Sigh. Baby Sleep Help

KaylaL08 · July 2013

I have been too lazy to fix my siggy, but DS2 will be 5 months on the 6th. I don't know what to do about his sleep. He takes great, fairly consistent naps during the day, usually 3 1-2 hours naps. Night time is a different story. I start getting him ready for bed at about 7:50. He is usually out by 8:15. I nurse him until he is asleep or drowsy on our bed and then put him in the PNP beside the bed. If he is asleep I will hold him upright to wake him up slightly and to burp him so I don't put him down asleep.

On a good night, he will sleep for about 2 hours before he wakes up for the first time, but usually he is crying about 45 mins to an hour later. I usually have to go in and roll him to his side, give him his paci and wait a couple minutes to make sure he is back asleep. This will go on about every 30-45 mins until we go to bed around 10:30 or 11. Once we go to bed when he wakes up I put him in bed with me, where he continues to wake up what seems like every 1-1.5 hours. Now he is even harder to get back to sleep. I used to be able to give him his paci and cuddle him and he would go right back to sleep, now when I do that he bucks and whines and demands the boob.

I know about the 4-month wakeful, but it has been steadily getting WORSE for a month, that, plus the fact that he has never slept even halfway close to "through the night" is making me think I need to do something. Plus he is also starting to wake my husband, who is getting irritated and saying we need to CIO, which I feel he is too young for.

Things I have tried:

Swaddling-helped some when he was younger, but it pretty useless now because he is too big for the swaddle, plus he is an expert roller and I don't feel like it's very safe. It doesn't help much now anyways

White noise machine-Use every night, don't think it makes a difference

Earlier bedtime

Later bedtime

Sleeping in crib-tried a couple of times and he still woke up several times before we went to bed and I was not trudging back and forth across the house 4-6 times a night.

To sleep with and without paci-doesn't make a difference

Nursing to sleep/not nursing to sleep-doesn't make a difference

Ahh I am lost! And need sleep! Advice? Suggestions? Encouragement?

alli2672 · July 2013

could he have reflux?
It kind of popped into my mind when you said that you have to turn him on his side, and he needs to get up to nurse in order to fall back asleep. Maybe some acid is coming up from his belly and causing some pain in his esophagus, and that wakes him up.
I wonder if sleeping in a more upright position rather than flat on his back (I know there are devices that do this), or trying some zantac might help.

KaylaL08 · July 2013

Mermaids&Magic said:

Have you tried bedsharing so you can just BF without having toget totally out of bed. He might just wanna comfort nurse.

We do bedshare. He starts out in his PNP and then winds up in bed with me. That is the only reason why I have stayed sane this long! I don't want to bedshare for the the long haul though and recently he has even started waking my husband up with his whining and fussing. Even though we are bedsharing I still don't want to be woken up every 1-1.5 hours!!

KaylaL08 · July 2013

alli2672 said:

could he have reflux?
It kind of popped into my mind when you said that you have to turn him on his side, and he needs to get up to nurse in order to fall back asleep. Maybe some acid is coming up from his belly and causing some pain in his esophagus, and that wakes him up.
I wonder if sleeping in a more upright position rather than flat on his back (I know there are devices that do this), or trying some zantac might help.

Well he naps in his swing and sleeps great, so I do think he sleeps better more upright. Not sure about the reflux though, would he have shown other signs before now? When he was smaller and I could swaddle him he would sleep on his back no problem.

alli2672 · July 2013

I honestly don't know much about it. It seems like something that could start at any age though.

alli2672 · July 2013

I'm sorry I couldn't be more help

KaylaL08 · July 2013

alli2672 said:

I'm sorry I couldn't be more help

You're fine! Thanks for trying!

mandymack · July 2013

Both my kids flipped over to their tummyies around that age and that's when sleeping (combined with Ferberizing them) really took off! Sounds like he's already liking being on his side... could you put him on his tummy one night and see how it goes?

For what it's worth, 5-7mos is the developmental age when most babies can self-soothe, you just have to let them. When you are ready, you should read about Ferberizing and the various CIO methods just to gain some insight into what they are about, how they are helpful, and decide whether they are right for your family.

GL!

KaylaL08 · July 2013

TobeMrsShavers said:

Both my kids flipped over to their tummyies around that age and that's when sleeping (combined with Ferberizing them) really took off! Sounds like he's already liking being on his side... could you put him on his tummy one night and see how it goes?

For what it's worth, 5-7mos is the developmental age when most babies can self-soothe, you just have to let them. When you are ready, you should read about Ferberizing and the various CIO methods just to gain some insight into what they are about, how they are helpful, and decide whether they are right for your family.

GL!

I have tried putting him on his belly several times and he wakes up screaming. He has been rolling back to belly since 9 weeks, but has never rolled belly to back. Sometimes if I get him in exactly the right position basically his lower half belly down and his upper half slightly to the side he will sleep a little better. I do feel like if he could roll belly to back maybe he wouldn't wake up screaming.

I think I have decided to order the Ferber book, isn't is called Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems? I am not against CIO but I was really hoping to avoid it

.

mandymack · July 2013

Yes, that's the book!
We also love "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Chil" by Weissenbluth.

