Bed-Sharing with a Newborn (C&P from 2nd Tri)

TheSloppySwish · July 2013

From the 2nd Tri board. Further down in the thread a debate erupts over whether it's safe to bed-share with a newborn:

https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12008879/where-do-newborns-sleep-so-many-questions#latest

So this is a debatable issue now? Maybe I'm just a stickler for rules, but when my OB, pediatrician, hospital, the AAP and Mayo Clinic all site bed-sharing as a SIDS risk, I don't consider it an option.

SoMoNY · July 2013

AAP, OB and others used to advocate for formula over BM and now they say the opposite.

They used to say put baby to sleep on tummy but now they say the opposite

You get my point, what they say is never set in stone

TheSloppySwish · July 2013

SoMoNY said:

AAP, OB and others used to advocate for formula over BM and now they say the opposite.

They used to say put baby to sleep on tummy but now they say the opposite

You get my point, what they say is never set in stone

True point.

kittyh8r · July 2013

I guess I don't understand debating something that doesn't affect you. When we had Emma, I said no way to bed sharing because I didn't want to fight her when it was time to put her in her own room. Now that I know how I sleep with a newborn in the room, I know that we could handle it while I am trying to get passed all the BF difficulties. If you know you sleep really sound, then don't bed share. WHO CARES WHAT I DO!?

TheSloppySwish · July 2013

EmmaBoBemma said:

I guess I don't understand debating something that doesn't affect you. When we had Emma, I said no way to bed sharing because I didn't want to fight her when it was time to put her in her own room. Now that I know how I sleep with a newborn in the room, I know that we could handle it while I am trying to get passed all the BF difficulties. If you know you sleep really sound, then don't bed share. WHO CARES WHAT I DO!?

Meh. . there's a conversation at least once a week about crib bumpers. Stuff like this gets discussed all the time on this board. Doesn't necessarily have to be a debate.

TheSloppySwish · July 2013

ColeRose said:

@EmmaBoBemma maybe OP is just looking to see what others are doing, reasons for co-sleeping, etc.

Indeed. Sorry if that wasn't clear.

pink flamingo · July 2013

TheSloppySwish said:

SoMoNY said:

AAP, OB and others used to advocate for formula over BM and now they say the opposite.

They used to say put baby to sleep on tummy but now they say the opposite

You get my point, what they say is never set in stone

True point.
. Yeah but as with anything like that more research comes in and better studies have more proof. It's called medicine and the human body stuff is never set in stone. New technology evolves helping retrieve new information. So why wouldn't you believe the new research ? It's not like there trying to hurt your child. This information is always there to help and advice you. Plus the topic is sleeping in bed with a newborn. Common sense would tell you that might not be a good idea.

kittyh8r · July 2013

ColeRose said:

@EmmaBoBemma maybe OP is just looking to see what others are doing, reasons for co-sleeping, etc.

I guess I should have specified me frustrations. They weren't directed at the OP. They were directed at the people who feel the need to debate with me, or tell me it's wrong to bed share or use bumpers. haha

Sorry OP if it seemed like I was getting pissy with you. (:

SoMoNY · July 2013

pink flamingo said:

SoMoNY said:

AAP, OB and others used to advocate for formula over BM and now they say the opposite.

They used to say put baby to sleep on tummy but now they say the opposite

You get my point, what they say is never set in stone

True point.
. Yeah but as with anything like that more research comes in and better studies have more proof. It's called medicine and the human body stuff is never set in stone. New technology evolves helping retrieve new information. So why wouldn't you believe the new research ? It's not like there trying to hurt your child. This information is always there to help and advice you. Plus the topic is sleeping in bed with a newborn. Common sense would tell you that might not be a good idea.

I'm sure they had new research that told them formula was better than breast at some point...

