STM baby shower?

Lindsayloring1 · July 2013

What are your thoughts on baby showers for 2nd baby of the same gender? In your opinion, if the babies are being born in the same seasons just 2 years apart, is another big baby shower a no no, or do you think a small registry and a sip and see is better? I have a friend doing the big shower again, and I guess I'm not understanding why. I will gladly bring a gift, but it will most likely be essentials instead of toys and the like. What are your opinions?

cagoldi · July 2013

I have friends that have had them for the new baby of the same sex about 2 years apart. It doesn't bother me; I don't side eye it. I personally would not want a shower for my second baby, but if I'm invited to one I go and spend the same amount I did for their first LO.

fluttergirlmoonchild79 · July 2013

I'm an STM having opposite gender and I've had to stop several people from throwing me one. I personally think it's tacky and giftgrabby.

LoveOfMikesLife · July 2013

To me it all depends on your group of friends. In my group we celebrate each baby and have showers for each one.

My 2 boys will be 15 months apart. So DS1 is still using some things that DS2 will also need, crib changing table...... So where I don't expect any one to buy those things for me I probably will register so I can use the completion coupon to purchase them my self.

[Deleted User] · July 2013

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artistlife · July 2013

I don't agree with full on baby showers for 2CD time moms. I am ok with diaper showers. I am also ok with sprinkles in certain circumstances: the baby is a different sex, more than 4 year has elapsed and if it's multiples. Other than those reasons I feel like you just want presents. That's a general you, not directed at OP.

sands42 · July 2013

No, I won't be having a second shower and no I probably would not attend someone else's.

Lindsayloring1 · July 2013

LoveOfMikesLife:
To me it all depends on your group of friends. In my group we celebrate each baby and have showers for each one.nbsp;nbsp;My 2 boys will be 15 months apart. So DS1 is still using some things that DS2 will also need, crib changing table...... So where I don't expect any one to buy those things for me I probably will register so I can use the completion coupon to purchase them my self. nbsp;

See, this I totally understand! This is makes a lot of sense to me. As well as someone with a large age gap, I would definitely expect a big shower because of all of the baby items that expire after a few years, etc. thanks for all of your replies! Now I don't feel like such a meanie for not agreeing with the 2nd shower so soon thing!

rbtrumpet · July 2013

Another vote in the "no 2nd showers" camp.

I think it's fine to have a "meet the baby" party for family and very close friends, after the baby is born. These are generally not gift giving events, although some people may still bring something. No registry or anything would be provided.

oooCarrieB · July 2013

I would go w a meet the baby party instead of a shower for a STM.

I will be having a Meet the baby party in Jan w some of my relatives who live a couple hours away and wouldn't have a chance to see her regularly. I wouldn't expect gifts.

SweetLaura286 · July 2013

I like to celebrate each baby and have thrown second and third baby showers. Heck my SIL is having her 4th and I plan to get a few of her girlfriends together to take her out to lunch to celebrate!

Lindsayloring1 · July 2013

I think if someone else is throwing the shower, then that's another story. However, in this particular case, if you're sending out your own invites and all that, then I think it's a bit tacky. As far as a celebration lunch goes, I think that's a great idea!! Celebration of the baby is definitely going to happen!!

ladybugpeaches · July 2013

I've read quite a few posts about this. I don't see the big deal of someone throwing you a shower for a second baby. I feel like there are so many "rules" and people pass judgement so easily. I think getting together to celebrate a new baby is perfectly fine and if people bring gifts, then they do! I feel like the focus shouldn't even be on the gifs even at a first child baby shower. I think the focus should always be on celebrating the new life, not expecting people to bring you gifts. I understand it's SUPER helpful, but in the end, it's about the new baby and being excited about being parents either for the first time, second time, third time, etc. A baby is worth celebrating! And I don't want to feel guilty for wanting to celebrate a precious gift! Also, as far as gifts, I always thought the purpose of the gifts is to help the new parents with the essentials, not necessarily getting toys or other "extras". I always think of clothes, diapers, and things like that for gifts. That's the kind of stuff we registered for mostly, and just a few books... We also registered for the "big stuff" so we can get whatever discount afterwards...

Anna.Marie · July 2013

Lindsayloring1:
LoveOfMikesLife:
To me it all depends on your group of friends. In my group we celebrate each baby and have showers for each one.nbsp;nbsp;My 2 boys will be 15 months apart. So DS1 is still using some things that DS2 will also need, crib changing table...... So where I don't expect any one to buy those things for me I probably will register so I can use the completion coupon to purchase them my self. nbsp;

See, this I totally understand! This is makes a lot of sense to me. As well as someone with a large age gap, I would definitely expect a big shower because of all of the baby items that expire after a few years, etc. thanks for all of your replies! Now I don't feel like such a meanie for not agreeing with the 2nd shower so soon thing!

I will likely have a shower. My daughter will be 20 months when 2 is born. We've discussed that we'd like it after the baby is born. My family also celebrates each baby and I would probably be told I was having one anyways if I was to say no.

lhammerle · July 2013

I'm not having a shower or registering or anything like that. But my sister is throwing me a "sprinkle" and just inviting over my best friends a couple women in my family that I'm really close with. Since I'm having a girl and my first was a boy, I could see some of them bringing a girl outfit or something along those lines.

Rharold · July 2013

I think having a shower (put on by someone else, and not requested by the mom) is totally fine. It's more like a party to celebrate a new life change, no different from holding a cook out or a birthday party. I wouldn't personally have a registry, unless the person hosted asked for definite items I absolutely needed, but I would not be over the top. I am pregnant with #6 and I had a baby shower with all but my second baby (we moved at 8 months pregnant, and didn't have a lot of friends in the previous location). My last baby was a huge surprise (like this one, obviously), and we had gotten rid of everything baby we owned, and my friend held 3 babyshowers for me (one with my family, one with my church family, and one with my community and mom friends). They were all smallish, but what a kind thing to do! This time I'm having a boy for the first time, and had again gotten rid of everything, and I'm most definitely not expecting any kind of shower, but knowing the friends I have, they will do something... I even think my oldest daughter's college age friends have something up their sleeves. I say go with the flow, if you don't feel like going, that's fine, too.

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