/guardians, that should have a zero forgiveness policy and deny them rights to further contact with children.

sleepy33 · August 2013

Chrisanna0508 said:

sleepy33 said:

HTT: If a parent has had their parental rights terminated on a child, should they automatically lose their parental rights for all subsequent children?

Do you include in this people who voluntarily give up their rights?

Hmm, I don't know. Expound.

tmccord21 · August 2013

btimes3 said:

sleepy33 said:

My opinion: no, unless they have been found to be responsible for the death or sexual abuse of a previous child.

This, and I'll also go with violent physical abuse. You break your kid's arm or jaw, or deliberately burn them, no more children for you, ever.

Yup. All of this.

hartsl01 · August 2013

Chrisanna0508 said:

sleepy33 said:

HTT: If a parent has had their parental rights terminated on a child, should they automatically lose their parental rights for all subsequent children?

Do you include in this people who voluntarily give up their rights?

Do you mean like if a teenager gives up his/her rights at the age of 16... they'd have to with any future children? (this is all I think about with voluntarily giving up rights, obviously there are more)

jackiesue586 · August 2013

I think it depends on the case.

Some people lose custody and change to make a better life for their kids but some just get worse.

I have a neighbor I babysat for. She didn't have custody of her oldest child but had 2 other boys. This woman should not be able to have them. I walked in one day and the baby was walking around with a baggie full of xanax. I called cps and they didn't do anything. It just shows how over worked and flawed our system is.

HFrizzle · August 2013

Guess it depends on the circumstances of the first offense.

tashad18 · August 2013

I think these issues have to be examined on a case by case basis. That's my personal opinion. There are clearly situations where a person keeps exhibiting the behavior repeatedly. However, there are situations where people change their life and clean up their act. I have seen both sides of the issue.

carawasa · August 2013

I'm torn on this. Working in social services, I know the main priority is for family reunification, do I agree with that? Not always. I mean the courts give families years and years to prove themselves worthy of taking care of their children along with numerous chances.

So if, in the end, the child gets taken away from the family it's because it was the last option and probably needed to be done. Once a kid is taken away, its permanent. Usually, it won't happen the 1st, 2nd, or 3rd time of calling CPS - if CPS even went out and did an investigation! So I guess my question is why would the parent be a fit parent to one child but not the other?

Chrisanna0508 · August 2013

sleepy33 said:

Chrisanna0508 said:

sleepy33 said:

HTT: If a parent has had their parental rights terminated on a child, should they automatically lose their parental rights for all subsequent children?

Do you include in this people who voluntarily give up their rights?

Hmm, I don't know. Expound.

DH has two sons and he voluntarily gave up his parental rights to them when he and his wife got divorced. For one thing, she wanted him totally out of their lives and was saying crap like she was going to take all his money and he would never see them and then she didn't want paternity tests done on them. Also, he did not get along with his ex at all and she was physically abusive to him. He thought that it was in the best interest of his children at the time, plus his douchebag father told him that it was the right thing to do. He has regretted it since that day because he now sees the other options that were open to him and I think that this is why he has been very conflicted about our having a baby now since he has tortured himself for so many years about giving up his boys.

Wino0920 · August 2013

@sleepy Lol!!! I'm full of surprises.

sleepy33 · August 2013

Chrisanna0508 said:

sleepy33 said:

Chrisanna0508 said:

sleepy33 said:

HTT: If a parent has had their parental rights terminated on a child, should they automatically lose their parental rights for all subsequent children?

Do you include in this people who voluntarily give up their rights?

Hmm, I don't know. Expound.

DH has two sons and he voluntarily gave up his parental rights to them when he and his wife got divorced. For one thing, she wanted him totally out of their lives and was saying crap like she was going to take all his money and he would never see them and then she didn't want paternity tests done on them. Also, he did not get along with his ex at all and she was physically abusive to him. He thought that it was in the best interest of his children at the time, plus his douchebag father told him that it was the right thing to do. He has regretted it since that day because he now sees the other options that were open to him and I think that this is why he has been very conflicted about our having a baby now since he has tortured himself for so many years about giving up his boys.

See, I would say this is a good argument for not having a black and white rule about people who have had rights terminated.

finnybooboo · August 2013

When I first read this, I thought you meant if a person had parental rights taken away from ONE child, but they had more then one, that those children should be taken away too. But I guess that doesn't make sense, as if someone has been deemed to be an unfit parent and cannot have parental rights, all other children in the household would be under the same umbrella.