What is new today is old tomorrow

MamaGrillo · July 2013

Like most parenting decisions/ styles, to each their own..... responsibly.

okate0213 · July 2013

Meh, I bedshared with my infants up into babyhood. I feel that it was safe in a way, based on some research I did. Dr. Sears has done extensive research into it. This is a good link https://www.askdrsears.com/news/latest-news/dr-sears-addresses-recent-co-sleeping-concerns I was also once upon a mom that said I would NEVER bedshare! Lol

molisar · July 2013

It's really funny to see "hot topics" as your fetus, and then little one gets older. Bumpers, where your car seat faces, vaccines, co-sleeping, and so many other topics will always generate huge discussions.

With respect to co-sleeping, I never thought I'd do it. But, alas, DS had major reflux and the only way to get him to fall asleep was on his stomach. Because of the dangers of SIDS with a baby sleeping on their stomach, he'd fall asleep on top of me for an hour or so (yes, in our bed) and then we'd transfer him into the crib. Yes, some nights I just got too d@mn tired to put in him the crib so he'd sleep with us for awhile. I think it's great that people have opinions on how they want to raise their child. But it's just that. Opinions and reality differ greatly most of the time.

backoffunicorn · July 2013

I think everyone has to research it on their own and come to their own conclusion. For me, co-sleeping isn't an option. Just last night I got hit in the back by DH with his elbow (not hard luckily). He has really bad nightmares and starts screaming and flailing around so I'd be scared that he'd hit the baby.

TheSloppySwish · July 2013

okate0213 said:

Meh, I bedshared with my infants up into babyhood. I feel that it was safe in a way, based on some research I did. Dr. Sears has done extensive research into it. This is a good link https://www.askdrsears.com/news/latest-news/dr-sears-addresses-recent-co-sleeping-concerns I was also once upon a mom that said I would NEVER bedshare! Lol

I love this tip from the article:

"Do not allow anyone but mother to sleep next to the baby, since only mothers have that protective awareness of baby. Place baby between mother and a guardrail, not between mother and father. Father should sleep on the other side of mother."

Although I didn't bed-share with my DD, the first few weeks I was CONSTANTLY waking up in a panic and frantically searching the sheets, thinking I'd fallen asleep holding her in bed. My "protective awareness" would be out of control if I actually let an infant bed-share with me.

iranwithscissors · July 2013

I slept with both boys, and plan to do so with this one. It's much easier for me as a breastfeeding mom to have baby right next to me, but I respect everyone's decision on weather to co-sleep or not, and would hope that I would never be flamed for my decision on the matter. I don't believe any parent who decides to co-sleep is intentionally trying to hurt their baby.

I agree that there are many things I was SURE I would or wouldn't do with baby as a FTM and sometimes out of desperation, you change your mind. My advice to everyone is be open minded and don't be so quick to judge anyone who doesn't parent like you. They aren't raising your child.

TheSloppySwish · July 2013

hercules03 said:

We have bedshared until at least age three with the first two and will with this one, again. Judge away. It's all good. I silently judge formula feeders, people who don't keep their kids rear facing until at least age two, people who circumcise (outside of religious reasons), people who use the CIO method... So trust me, the holier than thou attitude is ridiculous because you are going to do all sorts of shizzit that other peopl think is ridiculously unsafe... Best to learn to keep your trap shut now.

I don't think anyone has been overtly judgy with their comments here. It is possible to discuss these topics without being judgemental or defensive. Or telling anyone to "keep their trap shut."

blainethetrain · July 2013

I think that it's much easier for experts to make the blanket statement "don't do this" than it is to say "it's safe if you do this, this, this and this"

FWIW my friend is an EMT, and he says he's never seen a case of a mom rolling over onto her kid where the mom wasn't drunk, or on some kind of medication/drugs. That's not to say it doesn't happen, but I would be interested to see that statistic.

