Separation Anxiety is killing me :(

pb_bride · July 2013

M will be 9 months next week. We've sleep-trained and nap-trained, and he's been a great napper and great sleeper for months now.

For naps, he'll fall asleep within 5-10 minutes after I put him down awake. He usually does protest cry a little but once he's asleep, he takes 2 naps a day, each lasting 1.5-2 hrs (for total of 3.5-4 hrs a day). He STTN.

Since yesterday, the naps are worse than a nightmare. He's not sick, not teething. We've done the exact same nap routine and I've followed his usual sleepy cues.

Yesterday's morning nap (at 10a) ended up with him crying and screaming for 50 minutes. I went in 2x to soothe him but he just kept crying. He'd fall asleep for 3 minutes then wakes up and screams again. I had to abort the nap after 50 minutes of this, and he ended up taking his nap at 12 noon (5 hrs after waking up in the AM). He did nap for 2.5hrs. The afternoon nap was another screamfest and I had to abort that too. So he only had one single nap all day with 5 hrs of awake time in the AM and in the PM.

Today he's taken 2 short naps (50 mins each) with crying for 15-20 minutes before falling asleep. He's been up since 1:50pm and it's now 5:20pm. I can't get him take his 3rd nap even though he's exhausted. He's screaming his head off. Every time I go into his room, he stops crying, and tries to grab my leg through the slats. When I pick him up, he calms down but screaming resumes as soon as I put him down. The crying/screaming is absolutely killing me.

How long is this going to last??? Seriously this is 100x worse than sleep training.

TJ1979 · July 2013

Oh no. Poor M and poor pb. I wonder if there is something going on at that age. I think 9 months was really rough with E, and that's what finally prompted us to sleep train. I wish I had done advice for you. Whatever it is, I hope it passes really soon. Hugs!

jessica_gail2 · July 2013

So sorry PB. :-( We're not there in age yet so I have no advice but I hope M is back to his normal sleep routine ASAP!

jesselayne8 · July 2013

DD dropped down to one nap a day at 9 months. I tried really hard to keep 2 naps a day but like you I had to keep aborting naps. I finally gave in to one nap a day. Usually ends up being 2hrs but sometimes can be up to 3hrs.

Also we have had to sleep train over again every 6-8wks. It usually takes 2 days to get her back on track.

Ruthie04 · July 2013

They say there is a big sleep regression between 8-10 mos because of all of the developmental milestones that occur during that period and DS2 is going through it in spades! Their little brains are just working overtime. He is also insanely attached to me and has moments when all he wants to do is stare at me through the crib slats. Just last night, he was screaming for me and only me (he says mama). Between teething, reflux med adjustments, milestones, and typical regressions, he's had back to back issues with only a week or two in between. CIO doesn't make a bit of a difference, so I can only assume something is going on in that little head of his.

So sorry for the frustration. DS2 is 10 months and has been in the throws of this for weeks. It sucks

:-O

pb_bride · July 2013

jesselayne8 said:

DD dropped down to one nap a day at 9 months. I tried really hard to keep 2 naps a day but like you I had to keep aborting naps. I finally gave in to one nap a day. Usually ends up being 2hrs but sometimes can be up to 3hrs. Also we have had to sleep train over again every 6-8wks. It usually takes 2 days to get her back on track.

How do you redo the sleep training? I had gone back in to soothe M but I honestly don't think it helps one way or the other. His crying simply gets more hysterical as time goes on. When I go in, he'll calm down a bit but the hysterical crying starts as soon as I step away. It is absolutely torture to hear him cry like this. I can't imagine M dropping down to 1 nap so soon. He just dropped his 3rd nap a month ago.

pb_bride · July 2013

Ruthie04 said:

They say there is a big sleep regression between 8-10 mos because of all of the developmental milestones that occur during that period and DS2 is going through it in spades! Their little brains are just working overtime. He is also insanely attached to me and has moments when all he wants to do is stare at me through the crib slats. Just last night, he was screaming for me and only me (he says mama). Between teething, reflux med adjustments, milestones, and typical regressions, he's had back to back issues with only a week or two in between. CIO doesn't make a bit of a difference, so I can only assume something is going on in that little head of his.
So sorry for the frustration. DS2 is 10 months and has been in the throws of this for weeks. It sucks
:-O

Ruthie, thanks for your reply. Sorry to see that you're going thru the and thing! Hope your DS2 gets back on sleep track soon. M is so clingy these days it's unbelievable. He'll crawl a mile to be with me, but once I'm holding him, he'll writhe nonstop and I'm so afraid I'll drop him. Ugh, life's tough being a baby!

Ruthie04 · July 2013

pb_bride said:

Ruthie04 said:

They say there is a big sleep regression between 8-10 mos because of all of the developmental milestones that occur during that period and DS2 is going through it in spades! Their little brains are just working overtime. He is also insanely attached to me and has moments when all he wants to do is stare at me through the crib slats. Just last night, he was screaming for me and only me (he says mama). Between teething, reflux med adjustments, milestones, and typical regressions, he's had back to back issues with only a week or two in between. CIO doesn't make a bit of a difference, so I can only assume something is going on in that little head of his.
So sorry for the frustration. DS2 is 10 months and has been in the throws of this for weeks. It sucks
:-O

Ruthie, thanks for your reply. Sorry to see that you're going thru the and thing! Hope your DS2 gets back on sleep track soon. M is so clingy these days it's unbelievable. He'll crawl a mile to be with me, but once I'm holding him, he'll writhe nonstop and I'm so afraid I'll drop him. Ugh, life's tough being a baby!

Your description of M sounds so like my boys!! Yesterday, I was trying to keep one from escaping the Ergo while the other was trying to jump out of the cart to get to me in the Target frozen foods section. Poor babes. I can only imagine how frustrating it is for them to be going through all of this drama. Hope little M figures out whatever he's going through and that you guys get some rest.

queenbone · July 2013

It might be time to drop one of the naps. I don't know where my Ferber book is at the moment, but he has a chart in there for how many hrs a day a child needs based on age. It might be time to transition down. (It does suck for Momma to lose a nap though!)

Dragonfly1226 · July 2013

I would give it a few more days. Is he just learning to pull himself to a stand? When they go through big milestones it messes with sleep. If he keeps doing the same thing for a week or so maybe it is time to consider dropping the morning nap.

mdiblasi10 · July 2013

We went through the same thing around that age. We cut down his naps to one, maybe two, a day around that time because he would refuse to nap. I would give it 15 minutes and if he wouldn't sleep, I would quit trying and let him stay up until he was tired enough to fall asleep. Not sure if that's a good solution, but it worked for us. He is down to one nap per day at one year and it's usually 2 to 3 hours. Good luck getting through this rough patch! It does get better

pb_bride · July 2013

Thanks for all your advice and understanding! I wish I don't get frustrated so easily... but 2 days of nonstop screaming cries really got to me!

Today is a better day so far... knock on wood... He went down for his first nap without much of a fight (except that it takes longer for him to fall asleep than usual), and he's been asleep for 1hr45m so far.

He doesn't have a major milestone right now, though each day he's doing a little more than the day before. But he hasn't figured out how to pull himself up or stand yet.

mcgeeva · July 2013

We cut down to two naps a day by then. And when he turned one he went down to one long nap at daycare. Good luck

Separation Anxiety is killing me :(

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