August 2013 Moms

NBR: My sister

keeps getting really ugly tattoos and it is very frustrating to me for some reason. I feel like a snob. I'm not at all opposed to tattoos, but these are just really, really ugly. I feel like it's a symbol for "I've given up on myself completely." I am also very concerned for her safety because she is having them done out of a home. 

She promised she would not get anymore visible tattoos until after my wedding and BAM! this beaut shows up. 

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I don't know if it's my newfound parental emotions or what, but something that ordinarily would not upset me is really grinding my gears. 

NO FLAME PLZ!! ;)
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Re: NBR: My sister

  • imagemsspeedymarie:

    Yeah, it's unfortunate, but if she's an adult, there's not much you can do. Telling her what you think she should do is just gonna piss her off, most likely.

    I agree, I don't like her choice either. I guess pick her out a high-necked bridesmaid dress!


    Nah, the rules were if I can see it, you're out. I'm not spending thousands of dollars on a beautiful wedding and a photographer for it to be a sideshow. I don't think I'm doing bridesmaids now. I think it's more cost effective anyway - gonna be untraditional. 
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  • OMG, I would take it upon myself to lock my sister up in a cave. That IS awful. I do not see those aging well nor being easy to cover up in the future.
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  • Cause high necklines really don't work - it's springtime in Florida.
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  • I feel like, with a few exceptions, no matter how nice the tattoo itself is, chest tattoos just don't look good on women. Personal opinion, but there it is (and coming from a lady who has four tattoos of her own!)
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  • imageAprilRaine:
    OMG, I would take it upon myself to lock my sister up in a cave. That IS awful. I do not see those aging well nor being easy to cover up in the future.

    I mean, all of her tattoos look like prison tattoos. I actually enjoy tattoos for the most part, but she just looks like a convict. I feel so bad being so judgmentaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal. I just love her and she's so pretty. I don't understand. 
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  • imagecarlieanddanwedding:
    I feel like, with a few exceptions, no matter how nice the tattoo itself is, chest tattoos just don't look good on women. Personal opinion, but there it is (and coming from a lady who has four tattoos of her own!)

    I can't help but to agree. 
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  • I, of course, do not intend to say anything to her because what is done is done. No going back so no need to upset her. I just love her and wish she had more self-respect. 
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  • I have tons of tattoos and will forever semi regret the ones that can be seen in a dress. They're great work but I just don't like the way they look sometimes. I thank the lord that mom talked me out of a chest piece.
  • imageChelseamolee:
    I have tons of tattoos and will forever semi regret the ones that can be seen in a dress. They're great work but I just don't like the way they look sometimes. I thank the lord that mom talked me out of a chest piece.

    Yes, a chest piece is a pretty serious commitment. I just wish she would go to a better artist. That's all. I'm sure you know how important that is! This guy is just practicing on her... and it's permanent. 
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  • black is the easiest to remove, and the closer to the heart the better. meh, to each their own. I'm really covered, all the way up to my jaw. I don't expect everyone to approve. I also don't care if they don't either.

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  • No. No. No. When I was first reading I thought to myself that she could just use the tattoo cover up. Then I scrolled down no way! If that were my sister, I would honestly be the same way you are. Not only is it unsanitary, she is running a risk of not being able to look professional. I would feel like my sister wouldn't be taken seriously. Goodness. Also, I'm in process of planning my wedding, and will admit it'd be a lot more affordable and the planning would be a lot less stressful if I hadn't picked bridesmaids!
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  • imagemochalattemama:
    imageChelseamolee:
    I have tons of tattoos and will forever semi regret the ones that can be seen in a dress. They're great work but I just don't like the way they look sometimes. I thank the lord that mom talked me out of a chest piece.

    Yes, a chest piece is a pretty serious commitment. I just wish she would go to a better artist. That's all. I'm sure you know how important that is! This guy is just practicing on her... and it's permanent. 


    Hahahaha I have two of those "hey let me try out something on you" and we always make jokes and call them my prison tattoos. They never bothered me before but now as a mom I feel very insecure about them. Luckily after those two i learned and the rest of my work is from a very good shop. It sucks she has to learn the hard way like I did! Hopefully she can afford a good cover up in the future.
  • imageRooster&Memphis:
    black is the easiest to remove, and the closer to the heart the better. meh, to each their own. I'm really covered, all the way up to my jaw. I don't expect everyone to approve. I also don't care if they don't either.

    And I promise you, I really don't pass judgment on other people. I am just annoyed because it's a symbol of her current downward spiral. She has gotten 10 gigantic tattoos in 4 months and she is in a very vulnerable place in her life, but nobody can approach her about it. 