TheSloppySwish · July 2013

Cashingn2 said:

TheSloppySwish said:

hercules03 said:

We have bedshared until at least age three with the first two and will with this one, again. Judge away. It's all good. I silently judge formula feeders, people who don't keep their kids rear facing until at least age two, people who circumcise (outside of religious reasons), people who use the CIO method... So trust me, the holier than thou attitude is ridiculous because you are going to do all sorts of shizzit that other peopl think is ridiculously unsafe... Best to learn to keep your trap shut now.
I don't think anyone has been overtly judgy with their comments here. It is possible to discuss these topics without being judgemental or defensive. Or telling anyone to "keep their trap shut."

Have you met hercules? She's notorious for those sorts of comments. And, apparently she's very judgemental.

But she's learned to keep her trap shut . . . unless you're talking about formula feeding, front-facing car seats, circumcision or CIO, in which case f**k you, apparently.

zou bisou · July 2013

hercules03 said:

We have bedshared until at least age three with the first two and will with this one, again. Judge away. It's all good. I silently judge formula feeders, people who don't keep their kids rear facing until at least age two, people who circumcise (outside of religious reasons), people who use the CIO method... So trust me, the holier than thou attitude is ridiculous because you are going to do all sorts of shizzit that other peopl think is ridiculously unsafe... Best to learn to keep your trap shut now.

Hercules03 is probably not aware she comes off as "holier than thou" in a lot of her posts. I realize it's strange to quote her and not talk directly to her. But I noticed she does not respond when she's taken to task about her own offensive statements. Cole, this is where you remind everyone of her "horse kick to the ute" comment.

TheSloppySwish · July 2013

hckygrl909 said:

I think that it's much easier for experts to make the blanket statement "don't do this" than it is to say "it's safe if you do this, this, this and this" FWIW my friend is an EMT, and he says he's never seen a case of a mom rolling over onto her kid where the mom wasn't drunk, or on some kind of medication/drugs. That's not to say it doesn't happen, but I would be interested to see that statistic.

Agree. It's obvious that some of the parenting safety literature has to cater to the lowest common denominator. Unforunately there are a lot of stupid people who have kids and do stupid things with them.

zou bisou · July 2013

SoMoNY said:

AAP, OB and others used to advocate for formula over BM and now they say the opposite.

They used to say put baby to sleep on tummy but now they say the opposite

You get my point, what they say is never set in stone

But this logic stops somewhere right? At some point, you do have to look at the best medical evidence available and make a decision. It might be disproven later on or it could be verified. But it's not a reason to toss all the medical evidence out.

Speaking of, maybe we could link some to support some of the pro/con opinions about sleeping in bed with babies.

MEP923 · July 2013

hercules03 said:
We have bedshared until at least age three with the first two and will with this one, again. Judge away. It's all good. I silently judge formula feeders, people who don't keep their kids rear facing until at least age two, people who circumcise (outside of religious reasons), people who use the CIO method... So trust me, the holier than thou attitude is ridiculous because you are going to do all sorts of shizzit that other peopl think is ridiculously unsafe... Best to learn to keep your trap shut now.

Wait am I reading this right? You judge formula feeders, and all your other ridiculous rants? Please tell me I am taking this out of context

And I don't judge co-sleeping. I did with DS for 2 months and I loved it. I wrote in my other post that DH's cousin lost a baby by rolling over and she was not drunk or on any medication. It was an accident and it happens. I don't think she had any cosleepers or anything. I know moms want to believe there is no risk there but there is. Just make sure you take proper precautions and you will be fine.

kittyh8r · July 2013

Dang it...this was supposed to be a quote. Eff. Well, I will fix it in a different post.

MEP923 · July 2013

gwinnygirl said:
Oh, we've moved on to judging formula feeders? Okay, well kindly fuck off then, @hercules03.

Yea for reals. Let me stand up for every PCOS girl and say not everyone physically can breast feed.

BebeMakesThree · July 2013

Eh I have co slept with my son for two years now and it is just what feels natural to us. He had been EBF for 6 months. Cosleeping made that possible. The nighttime awakenings every 2-3 hours are hard, and co sleeping is just what worked for us.

