FOMO = Fear of Missing Out
Has your FOMO gotten worse since being pregnant? "Is everyone hanging out without me?" "What are they gunna do if I don't go because I'm too tired, feel too gross, etc.?" "Are they talking behind my back like, 'oh, this is going to be how it is now since she's having a baby.'"?
I'm the first one of my best girl friends to not only get married but also get prego. I LOVE them and still want them to include me in as much as they can both now that I'm pregnant and once the baby is here I just feel like once the baby is born they're going to not want me around. Then I'm going to miss out on all the fun, "girl" time (which a mama still needs). Also...I feel like DH gets to do all this fun stuff with all our friends without a care in the world but I have to think about what I can and can't do/eat/drink/etc. or focus on how I feel.
Sure some of this sounds whiny...but does anyone else think about this lately or feel similarly?
Re: FOMO and pregnancy
Your life and priorities change when you have a child. If you are worried about missing out on things then honestly, you probably weren't ready to have a child. But life has given you this gift so you need to embrace it.
As for your friends, they will come and go during these big life changes. True ones will always prevail and be there for you.
I definitely don't think this means "I wasn't ready" to have a baby lol. As a FTM your life just goes through stages and changes and you don't realize it until you're in the thick, that's all. Most times you think about how your marriage or body and daily priorities will change...that's it. I'm lucky to say these 3 or 4 girls are the best around and have been so supportive of us during this time and through my whole life. I just hope it stays that way, that's all. I'll put in as much energy into maintaining these friendships as I can. While the baby will change things, I also won't use that as an excuse to not support and hang out with other people in my life that I love.
Thanks for all your input, ladies! Made me feel less FOMOish for sure. ::mobile smile::
#LOLFITMAMA
They don't talk behind my back. My quote in the OP was just an example of some angsty feelings others may have that come with the territory of parenting for the first time. I'm really not worried about losing my friends at all, really. I think the original intent of my post was missed. I'm actually not experiencing anything like this now or have this kinda drama...just hoping to start a convo about the changes of first time mommy hood. Some responders got it...you just feel like because you can't do what you used to 5+ months ago that you're missing out on something. That's all! It was nice to read some of the personal experiences and tips you all have given. Every mom/pregnancy/relationship/friendship is different, for sure!
#LOLFITMAMA
I completely understand what you mean...just this past weekend my husband went out drinking until 2 a.m while I stayed home and (attempted) to paint my toenails. I get resentful that he always says these are his last few months of freedom and he needs to get it out of his system when my freedom was gone the second I peed on the stick and it had two lines! Of course there were pictures all over Facebook the next day of our group of friends having a great time, minus me. It's especially hard being pregnant through the summer because that's when everyone has more time on their hands to hang out and do adventurous, non pregnant friendly things. We were trying to have a baby, so as ready as we are, it is still a huge adjustment. This was the first year I wasn't able to be with my two best friends on their birthday because they went to Busch Gardens, and I'm not going to be the pregnant lady that sits on the bench all day. It's just hard, and I'm sure your friends are like mine and have been there through the absolute worst and the absolute best so deep down you know they're not going anywhere, but you still can't help but wonder if they'll look at you differently or just assume you can't do anything because of the baby. Adjusting sucks!
Wyatt Born 09/05/08 MC Jan 2012 MC Feb 2012 MC Jan 2013
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On a positive, they have given my kids all their attention bc they've been the only ones! But yes, we've gone from bar hopping to backyard bbq's and passing out in guest rooms to setting up pack-n-plays! The joys of life...I wouldn't trade it for the world!!