For future children, I think it's a sticky point. Ideally, if anyone has had their parental rights taken away, they should be "cleared" as a fit parent before another child is put into their custody. I'm not sure how realistic that is though, but in my opinion would be the best way to ensure the safety of the child. This is a hard one!

carawasa · August 2013

sleepy33 said:

Chrisanna0508 said:

sleepy33 said:

Chrisanna0508 said:

sleepy33 said:

HTT: If a parent has had their parental rights terminated on a child, should they automatically lose their parental rights for all subsequent children?

Do you include in this people who voluntarily give up their rights?

Hmm, I don't know. Expound.

DH has two sons and he voluntarily gave up his parental rights to them when he and his wife got divorced. For one thing, she wanted him totally out of their lives and was saying crap like she was going to take all his money and he would never see them and then she didn't want paternity tests done on them. Also, he did not get along with his ex at all and she was physically abusive to him. He thought that it was in the best interest of his children at the time, plus his douchebag father told him that it was the right thing to do. He has regretted it since that day because he now sees the other options that were open to him and I think that this is why he has been very conflicted about our having a baby now since he has tortured himself for so many years about giving up his boys.

See, I would say this is a good argument for not having a black and white rule about people who have had rights terminated.

yea but his rights weren't terminated by a judge, he mad the decision. it sucks that some people can be so spiteful and use their kids when their relationship goes bad (like his ex wife). it doesn't mean he was an unfit father to his boys, or be one to his new baby. I was thinking your original post was towards people who had their rights terminated in court (for neglect or something like that)

sleepy33 · August 2013

carawasa said:

sleepy33 said:

Chrisanna0508 said:

sleepy33 said:

Chrisanna0508 said:

sleepy33 said:

HTT: If a parent has had their parental rights terminated on a child, should they automatically lose their parental rights for all subsequent children?

Do you include in this people who voluntarily give up their rights?

Hmm, I don't know. Expound.

DH has two sons and he voluntarily gave up his parental rights to them when he and his wife got divorced. For one thing, she wanted him totally out of their lives and was saying crap like she was going to take all his money and he would never see them and then she didn't want paternity tests done on them. Also, he did not get along with his ex at all and she was physically abusive to him. He thought that it was in the best interest of his children at the time, plus his douchebag father told him that it was the right thing to do. He has regretted it since that day because he now sees the other options that were open to him and I think that this is why he has been very conflicted about our having a baby now since he has tortured himself for so many years about giving up his boys.

See, I would say this is a good argument for not having a black and white rule about people who have had rights terminated.

yea but his rights weren't terminated by a judge, he mad the decision. it sucks that some people can be so spiteful and use their kids when their relationship goes bad (like his ex wife). it doesn't mean he was an unfit father to his boys, or be one to his new baby. I was thinking your original post was towards people who had their rights terminated in court (for neglect or something like that)

Yeah, that was what my OP was about, but see this is just an offshoot of a hard rule of 'everyone with rights terminated should have them terminated for future kids'. Terminated rights are terminated rights, whether precipitated by a child in need of care case or voluntarily given up.

shelley1002 · August 2013

I think it depends on the situation.

My nephew's father signed over his rights to his oldest so the mother and daughter could move out of state and have a better life. Due to some circumstance (not sure what it was) she couldn't move without him signing his rights over.

And I agree with the PP on certain situations calling for mandated (is that the right word?) sterilization. My SIL's brother has had 2 kids with his current gf in less than 2 years. Both kids were born addicted to methadone. And I'm not talking about methadone use controlled by a rehab program. Both kids were immediately taken into possession by child services within hours of birth.

AshleighW13 · August 2013

I guess I feel like it depends on the case. Abuse, drugs,sexual stuff, I would have to say yes. But my mom lost custody of me when I was about 8 because she was anorexic and had to go into a program. The school system I went to found out and told the state and it was a huge issue. Thankfully the state allowed my mother to sign her rights over to a family member and I ended up living with my grandmother for a few months until my mom was out of the program. Should she have been told later on that because at one point she was deemed unable to take care of me that she had no right to custody of my sisters when they were born. I don't think so. By then she was well, physically and mentally and she never had problem with eating disorders again.

pandaglitter · August 2013

It depends. For people giving their children up for adoption because they can't afford or support their child, but then get their lives together, I think they should be able to be parents.

