- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Working Moms
virginiagirl11
member
FT working moms w/ two young ones - how do you do it?
virginiagirl11
member
in Working Moms
I'm a little terrified to go back to work in two weeks after having DS2. I'll be part-time for a month, then full-time from there. DH is self-employed and always needing to fit work in so, between work, kids, and keeping the household running, we are basically always "on."
Also, we always fix dinner after DS1 goes to bed (we do feed him dinner, though) because we want to spend actual quality time with him instead of just keeping him busy while we prep food, cook food, clean up, etc.
Because of how our schedules are going to look when I go back, I might go to work earlier instead of doing my previous 9am-6pm, which means I'll get home earlier and might actually have a little bit of time to fix dinner before he goes to bed.
How do you all work a full day, make a healthy dinner (not casseroles w/ condensed soups or frozen meals or Hamburger Helper, etc.) in a short period of time, spend actual quality time with the kids where they have your full attention, have enough time to unwind after they go to bed, have enough time to prep for the next day (pack lunches, prep pump equipment, bags for daycare, any paperwork or "homework" for DC), and get enough sleep? Oh, and if you manage to work out, too, how does that work?
Thank you!
natural m/c 7.1.10 
: sticky baby 4.25.11 : #2 due 5.18.13
: sticky baby 4.25.11 : #2 due 5.18.13
This discussion has been closed.
Re: FT working moms w/ two young ones - how do you do it?
You go into survival mode for a few months, then it gets easier. You know that babies and schedules don't mix, so you make the best of it. Then it gets better.
My kids at 4 and 2 and we have a good routine now. I pick them up and we get home around 5. They watch a half hour of tv while I do lunch dishes, pack lunches and make their dinner. Then, they eat and I sit down and talk with them. We play. we get ready for bed. Then after they go to bed, I make dinner for me and DH.
I get a good 3 hours of good quality time with them every afternoon.
I only have one with one on the way but work fulltime, etc. I try to cook a healthy meal or two on the weekends and freeze it and only cook the veggies that day (I like fresh not canned) and keep it easy. I try to get things done at night after they sleep and before 9pm so then it is adult time for me and the hubby from 9-11pm. As for working out that has been sporadic because my husbands schedule is nuts during the summer. I think you will get into the groove of things but do not go crazy if it isn't smooth right off the bat. Try to plan ahead with meal planning, and I leave grocery shopping and errands for Saturday morning, then during nap time do some deep cleaning and laundry so I can hang with the kids.
Its ok to not get everything done and perfectly you do have two young kids, get what you can done and do not worry you will figure out what works for you and your family.
I only have one and work full time and just that is difficult. I eat more quick type of meals than I would like to, I enjoy cooking but don't always have the time.
If you can afford it maybe hire a home cleaning service, that will be one less thing to worry about. When I cook I often make enough to eat for dinner two nights in a row. I am currently using emeals, so that has a lot of quick dinner ideas. But still I don't cook every night. I don't manage to work out much, except walking around on my lunch break and on the weekend.
1. It's not all going to get done the way it used to and that's ok. As someone put it in a previous post, I do my best to focus on the task at hand and give it my energy and attention.
2. I work out three days a week before I get DD from daycare. I usually just do cardio so I'm not at the gym for long.
3. I make a batch of one type of entree for DH and I to take for lunch all week. I portion it out and leave some in the fridge and freeze the rest. We take fruits and veggies as sides and bag that the night before. I also bake a batch of muffins from skinnytaste.com once every two weeks. I wrap them individually and freeze them. When we bag the lunch sides we take a muffin out of the freezer for the next morning. I have that with coffee and a banana for breakfast.
4. We meal plan based on the ads. Sometimes DH preps it on the weekend during nap time. We take the meat out of the freezer to thaw in the fridge the night before. We do a lot of crockpot meals.
5. We divided the cleaning out and made a list. Now neither of us feels like we do it all and we have a loose plan for when it will get done.
These are great! Thank you. If you don't mind my asking, what are your work hours re: #2 and when do you work out? And in #3, what types of meals do you make?
I am a teacher. Class starts at 720. I get there around 630. Class ends at 230. Mwf I leave at 3 to go to the gym and t th I stay later to tutor kids. I go straight to the gym.
Are you on pinterest? I have a board of our favorites. Most are from skinnytaste. I like her turkey taco chili, chicken enchilda soup and eggplant paninis best.
-Prep food on weekends. Or make healthy, quick meals. (i.e. Grilled chicken, salad and whole grain rice takes 20 mins max).
-Cleaning service.
