Starting to freak out...

jessalynn521 · July 2013

This ish is getting real, and I need somewhere to let out my concerns without harsh judgement, and I don't feel like I can do that to the people IRL.

Last night I was having pretty crappy contractions. I started thinking about how we don't have anything really ready and had a panic attack which made the contractions seem worse. They finally stopped by this morning, but I am still sort of in panic mode. I don't really know how in the world having 2 ~12 mos. apart is going to work. I realize I have had since December to think about it, but raising a baby has been pretty good at keeping my mind distracted from it. I started to make a list for the hospital and I feel stupid at it. Like, I can't remember what was good to have. I can barely breathe all day because I am panicking as though it has been an eternity since having a newborn. Plus the idea of not making it to my due date with this baby makes me want to cry a little bit (read: A LOT.) I genuinely have felt like a wreck all day.

I am sure one day I will look back on this meltdown as silly, but I can't help how I am feeling right now. So much panic. Ugh.

If you read all of that here is my baby sitting on our vent, happy as could be

SJandVA · July 2013

Sorry you feel so anxious. Its normal to feel a little anxious, there is a baby on the way. Take a deep breath and try to relax. I don't really have any advice. But I bet things will work out great. It might be hard but you'll do wonderful and things will just fall into place when the new baby comes.
I think it's pretty normal to not have everything ready for the second like with the first.
I'm sure some of the other moms that have 2 kids close in age have some better advice.

Jnmac83 · July 2013

I'm sorry you're stressed.

I don't have any real advice, but one of my best friends as babies that are 1 year and 13 days apart (they'll be one and two in Nov). It is HARD some days are harder than others BUT it works. You will pick right back up on the NB phase and you'll be fine. I promise. It seems scary, but you will so awesome!!

Hang in there!

melmarie26 · July 2013

Everything Jenn just said. you will do great! everything will fall into place! take it from the girl who had 2 newborns with no cribs, no baby furniture and had went over a decade between having the last baby. it all fell into place! Sending hugs!

latnprincess · July 2013

I felt that way and I had 6 years to prepare! Its totally normal. All you can do is just take it one day at a time and take ANY AND ALL HELP! And please don't feel bad asking for help if you need it. 2 kids are no joke. But please be vocal when you're feeling overwhelmed. You are are not super woman and/or invincible. But I know you will be fine. Any questions, feel free to come on and post/ask away!!!

rp-chicago-mom · July 2013

Dude, I would be flipping too. But, it will work. The new one will be easier since you've been there done that and he will have no choice but to wait for his brother. That's why second children are less intense as a general rule. I know I am way less intense than my sister. And it will be harder because you will constantly feel like you're giving someone the short end of the stick.

Here's the lovely part about it though as you worry that everyone will be attention starved. I learned this from my friend who studied Montessori. A first child is born into an adult's world. He gets all his attention from the adults. A second (and subsequent) child is born into a child's world and any slack you may think he has will be made up for in droves by the older child. And one day, you will hear them playing together so well since they are so close in age that you will be so grateful you had them so close together. They will be there for each other...in between any adjustment it may take.

rainedrops117 · July 2013

latnprincess said:

I felt that way and I had 6 years to prepare! Its totally normal. All you can do is just take it one day at a time and take ANY AND ALL HELP! And please don't feel bad asking for help if you need it. 2 kids are no joke. But please be vocal when you're feeling overwhelmed. You are are not super woman and/or invincible. But I know you will be fine. Any questions, feel free to come on and post/ask away!!!

This exactly ^^^ I had my first three back to back (12 mos and 15 mos apart). I remember the panic that would overwhelm me once my water broke, and I acted as if it was my first time. lol... Once it's all said and done and baby is here you'll pat yourself on the back, "Job well done". Don't be afraid to ask for help or accept help. You'll love the closeness they'll develop and won't regret a thing... I sure don't.

bigbootyjudi · July 2013

Remember when you felt this way when A was born? "OMG, how am I going to handle a kid?!" Well, you figured it out, didn't you? and he's a happy, healthy, striving little boy, isn't he?

You'll be fine.
:-bd

megmb24 · July 2013

Just breathe! It's going to be ok. Right now it seems scary and overwhelming, but once you get in your groove you will be fine. You can do it!

katiejo1216 · July 2013

It would be strange if you didn't have a meltdown before baby #2 arrived! As others have mentioned, things will be fine and will pull together exactly as they need to. Life will be busy but your family will figure it out just like you did with Aiden's arrival.

And think about that sweet little babe you will get to hold so soon and to share with his big brother!

AutumnLeaves2 · July 2013

I'm sorry you feel so anxious!

You have every right to feel nervous...I know that I would! But think of how amazing it is going to be to watch your children grow up so close together! Hopefully they'll be the best of friends!

piphigirl · July 2013

Dude, I would be flipping too. But, it will work. The new one will be easier since you've been there done that and he will have no choice but to wait for his brother. That's why second children are less intense as a general rule. I know I am way less intense than my sister. And it will be harder because you will constantly feel like you're giving someone the short end of the stick.

Here's the lovely part about it though as you worry that everyone will be attention starved. I learned this from my friend who studied Montessori. A first child is born into an adult's world. He gets all his attention from the adults. A second (and subsequent) child is born into a child's world and any slack you may think he has will be made up for in droves by the older child. And one day, you will hear them playing together so well since they are so close in age that you will be so grateful you had them so close together. They will be there for each other...in between any adjustment it may take.

That almost made me want a second child, and nothing makes me want a second child! It was lovely.

smile50208 · July 2013

Sorry for the anxiety. Stay strong and it will all work out. You can handle it!

Jnmac83 · July 2013

Is TB broken?

Jnmac83 · July 2013

I can't start a new post or send a PM. Looks like I can reply to threads though? Anyone out there?

fastcarsandfreedom3319 · July 2013

You have every right to be nervous! I would be too! But you've done this before. You're good at being a mom--you will be an even better mom of two

jessalynn521 · July 2013

Thanks everyone. You all are awesome. I honestly am not sure what overcame me yesterday, but I feel much better today about this. You ladies really are awesome and I truly appreciate your support. ;;)

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