I would like to point out that SIDS and suffocation are not the same thing. Telling me a story about how your friends baby died of SIDS because someone rolled over on them is not sids. SIDS is sudden unexplained infant death not suffocation. SIDS can happen in the crib, in the carseat or anywhere.

Also, there are numerous studies that state cosleeping can be done safely and increases bonding and encourages the breastfeeding relationship. Dr sears is a great resource. Another sleep study by the university of ND is very interesting. Ill see if I can find it.

Lastly, babies sleeping in only cribs or bassinets is American culture. I visited Africa and the women there laughed that we put our babies in cages. I'm just saying, it's not only a parenting style but also a cultural norm in other countries.

If its not for you then so be it. If you want to try it I suggest doing some research on safe cosleeping.

kittyh8r · July 2013

GWeiners said:

We have bedshared until at least age three with the first two and will with this one, again. Judge away. It's all good. I silently judge formula feeders, people who don't keep their kids rear facing until at least age two, people who circumcise (outside of religious reasons), people who use the CIO method... So trust me, the holier than thou attitude is ridiculous because you are going to do all sorts of shizzit that other peopl think is ridiculously unsafe... Best to learn to keep your trap shut now.
You completely contradict yourself in the above statement. Do you openly judge others or do you keep your "trap" shut and judge silently? I mean no one was even remotely judgmental here, only you.

Right? This is so funny to me. I know that when my daughter was a couple weeks old, if someone would have openly judged me for bottle feeding(breast milk) I would have drop kicked their face. I got a lot of side eyes when I would pull a bottle out because they didn't know it was breast milk. Eh, they all side eye anyways if you NIP, because that's just gross *eye roll*.

I am glad we have finally met the perfect mom. You not have had any trouble BF. And your child must not have gotten car sick. How is it up there on your high horse?

lifesaverz · July 2013

OP, I'm surprised so many people still consider it despite the obvious safety risks as well. And I'm not talking about the occasional time or for an hour here & there type of thing, but more of people who consider bed-sharing full-time. It's not that I super-judge their decision either (to each, their own) but I guess I'm surprised people even consider it as much as they do, with all the risk involved, & the recommendations against it. Now, side-sleepers next to the bed, obviously that's different. I guess I just hope for people that do decide to do it that they seriously consider the safety aspects. I'm not sure how much you can really prevent in that type of situation, but I guess if you're doing your best to avoid risks then that's what counts.

KateVA · July 2013

Going ahead and ignoring the stupid sh!t above but back to the original topic... In my years on the bump, I would say 90% of FTMs say never or at least don't plan to co-sleep. Then you have a baby. And it won't sleep. Or it has a cold. Or it's 3am and you don't give a f@ck anymore and just want to sleep. Almost everyone will do some form of co sleeping at some point. It's best to educate yourself on the safest way to do it just in case. I.e. no comforters or pillows, no alcohol, and the baby goes on the edge with mom in the middle. Dads generally don't have that instinctive light sleeping that moms.

MsCat19 · July 2013

I still bedshare with my 15 month old. I can tell you a huge part of my success with breastfeeding is due to this. I have yet to decide if she will move out into her own bed or we'll be moving into family bed turf. I've done my research, and I have made informed decisions. I kind of resent that others are labeling people like me as ignorant essentially. Chances are I've done more research and handled more anecdotal evidence then you realize.

utlawgirl · July 2013

MamaGrillo said:

Like most parenting decisions/ styles, to each their own..... responsibly.

This. Bed sharing can be safe, if you understand the risks and take the proper precautions.

KFiori1 · July 2013

KateVA said:

Going ahead and ignoring the stupid sh!t above but back to the original topic... In my years on the bump, I would say 90% of FTMs say never or at least don't plan to co-sleep. Then you have a baby. And it won't sleep. Or it has a cold. Or it's 3am and you don't give a f@ck anymore and just want to sleep. Almost everyone will do some form of co sleeping at some point. It's best to educate yourself on the safest way to do it just in case. I.e. no comforters or pillows, no alcohol, and the baby goes on the edge with mom in the middle. Dads generally don't have that instinctive light sleeping that moms.