-I own a treadmill that I use either after bedtime, early morning, during naps or I go to the gym at work during lunch. I also have weights at home and will lift 3-4 times a week after bedtime.
I don't have two yet, but I think I would be in survival mode for a while and maybe hire a mother's helper for several evenings a week until I got better at dealing. DH is a great help, but sometimes doesn't get home until 6:30-7.
I work full time and have two little ones at home. DH doesn't get home until after 7pm on a early night, so I know how it is to fly solo since I do it often.
I do the BARE MINIMUM to get by. I have a house cleaner come once a month to do all the deep cleaning so I only surface clean during the week as I go. Wipe down the bathrooms quickly in the morning, sweep and vacuum during naptime on the weekends, etc. Laundry is the biggest chore in my house, so I HAVE to keep up on it. I NEVER let it pile up bc I will get overwhelmed and shut down if I do, LOL. I have at least three days worth of bottles and pump parts and run both through the dishwasher every other day.
As for food- I mean plan and I aim to cook Sat and Sun's and then twice during the week- grilled meats and veggies, or I'll put a couple of chicken breasts in the crockpot with water or broth on Monday and shred them and use for various things during the week (salads, tacos, etc). Google skinnytaste crockpot buffalo chicken wraps- it's whats for dinner tonight! The other couple of nights are things like eggs and toast, garden burgers on an english muffin with steamed veggies on the side, or sandwiches (or wraps). No ones childhood was ruined bc they ate too many sandwiches!
I also run three times a week. On Sat mornings and then twice during the week. The baby goes down at 7:30pm, I nurse him and put him down, and I leave shortly after while DH puts DS1 to bed. I put my workout clothes on as soon as I get home to keep me motivated.
You can do it. You really need to figure out what's a priority and go from there. Do what you can and leave the rest for tomorrow. ::whispers:: sometimes my bathrooms don't get wiped down everyweek
GL!!
I changed my schedule at work once I returned after DS#2 was born- that gets me to day care for pick up at 4:30pm, we are home by 5pm- which is great!
Meals: I meal plan and do all the shopping on the weekends. I also try to cook things that don't take very long (salmon, shrimp, pasta, etc.) to cut down in timing.
Quality Time: DH usually gets home around 6:30-7pm, so we don't eat until then anyway. I spend quality time with both kiddos (mainly DS #1 since he goes to bed earlier) by playing and engaging in an activity while going back and forth between that and dinner. Once DS #1 goes to bed (8:30pm) I spend my special time with DS #2, bathing him and snuggling/nursing him to sleep.
Packing/Cleaning: I leave all the packing/cleaning/preping for the next day until after DH is home. After dinner he takes over the kids, I clean up from dinner, pack lunches, bottles, clean pump parts, etc- I have learned to get this all done in about 30 minutes. One tip that has helped is to get 2 sets of pump parts & bottles- so I don't have to wait for them to dry to pack up. I have another set I can pack while the set I used that day is cleaning/drying.
Gym/Workout: I try to go to zumba classes 2x/week, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. I also try to go for walks/runs with DS#2 while DH is bathing DS#1. I could improve in this area, but I already feel spread so thin I don't know how I can fix this.
Another tip is I do all the laundry/cleaning on the weekends. That way there is very minimal housework to be done during the week. It's crazy with two kids and working full time- but you'll find your routine and get into the swing of thing with no time. Good luck- you'll do great
My wind down time and my prep time overlaps. I prepare lunches, pack bags, wash dishes with the tv on and often while having a beer. I then usually get a few minutes to relax in bed before falling asleep.
I don't formally work out but I try to do a lot of walking on the weekends when the temperature is not oppressive.
I keep up with work by fitting in a bit extra during naps on the weekend and after bedtime.
I have four children and my husband and I both work full-time. How do we do it? I started by cutting myself a little slack and lowered my expectations. I'm not going to cook dinner every night, my house isn't going to be immaculate, etc.
You need to give yourself a little time to find your own routine and rhythm. I try and make my work week as simple as possible - I only do what really needs to get done those days. So, things like laundry waits for the weekend.
We have someone come and clean our house every other week which is super helpful.
During the week, you can make quick healthy meals (how long does it take to make salmon and some wilted spinach?) and you can also make healthy frozen meals. My husband and I sort of switch off on the dinner thing. One of us is cooking and one is with the kids. That is the time I'm asking them about their days, getting things ready for school the next day, signing their papers etc. (I realize yours are a bit younger than my oldest but my two youngest are playing while I do this) and then I have a little time with all of them before dinner. We also have a bedtime routine which gives each one a little individual time which isn't easy when you have four but we've found a way to make it work even if sometimes it means one night I have time with two of them and the next night I have time with the other two.
