Blended Families

court this morning AHHH IN COMPLETE SHOCK!!

Did not go how I expected at all!

BM did not show up.. so they weren't going to have court thinking that BM didn't know about court.. I had proof that she did.. in 3 different phone conversations. BM knew before DH as she got a letter in the mail and well.. this was discussed in another post that TB ate all of my comments on.

The judge didn't ask to see or hear any of my evidence.. the attorney assured the judge that he had seen it before we went in,I'm assuming and that's the only reason the judge went on with court 

DH got what he asked for. supervised visits and a call schedule. Now.. we can get BM for harassment if she (and I'm sure she will) continues the nasty messages on a daily basis.. also discussed in another thread that was eaten.

The judge asked DH who he wanted to appoint as legal guardian of SD's if something were to happen to DH either fatally or to disable him, he of course said me and it was approved by the judge.

 

From the way things went and with BM only seeing SD's once every 3 months, constantly lying to the girls and with everything else.. I honestly don't think the outcome would have been any different even if BM did show up. I am still in shock and can't stop crying.

Thank you all for your advice and listening to my rants. I know it isn't over but this will make it much easier on our whole family, SD's the most for their feelings.. and me for my sanity. lol.

I'm thinking the supervised visits won't last, BM will get sick of them and will have to start paying child support soon.. I see her giving up, this may sound mean but I hope she does.

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   Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers                            

 

My Loves= SD 18 SS 16 SS13 DD13 DS10 SD6 SD5 

Re: court this morning AHHH IN COMPLETE SHOCK!!

  • I was just thinking about you!! I looked at my calendar and realized today was the big day!! I'm so glad to hear that you guys got exactly what you asked for, thats so great! I'm so happy for you!!! 

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  • Thank you so much.. I can't believe it.. we got more than we asked for! We haven't sad anything to SD's about it and probably won't until it a visit is confirmed and BM is about 5 minutes from destination.

    SD's cannot handle anymore let downs and I can't watch them go through it anymore.

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       Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers                            

     

    My Loves= SD 18 SS 16 SS13 DD13 DS10 SD6 SD5 

  • I'm so glad things went well!!
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  • I'm things are finally sorted out.  Hopefully with this new CO things will calm down.  If nothing else, now you at least have some recourse when/if BM continues to harass you.
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  • Congrats!!! That's a huge relief
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  • So glad it went well! Better than ours did. Man, I wish we had your judge and lived where you do. This is an amazing triumph. And the security of guardianship if something happens to your H is a huge plus! Congrats!
  • What a relief! I don't think she'll be happy with the supervised visits either, hopefully she doesn't hassle you guys too much, but try not to stress since you won!
       
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  • Thank you it is such a huge relief.

    I do hope the ridiculous phone calls stop but really don't think they will. Can't have it all. lol

    I am still shocked... the judge even said that they don't do things like that until it has been at least a year since the c/o was put into effect which I already knew.. I think that's what gets me the most.

    DH was very nervous on the stand and got a couple of his facts messed up, making them not sound so bad but I really don't think he had to say as much as he did.. the judge already had his mind made up.. and I know ppl say most judges are still all about the mom... The judge we went in front of is one of those... He has been know to send BM's to rehab and helping with different programs. I don't know what's to come but I just hope it's good.

    My SD's deserve something good in their lives.

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       Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers                            

     

    My Loves= SD 18 SS 16 SS13 DD13 DS10 SD6 SD5 

  • Congratulations, I'm glad that things went well for you.  I don't understand her not showing up, WTF is she thinking? But I'm happy for you that she didn't.
    TTC since 3/2010. Me 41, DH-49. After 3 years, 6 IUIs and several IVFs we have finally have our beautiful baby girl, born on 11/7/13.



  • Thank you.. I was actually really just shocked at the judge.. He asked DH how many times BM has seen SD's and I had given DH a paper with the dates and amount of time as the atty advised. DH didn't have to say anything else.. The judge proceeded to ask what day of the week would be good for him or I to supervise the visit.. what time frame.. length of time and what 2 days and times for phone calls. and when the judge added that they go to me I lost it.

    I'm really not surprised BM didn't show up. even though "the girls are her life" BM hasn't seen SD's in over 3 months, her choice. And even if BM did show up.. I don't think the outcome would have been any different and if it were she wouldn't have gotten as much bc she would have made an a$$ out of herself.

    BM said she is writing to ask for a different judge bc she thinks the judge is prejudice against her. You just go right ahead and do that.. lol. wow. I'm so glad we won't have to deal with her as much.  DH is mad bc they aren't filing FTA on BM. I told him to just let it go..

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       Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers                            

     

    My Loves= SD 18 SS 16 SS13 DD13 DS10 SD6 SD5 

  • ambrvan said:
    So glad it went well! Better than ours did. Man, I wish we had your judge and lived where you do. This is an amazing triumph. And the security of guardianship if something happens to your H is a huge plus! Congrats!
    Thank you.. I'm not sure why I'm not getting the comments in order.. lol.
    The judge we went in front of is really a tough one. I'm still in awe. He didn't seem very happy about his fill in judge's C/O in the first place.
    and that extra he added on with the guardianship.. that made me start bawling right there. I truly can't get over it. I don't always agree with his decisions but have always felt he was a good and fair judge. I guess sometimes he sees things clearly faster than others.

    BabyFruit Ticker

                                                       

       Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers                            

     

    My Loves= SD 18 SS 16 SS13 DD13 DS10 SD6 SD5 

  • I am glad the judge went ahead and things went so well!
    DS1 - 6/07
    DS2 - 8/08
    DS3- 9/09
    DD1 - 11/11
    DD2 - 10/13
    DD3 - Csection Scheduled November 29th
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  • I'm so glad to hear things went so well. The guardianship in the case of an accident is spectacular. I didn't even know they could do that. Congrats and I hope things calm down for you and your family. 
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