My husband's ex hasn't seen her daughter in 3 years. It would take filing a few forms in order to terminate her rights for abandonment. (She hasn't talked to her either). I'm her mom and will adopt her in the future legally. Her mom has an almost one-year-old I think she should parent...I hope she doesn't do what she did to my daughter to this baby, and I doubt she would. I'm sure she regrets it a lot, but at this point it's up to my daughter to decide what relationship she wants with her (when she's older).

Parents who abuse their children or are on drugs shouldn't get to have more children. If they're clean, then they should have a probationary period to verify. Abuse is abuse...it's not fair to the child to be forced into that environment.

KerCo51 · August 2013

I see this very often at work. Since it takes so long to terminate parent's rights and often involves the parent making the same mistakes over and over again, they very often lose the rights to their future children. From what I have seen, the system tries very hard to keep the children with their biological parents. I have very mixed feelings about this. I see a lot of parents who do not deserve to keep their children, but then their children go to foster homes that are just as bad. There are some amazing and beautiful foster parents out there, but there are also many who do it for all the wrong reasons.

Lee81 · August 2013

shelley1002 said:
I think it depends on the situation.

My nephew's father signed over his rights to his oldest so the mother and daughter could move out of state and have a better life. Due to some circumstance (not sure what it was) she couldn't move without him signing his rights over.

I don't understand how this could possibly have been his only option. I know that there are some seemingly ridiculous cases involving custody and child support but I find this very hard to believe. I would be very curious to know what kind of circumstance could make this possible.

shelley1002 · August 2013

Lee81 said:

shelley1002 said:
I think it depends on the situation.

My nephew's father signed over his rights to his oldest so the mother and daughter could move out of state and have a better life. Due to some circumstance (not sure what it was) she couldn't move without him signing his rights over.
I don't understand how this could possibly have been his only option. I know that there are some seemingly ridiculous cases involving custody and child support but I find this very hard to believe. I would be very curious to know what kind of circumstance could make this possible.

I have no idea what the circumstances were. I don't have contact with him to find out either.

Wino0920 · August 2013

@btimes I just watched a movie and read an article about a case like that one. A famous basketball player who was black cheated on his wife with a white woman and they had a son. He sued her for full custody cause he thought the boy should be raised black cause he looked more black. The case was in Canada and the courts agreed with the basketball player. Eventually the mother took it to the supreme courts and won but seriously? Dumbest shit ever'

I'm sorry to hear your stories as well. It's just not right!!

Lee81 · August 2013

shelley1002 said:

Lee81 said:

shelley1002 said:
I think it depends on the situation.

My nephew's father signed over his rights to his oldest so the mother and daughter could move out of state and have a better life. Due to some circumstance (not sure what it was) she couldn't move without him signing his rights over.
I don't understand how this could possibly have been his only option. I know that there are some seemingly ridiculous cases involving custody and child support but I find this very hard to believe. I would be very curious to know what kind of circumstance could make this possible.
I have no idea what the circumstances were. I don't have contact with him to find out either.

I wasn't really expecting an answer. Even if you did have contact with him, i wouldn't think you'd be willing to ask nosy questions about a potentially painful subject just because a stranger on the internet wants to know

I'm just super curious how that could possibly be real. It sounds like something i saw in tv once and it seemed equally unbelievable then.

Chrisanna0508 · August 2013

Wino0920 said:

@btimes I just watched a movie and read an article about a case like that one. A famous basketball player who was black cheated on his wife with a white woman and they had a son. He sued her for full custody cause he thought the boy should be raised black cause he looked more black. The case was in Canada and the courts agreed with the basketball player. Eventually the mother took it to the supreme courts and won but seriously? Dumbest shit ever' I'm sorry to hear your stories as well. It's just not right!!

I've seen that movie on Lifetime Network. Some of those movies can suck you in like crack so I avoid that channel at all costs.

Wino0920 · August 2013

Chrisanna0508 said:

Wino0920 said:

@btimes I just watched a movie and read an article about a case like that one. A famous basketball player who was black cheated on his wife with a white woman and they had a son. He sued her for full custody cause he thought the boy should be raised black cause he looked more black. The case was in Canada and the courts agreed with the basketball player. Eventually the mother took it to the supreme courts and won but seriously? Dumbest shit ever'

I'm sorry to hear your stories as well. It's just not right!!

I've seen that movie on Lifetime Network. Some of those movies can suck you in like crack so I avoid that channel at all costs.

I love my lifetime!!!

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