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  • imagemochalattemama:
    imageRooster&Memphis:
    black is the easiest to remove, and the closer to the heart the better. meh, to each their own. I'm really covered, all the way up to my jaw. I don't expect everyone to approve. I also don't care if they don't either.

    And I promise you, I really don't pass judgment on other people. I am just annoyed because it's a symbol of her current downward spiral. She has gotten 10 gigantic tattoos in 4 months and she is in a very vulnerable place in her life, but nobody can approach her about it. 



    I hear you. it's hard to watch people you care about make ridiculous decisions. she's gunna have to learn on her own.

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  • imageBlondieBia21:
    No. No. No. When I was first reading I thought to myself that she could just use the tattoo cover up. Then I scrolled down no way! If that were my sister, I would honestly be the same way you are. Not only is it unsanitary, she is running a risk of not being able to look professional. I would feel like my sister wouldn't be taken seriously. Goodness. Also, I'm in process of planning my wedding, and will admit it'd be a lot more affordable and the planning would be a lot less stressful if I hadn't picked bridesmaids!

    Yeah, but I don't want to ask her to cover it up. I asked her to wait until after the wedding in hopes she would reconsider some of these tattoos she decides to get the night of. 

    Bleh, maybe I'm a terrible beotch, but I love her and am sad for her. 

    I could never specifically exclude her from my wedding, so I think the best thing to do is to avoid a bridal party completely. How many people do you have in yours?
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  • imageChelseamolee:
    imagemochalattemama:
    imageChelseamolee:
    I have tons of tattoos and will forever semi regret the ones that can be seen in a dress. They're great work but I just don't like the way they look sometimes. I thank the lord that mom talked me out of a chest piece.

    Yes, a chest piece is a pretty serious commitment. I just wish she would go to a better artist. That's all. I'm sure you know how important that is! This guy is just practicing on her... and it's permanent. 
    Hahahaha I have two of those "hey let me try out something on you" and we always make jokes and call them my prison tattoos. They never bothered me before but now as a mom I feel very insecure about them. Luckily after those two i learned and the rest of my work is from a very good shop. It sucks she has to learn the hard way like I did! Hopefully she can afford a good cover up in the future.

    Aw, yeah. I have a bad one on my ankle, but it's really small thank goodness. I know, as mommies it adds a totally new element. But we'll be fine! Don't be insecure! 
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  •  Ugh, "prison" tats are so foolish. I'm sure she'll regret it someday but for now it's probalby best not to make a huge mess out of it. I really wouldn't write her off as a bridesmaid. Yes, she went against what you said but it's her body. That, and there are plenty of options to hide them and stay cool. 

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  • imagemochalattemama:
    imagemsspeedymarie:

    Yeah, it's unfortunate, but if she's an adult, there's not much you can do. Telling her what you think she should do is just gonna piss her off, most likely.

    I agree, I don't like her choice either. I guess pick her out a high-necked bridesmaid dress!


    Nah, the rules were if I can see it, you're out. I'm not spending thousands of dollars on a beautiful wedding and a photographer for it to be a sideshow. I don't think I'm doing bridesmaids now. I think it's more cost effective anyway - gonna be untraditional. 

     

    I got married last year and had 2 bridesmaids. One was amazing but my "MOH" and I don't even talk anymore. Honestly It would have been 100x less stressful without a bridal party and I wish I hadn't had one!  And those tattoos just make me want to cry... I totally understand where you are coming from! I have an 18 year old brother who has a million tattoos planned and am in the process of trying to talk him out of half of them that would keep him from ever looking professional.

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  • That is a very very ugly tattoo. I'd recommend a trial rum with some Kat Von D tattoo cover up, and I'm sure your photog could airbrush the rest if its still showing through.
     

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  • imageclarissamaealison:
    imagemochalattemama:
    imagemsspeedymarie:

    Yeah, it's unfortunate, but if she's an adult, there's not much you can do. Telling her what you think she should do is just gonna piss her off, most likely.

    I agree, I don't like her choice either. I guess pick her out a high-necked bridesmaid dress!


    Nah, the rules were if I can see it, you're out. I'm not spending thousands of dollars on a beautiful wedding and a photographer for it to be a sideshow. I don't think I'm doing bridesmaids now. I think it's more cost effective anyway - gonna be untraditional. 

     

    I got married last year and had 2 bridesmaids. One was amazing but my "MOH" and I don't even talk anymore. Honestly It would have been 100x less stressful without a bridal party and I wish I hadn't had one!  And those tattoos just make me want to cry... I totally understand where you are coming from! I have an 18 year old brother who has a million tattoos planned and am in the process of trying to talk him out of half of them that would keep him from ever looking professional.