Oh, and I also try and give myself at least 10 extra minutes in the mornings to so quick backpack and diaper bag checks to make sure everything is set for the day.
It's hectic, some days more than others, but you just find a way to make it work, you really do.
Kelly, Mom to Christopher Shannon 9.27.06, Catherine Quinn 2.24.09, Trey Barton lost on 12.28.09, Therese Barton lost on 6.10.10, Joseph Sullivan 7.23.11, and our latest, Victoria Maren 11.15.12
Secondary infertility success with IVF, then two losses, one at 14 weeks and one at 10 weeks, then success with IUI and then just pure, crazy luck. Expecting our fifth in May as the result of a FET.
This Cluttered Life
I have about the same age gap between my kiddos as you do with yours. We are constantly go go go from sun up to sun down but I do the best to try to simplify things.
Meals--I only do real cooking on the weekends. Saturday and Sunday I double the meal to eat as leftovers on Tuesday and Thursday. Monday I do a crockpot meal. Plently of crockpot meals are healthy--chili, chicken noodle soup, pot roast, etc. We eat the leftover crockpot meal on Wednesday and eat out/order in on Friday. I keep sides simple. Frozen organic veggies that I can heat up quck in the microwave as always my go to. I love this set up because I waste no time cooking after work.
Laundry--I knock it all out on Friday and Saturday night. I feel like it's easier for me to focus on it over a couple days than to do a little each night.
By the time my oldest is in bed it's 930pm. I shower while DH cleans the kitchen. Then I prep DD2's food and DH makes the bottles. By this time it's typically 1030pm/11pm. We'll zone out to some TV or do a little bit around the house and are in bed by midnight. I only run on the weekends with the girls in the double BOB. It's hectic but it's all I know so we make it work.
I don't have two young ones, but I thought I'd chime in. I have a rising kindergartener (and SAH the first 3 years).
To answer your question about healthy meals, Pampered Chef has a great cookbook called "29 minutes to Dinner". I also get great healthy crockpot recipes from Weight Watchers and regular recipes from Better Homes & Gardens. I cook on the weekend for Sun, Mon, & T. DH cooks on Wed for Wed and Thurs. We have fun eating out or getting take-out on Friday and Saturday.
To answer your question about quality time, DS only watches 10 minutes of TV per day if I work the next day. This gives us more undivided quality time to do arts and crafts together, play in the backyard kid pool, read books, etc. I also use my leave and some leave without pay to be able to work part-time hours (32 hrs)every other week during the school year and PT (16-32 hrs) every week during the summer.
To answer your question about "me time" unwinding. DS goes to bed at 7:30 which gives me time to catch up with DH for a few minutes and allows me to talk on the phone to family/friends, or watch part of a DVRd program. DH & I also do two dates per month.
Also, if you practice a faith, I do my devotional time during my lunch hour (Bible Study).
I don't have to pack DS lunch since he eats a real lunch meal at school from the school cafeteria who has a cook who actually makes the food. They do not serve processed food. I do pack my lunch and shower before DS goes to bed. Homework gets done sometime between dinner and bedtime.
To answer your question about enough sleep. I do a hard stop at 8:30 pm and go to bed because I know I need at least 9 hours to function properly the next day.
To answer your question about working out. I do 100 crunches daily after DS goes to bed. Granted, it's not cardio, but it is something and it only takes 5-10 minutes to do. I also make sure I eat the right amount of vegetables & fruit.
As a fellow prior SAHM, be sure that your husband helps out more around the house or get a mother's helper. You cannot work FT and do everything inside the house on your own.
Congrats on your new job! :-)
My kids are 20 months and 4 months and I've been back at work FT 8:30-5:30 since April. We have a nanny which makes a big difference for us since we aren't packing food, etc but I think I can help with what we do after work. I get home at 5:40, greet the kids, chat with the nanny then my husband gets home. Most days he goes for a run and I take the kids out and power walk for about 30 minutes so there's my workout time. We get home around 6:30-6:45 and do dinner which these days is just easy stuff. We basically just choose a meat or fish and "cook" that which usually means throw some seasoning on it and put it in the oven or on the grill. We do a ton of 90 second Uncle Ben's rice and add a quick salad or maybe roast some broccoli or something. It's SO easy. If we grill, we will hang out outside with the kids. Dinner prep takes maybe 20 mins then we eat. Playtime is until 8:15-8:30 then we do bath and bed for DD. DS goes down between 9 and 9:30 and then we have adult alone time til we go to bed which is around 10-11.