I agree. There were many things I said I would never do when I was a FTM. Co-sleeping was one. We didn't do it long, but we did it the first few weeks with both kids, just to make it through! I have learned to never have any plans set in stone when it comes to newborns. People ask me where this baby will start off sleeping. Crib, with us, bassinet? Hell if I know! I will play it by ear and do what works best for us, and do what we need to do to survive those CRAZY first few weeks/months!

Jen4033 · July 2013

I added this to the post on 2nd tri but wanted to add it here too. I can add here though that while most agree that "breast is best" Formula is NOT rat poison either. Anyone making a parent feel bad for using formula is just a bad person with no sense of sisterhood IMO.

[<Quote:] mommy grams said:

As I said its very westernized practice to not co-sleep. If done safely it helps infants to sleep. Here's a website that shows both sides as well as how to co-sleep safely. https://m.kidshealth.org/parent/general/sleep/cosleeping.html

Here's an excerpt:

Why Do Some People Choose to Cosleep?

Cosleeping supporters believe — and some studies support their beliefs — that cosleeping: encourages breastfeeding by making nighttime breastfeeding more convenient makes it easier for a nursing mother to get her sleep cycle in sync with her baby's helps babies fall asleep more easily, especially during their first few months and when they wake up in the middle of the night helps babies get more nighttime sleep (because they awaken more frequently with shorter duration of feeds, which can add up to a greater amount of sleep throughout the night) helps parents who are separated from their babies during the day regain the closeness with their infant that they feel they missed But can cosleeping cause SIDS? The connection between cosleeping and SIDS is unclear and research is ongoing. Some cosleeping researchers have suggested that it can reduce the risk of SIDS because cosleeping parents and babies tend to wake up more often throughout the night. It goes on to state how co-sleeping can cause issues with SIDS as well. [/Quote:>]

I just want to comment on this part. While I am not arguing the validity that this is true for some, I'd like to say it is not the only way to achieve this with your LO. DS was in his crib from day 1. The only time we ever co-slept was for an occasional nap or when he was ill & he couldn't sleep with me away from him.

Even though we never co-slept, we never had issues with any of these things. DS was breastfed til he self weaned around 13 mo. He was always an awesome sleeper since birth & he started STTN around 4 mo old & has been since then (he's 19 mo now) with the inevitable bad nights here & there. I tried waking him every 2 hours as a newborn, but he would not have it. I ended up giving up on that after the first few weeks. He always let me know what he wanted/needed.

So - while I'm not against co-sleeping (when done properly as PP said) I want to point out that if you choose NOT to co-sleep, it doesn't mean you will not have a bond with your child. it doesn't mean you will have issues breastfeeding. it doesn't mean everything will be harder on you since you are NOT doing it.

I've been rubbed the wrong way by people I know IRL because I don't follow every single idea/aspect of attachment parenting. So this is why I just had to throw this out there.

snickersforeveryone · July 2013

The nurses at the hospital would freak out if I nodded off while holding Emily after she was born. I took that mindset home with me and was terrified of cosleeping. Unfortunately, like PP said, Emily had really bad reflux. She would NOT sleep laying down. Finally I got desperate enough to cosleep.
You think you know what you want to do with your kids, but you have to remember that each family is different. A PP said that her husband flails about while sleeping. She knows cosleeping is dangerous for them. I'm a super light sleeper and I'd wake as soon as I felt her moving or if she slipped down at all.
That being said, I think if my next kid is like that, I'll invest in a rock n play and see if that works. A lot of women on my BMB back then swore by them.

utlawgirl · July 2013

Jen4033 said:

