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A win for gentle parenting

KateLouiseKateLouise member
in Attachment Parenting

I just about always explain to DD1 what I'm doing or about to do, if I think that it might upset her or she might misinterpret my actions. 

eg If she's been fussing about DD2 touching one of her toys, and I've finally persuaded her to put it down so that she can eat. I might then move the toy up high away from DD2 but I'll say to DD1, "I'm just moving this so that...and I'll get it back down for you when you've finished eating."

This approach of communication and explanation eliminates a lot of fussing and whining before it begins.

So today we were in the car and DD1 kept snatching DD2s teddy off her, which was making DD2 shriek. I'd talked to DD1 about what she was doing, and was getting irritated with her, and she'd finally stopped doing it.

Then DD1 suddenly says, "I'm just going to pass teddy back to Jane, ok Mummy. So she doesn't get upset." I looked in the rear-view mirror and could see that DD2 had in fact dropped the bear where she couldn't reach it.

I thanked her, and I was driving along thinking that's pretty cool that DD1 thought to explain to me what was going on, and then I realised that she was mirroring what I do to her. 

So next time I feel like rushing through or not bothering to explain something, I'm going to remember this. 

 

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Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old
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Re: A win for gentle parenting

  • Emerald27Emerald27 member
    That is awesome! You rock, mama!

    ETA: And so does your DD! So perceptive.
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  • musicalmama5musicalmama5 member
    Absolutely beautiful!
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  • Mrs.AmyDylanMrs.AmyDylan member
    That is so wonderful!
    TTC Since 3/2010
    Me-36, Unexplained Infertility, DH-35, all clear
    Clomid 50mg 12/2011 = BFN
    Clomid 100mg 1/2012 = BFN, with Cyst
    IVF #1 Lupron/Menopur/Gonal-f/HCG Trigger
    ER 4/19/12 = 11 retrieved, 6 fertilized,
    ET 4/22/12 = 2 transfered (day 3), remaining 3 weren't good enough to freeze
    Beta 5/3 = BFP, 87 Beta #2 5/7 560.9 Beta #3 5/9 1376.5 First u/s One Baby, 125bpm!
    Second u/s, 176bmp! Kicked over to the OB by the RE at 8w. Team Green!! 
    Baby girl J arrived two weeks early! Born into water, med-free. Hooray for Team Pink!

    TTC #2 - back to the RE, treatment started 12/2014. 

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  • ObLaDiObLaDi member
    That is awesome!
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  • RioG1978RioG1978 member

    :)  This is great, what a sweet girl you have.

     I do the explaining thing too, and it helps in so many situations.  Like if I'm taking her upstairs and I know she'll get upset because she thinks I'm taking her for a nap when she doesn't want one (or something like that, she's only 13 months) I make a big point of explaining that we're going up there so I can get dressed, and then we'll come back downstairs to do xyz.  It really works and I can almost always ward off the tears of misunderstanding.

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  • boogerbearoriginalboogerbearoriginal member

    Kids really can understand a lot more than we give them credit for, and I think sometimes the explanations/etc make life feel harder while you're doing it but pay off in the long run.

     



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  • KateLouiseKateLouise member
    Yeah they really do
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    Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old
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  • URMySunshine77URMySunshine77 member
    I love this! Thank you for sharing.

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                 Visit The Nest!image Visit The Nest!

      "It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness." - Eleanor Roosevelt


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