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Babies: 9 - 12 Months
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I really do love my DH...really.

mrszimmmrszimm
in Babies: 9 - 12 Months

He just makes me so upset. I feel like I DO EVERYTHING for DD. Normally, I wouldn't mind this so much- if I didn't also work a 45-50 hour work week. I would really love to have a 2nd child one day, but I just don't think I can do it  if things don't change, b/c there is no way I'm working 45-50 hours/week AND caring for both a toddler and a baby w/ his little help.

 

He works nights, but when he's home he spends the majority of the time in the bonus den watching ESPN and smoking cigarettes (which is why DD and I will not go in there). He'll come out and play kissy face with DD- kiss on me for one minute before disapperaing again to the den. You would think it would make me feel better, but it doesn't. In fact, it just makes me more angry b/c it's like his way of trying to show he loves us and cares, but he won't actually spend a lot of time with us, or offer to help. If I want help- I always have to ask.

 

Ok, vent over. I really do love my DH. I just never knew how much of "Team Zimm" would really be all me.  

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Re: I really do love my DH...really.

  • mrszimmmrszimm
    Sidenote- This is really more of a "confession". I think this all the time, and just had to get it out. So, I don't really expect any advice. This post was more intended to make me feel better by getting it off my chest. Thanks, ladies!
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  • teach2183teach2183 member
    You need to tell your DH how you feel.  He can't read your mind.
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  • mrszimmmrszimm
    I know. I've said it before, but it was a while ago- back when Mollie was a few weeks old. I did get better, but then after a little while went back to being like this. I need to say it again b/c I really love him. And it has come to bother me so much that it is driving a wedge between us. Thanks.
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  • NYCredNYCred

    Maybe he needs a gentle reminder?  If talking doesn't work, what would happen if you went on strike? For a few days (if you can last that long) don't clean up after him, don't do the dishes, don't cook meals, hand him DD the minute he comes out of the den and tell him she needs a diaper change...basically make him realize just how much you're doing.

    good luck :)

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