    BTW I had no bridesmaids and it was the best choice I ever made. My pictures came out way better, I saved a ton of money and I had NO drama
     

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  • imageRoosterMemphis:
    black is the easiest to remove, and the closer to the heart the better. meh, to each their own. I'm really covered, all the way up to my jaw. I don't expect everyone to approve. I also don't care if they don't either.

    Yep this. I'm tatted and love mine! If I could get my full on sleeve I would.
    I can care less how anyhow feels about my tattoos and I'm sure your sister feels the same way. You can always find dresses that are higher up on the neckline though.

    I like the dresses that breezalina posted.
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  • Yikes, it may be the picture but that does not look like a stellar ink job.
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  • imagemochalattemama:
    imageBlondieBia21:
    No. No. No. When I was first reading I thought to myself that she could just use the tattoo cover up. Then I scrolled down no way! If that were my sister, I would honestly be the same way you are. Not only is it unsanitary, she is running a risk of not being able to look professional. I would feel like my sister wouldn't be taken seriously. Goodness. Also, I'm in process of planning my wedding, and will admit it'd be a lot more affordable and the planning would be a lot less stressful if I hadn't picked bridesmaids!

    Yeah, but I don't want to ask her to cover it up. I asked her to wait until after the wedding in hopes she would reconsider some of these tattoos she decides to get the night of. 

    Bleh, maybe I'm a terrible beotch, but I love her and am sad for her. 

    I could never specifically exclude her from my wedding, so I think the best thing to do is to avoid a bridal party completely. How many people do you have in yours?

    Oh I understand.. I was meaning I was thinking cover up thinking it was just something small, then bam I see that monster!! I do not think you are a B at all! We have 6 on each side, per my FI's decision haha.. I fought him on it but he has a big family so it was tough!
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  • Oh man! I'm not opposed to tattoos but I think that was inconsiderate of her to do right before your wedding. I wanted to get a small tattoo on my foot right before my SIL's wedding so I got her permission first. If she seemed like we wasn't happy with it I would have had no problem waiting until after the wedding. I think people look good with sleeves and people that are completely covered but just one big tattoo across your chest seems out of place or something.
  • imageCaliforniaDream87:
    imageRoosterMemphis:
    black is the easiest to remove, and the closer to the heart the better. meh, to each their own. I'm really covered, all the way up to my jaw. I don't expect everyone to approve. I also don't care if they don't either.
    Yep this. I'm tatted and love mine! If I could get my full on sleeve I would. I can care less how anyhow feels about my tattoos and I'm sure your sister feels the same way. You can always find dresses that are higher up on the neckline though. I like the dresses that breezalina posted.

    Yeah, I have a number as does my fiance, but they're thought out and performed by a professional artist. She literally says "hm, I feel like getting a tattoo right now" and does it with the same guy out of his house. I am concerned about her contracting an infection and I am concerned about how they are going to impact her life in the future. And again, not to sound like a brat, but I shouldn't have to alter my wedding plans for her spontaneous choices. If that is what she wants to do, great, but I can't change the dresses every time she makes that decision. She can sit with everyone else. 

    I don't want to exclude her or make her feel badly, so I think the best option is to just make the choice to not have a bridal party. It is something I've considered anyway just to save money and nothing has been purchased yet for prospect members. 
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  • Oh wow...

    I love tattoos and have 5 of them myself but I have to say that is a hideous chest piece...I would be less than thrilled about it being in my wedding pictures too.


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  • imageamandarins:
    imageclarissamaealison:
    imagemochalattemama:
    imagemsspeedymarie:

    Yeah, it's unfortunate, but if she's an adult, there's not much you can do. Telling her what you think she should do is just gonna piss her off, most likely.

    I agree, I don't like her choice either. I guess pick her out a high-necked bridesmaid dress!


    Nah, the rules were if I can see it, you're out. I'm not spending thousands of dollars on a beautiful wedding and a photographer for it to be a sideshow. I don't think I'm doing bridesmaids now. I think it's more cost effective anyway - gonna be untraditional. 

     

    I got married last year and had 2 bridesmaids. One was amazing but my "MOH" and I don't even talk anymore. Honestly It would have been 100x less stressful without a bridal party and I wish I hadn't had one!  And those tattoos just make me want to cry... I totally understand where you are coming from! I have an 18 year old brother who has a million tattoos planned and am in the process of trying to talk him out of half of them that would keep him from ever looking professional.

