Community› The Bump Message Boards› Attachment Parenting
Attachment Parenting
New Discussion

Bedsharing advice please...

lgleyzelgleyze member
in Attachment Parenting

I started bedsharing with 6mo old DD about a month ago simply due to the fact that she would not sleep anywhere besides with me or her RnP, which she outgrew. She was doing well in the RnP, waking once or twice a night, or sometimes not at all, but it took me a long time to get her down. I tried to transition to the crib, but she would wake every time I laid her down. Since beginning bedsharing, she goes down so easily and so much earlier. The rest of the night was great at first. She would only wake a couple times to actually eat. Now, she still goes down great, but she's a big comfort sucker, and she knows she can have it whenever she wants it, so she's been waking many times per night to comfort suck. I've been trying the pantley pull off method during the day and she does great- doesn't need the boob to fall asleep most of the time and actually pulls away before falling asleep, but at night I usually fall back to sleep before she does so I don't get the chance to pull my breast out of her mouth. Anyway, long story short, I'd like to hear from parents who have bedshared and successfully transitioned their LO out of their bed. What age the transition take place, and if your LO waking multiple times to comfort suck, when did this decrease or stop? I love the closeness of sleeping with her and this is our best option for now, but I think I'd sleep better if she were in her own bed.

Also, a big reason why I don't sleep well is because I'm super conscious of her and I'm paranoid that she will get smothered. I KNOW I won't roll onto her, but is it legitimate to worry about her rolling into my breast and smothering at her age? She also likes to roll onto her side and sometimes her stomach. I'd like to think that she would wake herself and push away from me if she could breathe.

Sorry so long, thanks for taking the time to read and TIA for any advice!

Report Reply to Post

Re: Bedsharing advice please...

  • st.augbridest.augbride member
    Just wanted to say that I'm in the same exact boat. Started bedsharing the same way (trying to get out of RNP into crib, but wouldn't sleep in crib and outgrew RNP). In the RNP, dd would sleep all night or wake maybe 1-2 times to eat, but now she comfort sucks all night and wakes every hour until I join her in bed. I too feel less comfortable with her in bed since I know the crib is safer. We tried Ferber this weekend and it didn't go well at all. I hated it. Dh hated it. Dd really hated it. I felt so guilty, but I'm also desperate and don't know what to do. We need a non-CIO approach that will actually work.
    imageLilypie Premature Baby tickers imageLilypie Premature Baby tickers
    Report Reply
  • lgleyzelgleyze member
    Same here, I tried CIO too, and all it did was teach me that I NEVER want to try it again! I couldn't stick it out, it was painful. Good luck to you!
    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • mistd78mistd78 member
    I can relate, DD is 6 1/2 months old, and has bed shared since the beginning, for a couple of health reasons initially.  Now she is in there because she sleeps well, I sleep good, and I love having her there.  DH works out of town and is gone for 3 weeks at a time so it is just her and I, and I LOVE waking up to that smiling face.  As for the smothering concern, LO is old enough if she likes to roll over, or move around, she will be able to move away if the breast is smothering her, I can say this because my LO does it all the time, if she positions herself with too much of the breast in her face.  After she is done comfort sucking, she actually turns her head away from the breast at night now, and just lies her head on it.  I am working on some transitions as well, what I and my mother (who watches her during the day) have found is that her P n P has a vibrating comfort soother on it, LO goes down almost immediately, so I (trying to be creative) am going to try to get a chair massager that vibrates to put in her crib for some of that soothing movement.  It will go under the mattress just to provide some of that rocking that she loves in her swing, or the vibrations she loves in the car, etc.  As for being worried about LO moving around at night while bed sharing, my LO moves around and I wake to help get her comfortable, but then we both fall right back to sleep.  I hope this helps at least somewhat.  Good luck
    ~Misty
    Report Reply
  • mistd78mistd78 member
    Also we have some play time in the crib during the day so it isn't so scary.  We have a projector mobile which LO LOVES!  Plus a couple of toys, and do our story reading in there with lullaby going...
    ~Misty
    Report Reply
  • lgleyzelgleyze member
    Thanks for the advice, Misty! My DH works nights, so it's just her and I, and nothing beats waking up to that smiling face! Our own personal sunshines. :) Hopefully my LO will grow out of comfort sucking so much!
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"