I added this to the post on 2nd tri but wanted to add it here too. I can add here though that while most agree that "breast is best" Formula is NOT rat poison either. Anyone making a parent feel bad for using formula is just a bad person with no sense of sisterhood IMO.
[<Quote:] mommy grams said:
As I said its very westernized practice to not co-sleep. If done safely it helps infants to sleep. Here's a website that shows both sides as well as how to co-sleep safely. https://m.kidshealth.org/parent/general/sleep/cosleeping.html
Here's an excerpt:
Why Do Some People Choose to Cosleep?
Cosleeping supporters believe — and some studies support their beliefs — that cosleeping: encourages breastfeeding by making nighttime breastfeeding more convenient makes it easier for a nursing mother to get her sleep cycle in sync with her baby's helps babies fall asleep more easily, especially during their first few months and when they wake up in the middle of the night helps babies get more nighttime sleep (because they awaken more frequently with shorter duration of feeds, which can add up to a greater amount of sleep throughout the night) helps parents who are separated from their babies during the day regain the closeness with their infant that they feel they missed But can cosleeping cause SIDS? The connection between cosleeping and SIDS is unclear and research is ongoing. Some cosleeping researchers have suggested that it can reduce the risk of SIDS because cosleeping parents and babies tend to wake up more often throughout the night. It goes on to state how co-sleeping can cause issues with SIDS as well. [/Quote:>]
I just want to comment on this part. While I am not arguing the validity that this is true for some, I'd like to say it is not the only way to achieve this with your LO. DS was in his crib from day 1. The only time we ever co-slept was for an occasional nap or when he was ill & he couldn't sleep with me away from him.
Even though we never co-slept, we never had issues with any of these things. DS was breastfed til he self weaned around 13 mo. He was always an awesome sleeper since birth & he started STTN around 4 mo old & has been since then (he's 19 mo now) with the inevitable bad nights here & there. I tried waking him every 2 hours as a newborn, but he would not have it. I ended up giving up on that after the first few weeks. He always let me know what he wanted/needed.
So - while I'm not against co-sleeping (when done properly as PP said) I want to point out that if you choose NOT to co-sleep, it doesn't mean you will not have a bond with your child. it doesn't mean you will have issues breastfeeding. it doesn't mean everything will be harder on you since you are NOT doing it.
I've been rubbed the wrong way by people I know IRL because I don't follow every single idea/aspect of attachment parenting. So this is why I just had to throw this out there.

Completely agree. While we did co-sleep for the first few weeks, DD was in her crib in her own room by 3 weeks b/c that was what worked best for all of us, and what got us all the best sleep. We were still successful at BFing until 16 months.

So, yes, it can help with BFing in some cases, but it doesn't mean it is the only choice to make that will promote successful BFing.

snickersforeveryone · July 2013

Oh, and @hercules03, as a woman who had to switch to formula feeding, I want to remind you that judging another mom on something like that is pretty twatty. You don't know the circumstances. The mom might be on medication that prohibits BFing, the child may need the extra calories that formula provides, the mom may not produce enough milk or BFing might be too painful. Hell, the mom may just want to avoid BFing completely. It's HER choice. You have no right to judge. I was sad that I couldn't BF. I felt like a bad mom. On top of that, women like you were giving me the side eye whenever I pulled out a bottle...or worse, making comments about it.
So here's a giant middle finger to you and all the other sanctimommies. My child was fed and is thriving. That's what matters.

Oh, and we will be circumcising my son. And we used and will use SleepEasy, a modified version of CIO. Guess you get to "silently" judge that too, oh Madam Holier Than Thou.

willowprincess · July 2013

I bedshared with my other two kids and probably will with this one as well. With my first I was adamant that I would never allow children in our bed. Well she woke up to eat every single hour. I would only have 30 minutes in between feedings. It was more dangerous for me to be sitting up with her somewhere because I was too tired to function and was close to dropping her or other such situations. So I brought her in bed with us, and we all slept better.

My second baby would not sleep unless held, especially once he started treatments for his clubbed foot.