    BTW I had no bridesmaids and it was the best choice I ever made. My pictures came out way better, I saved a ton of money and I had NO drama

    Yeah, I have been considering it for that reason exactly. We are having a more intimate wedding anyway with our little surprise baby joining us and all. :)
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  • imageBlondieBia21:
    imagemochalattemama:
    imageBlondieBia21:
    No. No. No. When I was first reading I thought to myself that she could just use the tattoo cover up. Then I scrolled down no way! If that were my sister, I would honestly be the same way you are. Not only is it unsanitary, she is running a risk of not being able to look professional. I would feel like my sister wouldn't be taken seriously. Goodness. Also, I'm in process of planning my wedding, and will admit it'd be a lot more affordable and the planning would be a lot less stressful if I hadn't picked bridesmaids!

    Yeah, but I don't want to ask her to cover it up. I asked her to wait until after the wedding in hopes she would reconsider some of these tattoos she decides to get the night of. 

    Bleh, maybe I'm a terrible beotch, but I love her and am sad for her. 

    I could never specifically exclude her from my wedding, so I think the best thing to do is to avoid a bridal party completely. How many people do you have in yours?
    Oh I understand.. I was meaning I was thinking cover up thinking it was just something small, then bam I see that monster!! I do not think you are a B at all! We have 6 on each side, per my FI's decision haha.. I fought him on it but he has a big family so it was tough!

    Aw, yeah! I can see why he would want to include them but that is a lot! 
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  • This just adds to my reasons for wanting to slap your sister repeatedly.

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  • imagecarlieanddanwedding:
    I feel like, with a few exceptions, no matter how nice the tattoo itself is, chest tattoos just don't look good on women. Personal opinion, but there it is and coming from a lady who has four tattoos of her own!

    I feel that way about 99 percent of tattoos. They don't add anything.

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  • Whether the tat is ugly or not is a matter of opinion. As someone who has 8 and plans to get more I say eh...

    However just looking at the photo the quality of work is obviously poor. The guy went way too deep and she is going to scar. As she gets older she will probably get some bleeding together  too. Sucks for her.


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  • imagecrogers19:

    Whether the tat is ugly or not is a matter of opinion. As someone who has 8 and plans to get more I say eh...

    However just looking at the photo the quality of work is obviously poor. The guy went way too deep and she is going to scar. As she gets older she will probably get some bleeding together  too. Sucks for her.

    absolutely.

    Also- did you just find out?  Try to not make this about you and your feelings toward it.  It's her decision.  I would sit on it for a few days before making any changes to your bridal party. Her chest tattoos are not going to have any impact on how gorgeous your pictures are. 


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  • imagemochalattemama:
    imageCaliforniaDream87:
    imageRoosterMemphis:
    black is the easiest to remove, and the closer to the heart the better. meh, to each their own. I'm really covered, all the way up to my jaw. I don't expect everyone to approve. I also don't care if they don't either.

    Yep this. I'm tatted and love mine! If I could get my full on sleeve I would.
    I can care less how anyhow feels about my tattoos and I'm sure your sister feels the same way. You can always find dresses that are higher up on the neckline though.

    I like the dresses that breezalina posted.
    And again, not to sound like a brat, but I shouldn't have to alter my wedding plans for her spontaneous choices. If that is what she wants to do, great, but I can't change the dresses every time she makes that decision. ;

    Ok well then exclude her from your wedding.The same way you shouldn't have to "alter your dresses" she shouldn't have to alter her life for someones wedding day. I understand your concern but your sister is a big girl. So if she wants to get Tatted from her neck down to her feet it's her business, IMO.
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  • imageCaliforniaDream87:
    imagemochalattemama:
    imageCaliforniaDream87:
    imageRoosterMemphis:
    black is the easiest to remove, and the closer to the heart the better. meh, to each their own. I'm really covered, all the way up to my jaw. I don't expect everyone to approve. I also don't care if they don't either.
    Yep this. I'm tatted and love mine! If I could get my full on sleeve I would. I can care less how anyhow feels about my tattoos and I'm sure your sister feels the same way. You can always find dresses that are higher up on the neckline though. I like the dresses that breezalina posted.
    And again, not to sound like a brat, but I shouldn't have to alter my wedding plans for her spontaneous choices. If that is what she wants to do, great, but I can't change the dresses every time she makes that decision. ;
    Ok well then exclude her from your wedding.The same way you shouldn't have to "alter your dresses" she shouldn't have to alter her life for someones wedding day. I understand your concern but your sister is a big girl. So if she wants to get Tatted from her neck down to her feet it's her business, IMO.

    agreed. OP- I think there are more important things to worry about.  


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  • I like your idea of no bridesmaids. Brig bridal parties are over rated. As for your sister, I just hope she is being careful health wise when she chooses who and where they are done.
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