Things don't quite turn out the way you want, PIP (long)

So I have waited a while in getting this down but all the conversations lately about "to epi" or "not to epi" got me thinking about my own road to delivery.

I think most every "mom to be" is not only excited to be pregnant but is scared sh!tless. There is so much to learn and so much to do, 9 months is no where near enough time to get prepared, and honestly?. you are never prepared. From running out and buying books about pregnancy to taking classes about the decisions you get to make when delivering, geesh and let?s not forget to mention all the toys/gear you need once baby is here. I was just like that, I read, I took classes and I listened to anyone who was willing to give me advice (and every mother wants to give you advice when you are pregnant). Being pregnant is stressful enough without the fear of others judging the decisions you have made. In the end the choices made should be those that you, your DH (or SI), and your doc (or mid-wife)  have discussed thoroughly and made together.
And I guess that is the moral of my post always keep an open mind and know now that more than likely not everything will go the way you plan. Here is my story?.

After getting through the 1st tri without one single side effect from pregnancy (except of course the positive stick) I thought I was set up for a pretty laid back, uneventful experience, it was anything but this. At 22 weeks my DH, I, and his family took a last minute trip to Hawaii. FIL had just passed away from cancer and the stress was unbearable for all, we needed to get away. While there I took a slip and fall (this is not what his Mother needed to see after just watching FIL go through what he did). I hit the ground pretty hard, hard enough to shove my tooth through my lip. Here's what I looked like that week:

Fortunately my "motherly instinct" must have kicked in and as I fell I twisted and landed on my right side. After trying to get in contact with my "on call" doc back home (6 hour time difference made it difficult) we went ahead and headed to a hospital, yes on the island of Kauai! Here DH wanted to document:

Well everything turned out fine and we even got to have another Ultrasound which was pretty cool.

Fast forward to Week 29:

I was awakened at 1:30am one morning with horrendous side pain. I couldn't sleep and tried to just get through it. I thought it was gas but my doc wouldn't allow me to take Gas X and asked me to come on in (this was at 10am that morning and I was still slouched over in pain). Well they felt it was just "round ligament pain" and told me to wait it out. After reconsideration my doc sent me to the hospital to have me monitored. Once there they "tried" to do an ultrasound but I couldn?t lay there sill enough to do anything in depth. They ruled out kidney stones and kept me there all day for monitoring. At 11pm that night the pain miraculously disappeared (and to today I have no idea what it was). Docs were happy but perplexed and wanted to keep me monitored. So I was to stay the night there and hopefully leave that next morning. Finally after nearly 40 hours of being awake I got to rest. Or so I thought....

2am, I had just fallen asleep for maybe 20 minutes, when I was awoken to a swarm of nurses screaming and shouting (I couldn't really tell what was going on as I was so out of it), finally one got down and told me, "your baby's heart-rate dropped, it was in the 40's". Okay I am thinking to myself what does that mean she should be at least 120 right? Trying to listen to what was being said in the background, I hear ?C-Section?, ?Surgery?, ?she's only 29 weeks?! At this point I am scared, I am crying, DH is crying, holding my hand, saying "It's going to be ok" while I kept thinking "how do you know?". So now a nurse walks in with her cell phone and says, "Lauren Dr. "Q" is on the phone and wants to talk to  you". Honestly I don't remember what she said, all I knew was I was now headed to the NICU at the hospital down the street... in an ambulance.

I have now arrived at the NICU and am encountered by a doc who rather rudely asks me why I m there. I explain to him the situation as I knew it, to which he rolled his eyes and says "that hospital always freaks out about the smallest things". Well that wasn't what I was expecting. So they hook me up and continue to monitor me. They give me a steroid shot ?Just in Case.?  Now her heart-rate is doing fine but I am having lots of contractions. For three days I was steady, heart-rate normal with lots of contractions. Docs there finally felt I was able to go ahead and head home.

Over the next few weeks I prayed and did limited activity. I felt if baby could hold on until 34 weeks at least I would be proud and happy. So at 32 week I had my baby shower & at 34 weeks I was the MOH in a wedding: (In pink dress)

The whole time my BFF joked that I could go into labor on her wedding day! Then she made me promise not to have her until she was back from Honeymoon! Thank fully I did but only by 5 days! And here comes my L&D story?