Stefibeth · July 2013

Honestly, this is unlike anything I've experienced so you'll have to take my advice with a grain of salt.

From what you've said it seems to me that there's sometimes about the nighttime sleep that's not working. Obviously you know he's doing really well for naps and that seems to be what a lot of younger babies struggle with. Good napping typically rolls into decent night sleep (because they're not overtired from struggling with naps all day). With that said, if what you're doing isn't working you definitely need to change it up, it's just what he needs is the hard part to figure out!

A few thoughts:

Is he starting to be disturbed by other people being in the room? At that age DD and DS both started to become more aware of what was going on around them and started to be easily disturbed by when we made noise in the bedroom (like, for example, going to bed, even quietly). We ended up moving DS to his own bed at 7mo and he started sleeping better. I think he was ready for his own, larger space at that point. Something to watch for anyway. I know you mentioned you tried the crib, but if you think this could be it it might be worth it to give it another shot and make sure you give it a few days to see if he adjusts.

I know you said you tried with and without the paci as well, do you think he could be losing it in his sleep and when he rouses from a sleep cycle he needs it to fall back to sleep?

30-45 mins is a sleep cycle so it sounds like something is happening when he starts to come out of it. At the same time 5-6mo is when they're working through a "Wonder Week". The cognitive development that's going on, among other things, lets them understand that you exist even when they don't see you so it's common for babies to stir, realize that mom isn't around, and then have trouble getting back to sleep. That could be the culprit as well.

DD just turned 6mo and the last handful of weeks have been rough for sleep. Not nearly as rough as what you've been dealing with, but relatively rough for her. We should be towards the end of this stuff though so I'm hoping things improve soon!

Nothing else is really coming to mind. If you haven't already I would start by reading (from a handful of sources) about baby sleep so that you know typical sleep patterns, sleep cycles, what sleep looks like at his age, etc. so you have a jumping off point. I wouldn't jump to sleep training before understanding the basics though. But that's JMO!

It's been awhile since I've read Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child and although I don't recall loving it completely I feel like I do remember that book delving into the topic of baby sleep quite a bit. Another option might be No-Cry Sleep Solution.

meglew · July 2013

I don't have any ideas that others haven't mentioned, but more wanted to offer my support/sympathy. Our LO's share a birthday (March 6th). DD2 has never been an awesome sleeper. She is inconsistent at best. She was diagnosed with reflux around 1 month old and once we started her on meds, things have improved a bit. She will lay on her back now without the problems she had before. Sometimes naps are great (3 hours) and sometimes 35-45 minutes. There is absolutely no rhyme or reason to how long or well she will sleep for the day/night. It is quite frustrating. Though not quite as frequent as your little one, for the last couple of weeks her nighttime sleep has been awful, waking every 2 hours. She sleeps in her crib in her room with a fan going for white noise and her arms unswaddled (body only). DD1 was similar around this age, so I am hoping that DD2 snaps out of it soon. At exactly 5 months (to the day), DD1 started sleeping through the night (7:30pm-7:30am). Hoping that DD2 will follow suit is what gets me through the night.

KaylaL08 · July 2013

@Stefibeth Thanks for the lengthy reply! I've done a lot of reading at troublesometots.com and learned a lot about sleep science through that site, and I try to follow those suggestions, but even when I do, he is still waking up! I may try to be more consistent about cutting out the paci. He is not super attached to it, so I don't think it would be too much of an issue to get rid of it. What is puzzling though is that sometimes he does fall asleep without it and it seems to not make a difference!

He has always been a very alert baby as well as a light sleeper--I haven't been able to move him from car to house in his infant seat still sleeping since he was 6 weeks old--so I could see that we could be disturbing him. Maybe I'll try the crib some more, the only reason I haven't tried it more is because I really, really do not love the idea of shuffling in and out of bed all night, but I suppose I could try it for a little while.

I do understand as well about the the "object permanence" thing, but that doesn't explain why he is waking so often when I'm HOLDING him in the bed! So frustrating!

@meglew Thanks so much for the empathy! Glad I'm not alone! Love that our LO's have the same birthday!

@NandaB I honestly do think he would sleep better/longer in the swing at night but I am worried because the swing we have just buckles over his legs and not over his shoulders. I have checked on him and found him SIDEWAYS in the swing. I am really afraid he would topple out! Have you ever done it? Do you think it's safe?

Also the reflux--how would I know? he's never shown any other symptoms and he has slept on his back in the past when he was swaddled with no issue. I thought it was something they were born with that got better when they got older? Can it just pop up whenever?

Also FTR, I would NOT let my 5 month old CIO! My husband says that's what we should do, but no way no how. Not until he is at LEAST 6 months, but I would like to explore other options first. I have heard Ferber's book talks a lot about baby sleep science, so I want to read it for that information. I am not against CIO, but I do feel like he is too young right now!!

Stefibeth · July 2013

Hmm... that's so puzzling. I would say that the frequency with which you're talking about him waking is definitely too frequent for his age, even considering he may be going through some developmental things. Yikes. I sure hope things improve soon, whether it happens on its own or if you figure out something else that will work!

Want a personalized experience?

Sigh. Baby Sleep Help

Re: Sigh. Baby Sleep Help

eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11

eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11

Choose Another Board

Search Boards