I think keeping it simple when it comes to dinner is the biggest thing for us. We don't choose complicated recipes and we keep our fridge stocked so that on any given night, we have something we can put together. If we don't then we get Jimmy John's. I always keep a frozen pizza in the freezer too!
I taught part-time this past year, and was out of the house 11-5 M-F. We were really good about meal planning and prepping - one of us would cook at least two extra meals on the weekend for weeknight dinners. We'd also make sure to cook double of things you can freeze. And eating something like meat + veggies is fast and easy (grilling was my go-to meal once it got warm enough). We also would plan for on take out meal a week, which helped a lot.
As for having time for everything you listed, that's a lot of stuff. Does your DH pull his weight in terms of cooking and helping prep things for the next day? If not, I would ask him to help out and take on more responsibilities so it's not all on you.
I would end up going to bed pretty late when I was working - I craved having "me" time, and late at night was the only time I'd get it. Probably not the best plan, but I'm more of a night owl than an early bird.
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
The last year is kind of a blur.
I don't think I sit down to relax until about 9:30 or 10 each night.
I work out during lunch sometimes or H hangs with the kids while I go to a class on the weekend or we all go running as a family to the park.
We make dinner from scratch almost every night (DD was MSPI so my diet was severely limited, processed food and restaurants weren't even much of an option) A lot of times it was just me & the kids b/c of H's commute. I would bring toys into the kitchen and just work around them.
We don't clean up dinner until the kids are in bed - that way we can just play with them.
I agree with pp, the first year after having DD2 is a huge blur. You just kind of go, go, go and then the year is over.
I also agree with the cut yourself some slack advice. Meals with condensed soup or even ordering pizza once a week isn't a bad thing. We generally do a starch (pasta, rice or potato), a veggie (frozen in the winter, fresh in the summer) and a protein each night. The proteins are usually pan fried or grilled. It takes 30 minutes to get the meal on the table.
Quality time with the kids can come in many forms, you don't have to be focusing on them constantly to have quality time. We take them to the park and they play while DH and I talk about our day. Or we let them watch a show while we get things done around the house. Sometimes both girls need a little downtime when they get home too.
You will survive the year and it really got better for us once DD2 turned 1 and started sleeping more.
My kids are older now (7 and almost 6) and we have one on the way...
I've always worked FT and my husband is in LE with crazy hours. Somethings we do to "get things done" are:
1. Dinner: There is nothing wrong with grilled meat, some steamed veggies. When the kids were younger and needed more supervision we turned toward this quite often. Now that the kids are a little older, and one very picky, we tend to do a lot of the same dinners weekly - pasta, breakfast for dinner, Burgers, Chicken, Meatballs and rice, etc. You'll find what dinners work for you, your kids and your schedule.
2. Gym: I discovered Crossfit. Staying in shape is a big deal to both of us. Three to four days a week I will do (or did before I got pg) Crossfit. You can do these at your gym and just get the WOD (work out of the day) from a website. We also joined a gym with a daycare and one we felt comfortable taking our kids to. You can be done with a WOD in 20-25 minutes and have had a butt kicking work out.
3. Bedtime routines: We were/are a huge stickler for bedtime. This gives us a little grown up time and time to do stuff sans kids around the house.
4: Mornings: I get up two hours before my kids. I get my coffee and work for about an hour before I get in the shower. I get fully ready before I get my kids up.
5: Prepare the night before: If you pack lunches, get them packed at night. If you pack a diaper bag, do it the night before. If you need to set clothes out, do it the night before. Doing as much at night as you can, really helps to get the mornings off on the right foot.
6: Household chores: Both my husband and I are tidy by nature, so this comes fairly easy to us. Just stay on top of stuff - don't let the mail pile up (toss the junk mail when it comes, file the bills when they come, etc), don't go to bed unless the living area is picked up, run the dishwasher at night, etc. Doing a little bit every day helps ALOT. Same with laundry.
7: Homework: Ugh. This is currently our biggest issue. I provide as much guidance and space as they need, but ultimately homework is their responsibility. This is our nightly battle. I tell them school is their job and we don't play until our work is done. If this means they miss TKD one night because it's taken him two hours to do one math worksheet, the loss is his. Basically I know not to schedule much during the week nights because as a parent, I believe it's my job to make sure they're prepared for school and I know that some nights it takes my two all.freaking.night to prepare for the next day.
Most of all, just know that you life before isn't going to look the same. Figure out what is important to you (gym, healthy dinners, clean house, etc), and focus on those things. Then take care of the rest of it on the weekends. And know that as they grow up, it tends to get easier some ways and more challenging in others.