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looking for advice

hmw52hmw52
in Blended Families
Please stick with me I'm new at this. 3 months ago me and my boyfriend found out we were adding a new member to our family. We both have little girls already (mines 2 his is 7) my ex and I split mutually, we both do our best, get along pretty well, and love the crap out of our little monster. His ex-wife is another story, she keeps his daughter away for weeks (usually if she hears she saw my daughter and me, or he doesn't do what she wants) she texts ridiculous things about his family calling them rude names (including his 6 yr old brother) texts rude things about me and my daughter, and tells him his little girl pretends she doesn't have a dad says just all around horrible stuff, at least 5 times a week! She calls at odd hours (11 pm to 2am) just to talk to him, when he asks about his daughter she gets pissy says he's not a dad and hangs up, if we don't answer she leaves a message saying his daughter was calling. Its gotten completely out of hand and Im scared when we announce the pregnancy that it will just get worse. I'm pretty sure we have a legal leg to stand on, I'm just confused on how to handle it now, I feel so bad for her she tells me she likes me but her mom can't find out she doesn't want her hurting me. Im in now way scared of this crazy person, I'm just worried about how this is effecting his daughter she already has a weird understanding of what her mom acts like, how do I help
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Re: looking for advice

  • SimpleJaneSimpleJane member
    Does he have a CO? I'm going to guess he doesn't based on the 'keeps his daughter away for weeks' comment.

    Get a CO and it won't be an issue.

    If you have a CO, file contempt if she breaks it.

    Depending on how far along you are I would keep the pregnancy under wraps for a while.

    Edit to add.... Tell her point blank.if it is not an emergency late night calls will not be tolerated and will be considered harassment.

    Also, your BF is gonna have to be the one to tale action and want all these things, not you.
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  • Sunday924Sunday924 member
    imageSimpleJane:
    Does he have a CO? I'm going to guess he doesn't based on the 'keeps his daughter away for weeks' comment. Get a CO and it won't be an issue. If you have a CO, file contempt if she breaks it. Depending on how far along you are I would keep the pregnancy under wraps for a while.
    All of this and if she won't stop calling at odd hours and texting everyone and you have asked her to stop the next step would be to file harassment charges.
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  • hmw52hmw52
    He does have one, that's the most irritating thing to me about it, they've been divorced 5 years I assume she only got this bad when she realized how serious we were getting I stayed out of it until i noticed the first time that 2 weeks went by without her and he never really talked about 
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  • SimpleJaneSimpleJane member
    imagehmw52:
    He does have one, that's the most irritating thing to me about it, they've been divorced 5 years I assume she only got this bad when she realized how serious we were getting I stayed out of it until i noticed the first time that 2 weeks went by without her and he never really talked aboutnbsp;


    So is this a problem with BF not enforcing the CO? Or is she allowed to have the kid for two weeks?
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  • hmw52hmw52

    She doesn't follow it at all, claims she doesnt have to her "therapist" told her not to. Seems like we only get her when her mom wants a day off or her mom finds out that we haven't ( her mom owns her a business pays for the lawyer)

     

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