My husband and I are both very aware of them when they are in our bed.

tyedyeme12 · July 2013

As a FTM, it's killing me trying to figure out what is best for LO. I keep hearing "this is safe, this is not safe...but only when..." Like the bumpers from earlier...I don't want LO to get his arms or legs stuck or bump his head, and I feel like if we tied the bumper tight enough, there wouldn't be a problem...but then I read something else and it's still super dangerous. I just want him to be safe, and I feel like there's going to be controversy with everything I do, no matter what.

kittyh8r · July 2013

hercules03 said:

Blah blah blah. The point is, feel free to judge bedsharers but know that people will judge you, too. And the rear facing until 24 months is soon to be law. And yes I know mommies who couldn't bf. that was not directed to them. The mommies who do it to protect their boobs or some other random bs answer... Lame. Just like Hollywood moms who choose a c-s for the ability to time it out and coincide a tummy tuck. Lame. Stepping off my throne.

You are a peach. I have recently found out that in my state children just need to be in a car seat, they don't need to be RF. a 6 month old can be FF as long as they're in a car seat. I found that out b/c my smart SIL turned her 9 month old around and I was looking up laws and found that gem.

What might be lame to you, may be really important to someone else. Just because someone wants to keep their boobs normal, doesn't take anything away from their ability to parent. Let's hope your children don't grow up half as judgmental as you.

SoMoNY · July 2013

MEP923 said:

Oh, we've moved on to judging formula feeders? Okay, well kindly fuck off then, @hercules03.
Yea for reals. Let me stand up for every PCOS girl and say not everyone physically can breast feed.

What does PCOS have to do with BF? I never heard of a link.

PCOS over here and BF for 14 months till he one day decided no more and slapped it away

TheSloppySwish · July 2013

eafogel said:

The nurses at the hospital would freak out if I nodded off while holding Emily after she was born. I took that mindset home with me and was terrified of cosleeping. Unfortunately, like PP said, Emily had really bad reflux. She would NOT sleep laying down. Finally I got desperate enough to cosleep.
You think you know what you want to do with your kids, but you have to remember that each family is different. A PP said that her husband flails about while sleeping. She knows cosleeping is dangerous for them. I'm a super light sleeper and I'd wake as soon as I felt her moving or if she slipped down at all.
That being said, I think if my next kid is like that, I'll invest in a rock n play and see if that works. A lot of women on my BMB back then swore by them.

This is basically how I felt, too. When DD was born, and in the course of this pregnancy, every medical professional and establishment involved with my or DD's care has said DO NOT BED-SHARE. Hence my genuine surprise to see it dicussed this way on TB.

While I'm certainly an independent thinker and researcher, I honestly took "no co-sleeping" to be right up there with "put to sleep on back."

Nonetheless, this is a very interesting discussion and I appreciate all the ladies who thoughtfully and respectfully added their opinions.

MEP923 · July 2013

SoMoNY said:

MEP923 said:

Oh, we've moved on to judging formula feeders? Okay, well kindly fuck off then, @hercules03.
Yea for reals. Let me stand up for every PCOS girl and say not everyone physically can breast feed.

What does PCOS have to do with BF? I never heard of a link.

PCOS over here and BF for 14 months till he one day decided no more and slapped it away

I couldn't breastfeed and I have PCOS. I didn't know it at the time. When I got the diagnosis the new OBGYN and my fertility doc bought up the link. Now that I am pregnant I started doing research. You have about a 33 percent success rate of having a healthy flow with PCOS. Consider yourself lucky that you have had no issues. I may try again this time but I am not getting my hopes up. I tried unmercifully to pump and breastfeed for 5 weeks with DS but it just wasn't happening so I had to stop.

@Hercules03 the annoyance is just by looking at people you can't tell if they have stories like mine. No matter what someone's decision is on this it is right for them and their family. The baby is not going to die because it is on formula so MIND YOUR BUSINESS.

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Bed-Sharing with a Newborn (C&P from 2nd Tri)

Re: Bed-Sharing with a Newborn (C&amp;P from 2nd Tri)

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Re: Bed-Sharing with a Newborn (C&P from 2nd Tri)