So on Thursday September 25^th I went into the doc?s office to have my 36 week checkup, normal process just to check my BP and to measure my belly. Well I get into the room, DH sits down in the chair and I of course prop up on the bed. In comes nurse tech. She Doppler?s me for a couple of minutes trying to find HB. Finally she looks at me and says ?I am new and I am having troubles, I think I keep getting yours, I am going to go and get some help.? Well next thing I know in runs my doc (kind of freaking out) she starts trying to find it, she does, and the low beat wasn?t mine, it was in fact my DD?s. She moves me around and gets it to come up. She says that even though she got it up, she was sending me to the hospital, it was in the 60?s this time. Out she runs and screams ?Call 9-1-1!? DH and I are kind of stunned, we had been through this whole hospital routine before so I don?t think I knew to be scared. Next couple minutes in come police officers, EMT, fire people, ummmm yes right into my GYNO?s office! How weird! They load me up on the gurney and off I go to the ambulance. I look up and all these construction workers are standing there (working on building next door), I hear the EMT?s tell DH they were running hot down to the hospital, yup hot = lights and sirens.

So we get downtown to the hospital and as they push me in, there stands a trauma team ready to perform a c-section. They talk and decide instead to go ahead and get me upstairs and monitor the situation. As I am in the triage room again, there are at least 5 nurses around, docs getting DH to sign paperwork for a c-section, both my doc and the anesthesiologist are both there ready to go. Eventually they decide her HB is back up and we now have time to run some tests and see what the issue is. I have 2 ultrasounds (one internal and one external) nothing. They wheel me back to a waiting room and a doctor comes in and tells what his plan of action is now. An amniocentesis will be able to tell just exactly how developed her lungs are, we need a 30 to pass. She scores a 74, thank goodness for that steroid shot at 29 weeks! I never even asked what we were going to do if it was too low, I honestly didn?t want to know. Things are set we will start an induction that evening.  

10 pm they come in and insert ?cervidil?, it?s this stringy thing that goes up in you that is supposed to ripen your cervix. I was not even a fingertip dilated and 0%effaced so this was supposed to help in getting my ?real? contractions started. With this you have to lie down & still for the first 2 hours. I did this and drifted off to sleep. Well Friday September 26^th at 2.30am I was awakened by the pain, the nurse suggested ?Tylenol? to which I responded, ?B!tch I am way passed Tylenol?. She finally went and got permission to get me Nubaine. This knocked me out until 5am. Again I woke up from the pain and was told at this point I had to deal with it. And I did, for 4 more hours I laid there and dealt with it. Finally 10am, the docs took it out, yeah. Not for long though as they now were hooking me up with some pitocin. This wasn?t that bad actually, I was able to walk around and also do the birthing ball. One nurse said ?wow you look so much better? really do you think I was lying about the pain I was in? A couple of laps around the hospital floor and back to my ?Fung Shui? decored room but only after DH runs into a buddy from his high school. They chat while I am half naked in my hospital gown, nice first impression! Anyway all afternoon it was like this. I found it soothing in the shower, naked and letting that warm water hit my back. Oh! What?s that in the drain? Just my Mucous Plug! The nurse seems so ecstatic, I am progressing. An hour later I use the potty and ?goosh? my water breaks. This wasn?t anything I was expecting, it kept gushing hours later. Having to keep changing that pad was so gross. Ok it?s now 8pm. Doc comes and wants to go back to the cervidil, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I begged for anything else but she says she needs me to have the contractions that I was having earlier in order to get things moving. I was now only a fingertip dilated, geeez! So 10pm they come in to give me another dose of the cervidil, they also check, I am now 1cm dialated. After 10 minutes with the cervidil in me I am climbing the walls, crying, begging for them to take it out. Nurse argues with me that it?s a $500 dose of medicine, to which my DH replies ?I don?t care take it out!? An hour later they finally relent, they check me and I am now 3+cm dilated. They are going to give me the epi. My worry at this point was that it was too early but I had now officially been in labor for over 26+ hours and I was ready for some rest. Now it?s September 27^th and by the time the anesthesiologist gets there, I am convulsing from the pain. It takes 2 nurses to hold me down so he can get the needle in. (I later learn the anesthesiologist was a hot young guy! Great, at least I don?t remember him). I ask how long it will take to take affect, he says no longer than 30 seconds. 10 seconds later I whack my leg and say ?look I can?t feel thing? proceeded with my head leaning back and snoring!  It was 3am when I officially got some rest. 2 hours later I was awakened to a familiar feeling. I wake up and there is a nurse there. I say ?ummm, I think I have to poo?. She looked at me strange and said let?s check you out. Nope no poo, DD head was right there and ready to go. They hurry up, get my doc in the room and within the next 15 minutes DD was born:

5lbs 5ounces, 18.25? long, at 5:12am

She is happy and healthy and absolutely perfect. Did it go the way I thought or wanted, no. But I think we made the best decision with the information we had. We were flustered, we were scared, we had her best intentions and did what we thought was best. I don?t think I know how you may react to this but it is just one of billions and billions of birth stories that don?t go the way you think it would.

Thanks you for reading! Sorry it was so long!

Lauren