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the IF emotional roller coaster...

JalepenoPepperJalepenoPepper member
in Secondary IF

...completely SUCKS.

You try not to get your hopes up because you don't want to be disappointed, yet a small part of you holds onto hope that maybe this cycle...maybe this is it after x months/years of trying! And then, just like that, spotting or Day 1 or whatever hint that tells you nope, not again. 

 

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Re: the IF emotional roller coaster...

  • Sharon216Sharon216

    I'm sorry.  IF does completely suck.  There's really no other way to say it.  I am constantly pissed off that so many idiots can get pregnant at the drop of a hat but so many of us that truly want a child cannot.  

    DD conceived naturally in 2009.  TTC #2 since August 2010.  Praying for guidance as we decide what's next.

    When the world says, "Give up,"

    Hope whispers, "Try it one more time."

     ~Author Unknown

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  • Momarazzi007Momarazzi007 member
    Agreed!!!
    January 2007- Stop BCP! Let's DO this!
    June 2010- MFI. BS. IVF! Ectopic. BS. image

    November 2010- FAILED FET! BS!
    January 2011- BFP FET! TWINS!     February 2011- lost twin. BS. image

    SEPTEMBER 2011- DD Born! Most awesome girl in the world!
    November 2013- FAILED FET! BS! (screw you November FETs)
    April Fresh Cycle, FAILED. Frozen embryos frozen for future FETs.
    FROZEN CYCLE JUNE! BFP
    BABY BOY VINCENT!
    image

    We can't wait to meet you!
    Conception:image    imageimage Potato Love!

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  • MJC1116MJC1116 member
    imageSharon216:

    I'm sorry.  IF does completely suck.  There's really no other way to say it.  I am constantly pissed off that so many idiots can get pregnant at the drop of a hat but so many of us that truly want a child cannot.  

    This. Or that so many people who don't have to worry about their fertility constantly complain about it. And that they seem to have control over their fertility and I have none over mine. It makes it that much harder to deal with.

    For me it's also coming to grips with the fact that I have a problem. I never thought we'd be dealing with this, and the shock hasn't worn off. Not to mention, I feel like I'm letting my husband down. He's an incredible father and I fear I won't be able to give him more children. He's been great about it and tells me he loves me no matter what, but it's still a big downer. 

    I'm so sorry that you are feeling so down, but I completely understand how you feel. 

    DH & I: 29
    TTC #1 4/2009 -  DD 2/5/10
    TTC #2 since October 2011
    2IF issues
    7/2013 - IUI #1: 50 units Follistim +  Ovidrel  = BFN
    8/2013 - IUI #2: 50 units Follistim +  Ovidrel  = BFP! Beta #1 (12 dpiui) 8/21: 45  Beta #2 (16 dpiui) 8/26: 301 Beta #3 (21 dpiui) 8/30: 1,929. 1st Ultrasound 9/4 - One perfect sac. 2nd Ultrasound 9/13 - Heartbeat at 124 bpm! Anniversary  

    image


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  • tryingyetagaintryingyetagain member
    imageMJC1116:
    imageSharon216:

    I'm sorry.  IF does completely suck.  There's really no other way to say it.  I am constantly pissed off that so many idiots can get pregnant at the drop of a hat but so many of us that truly want a child cannot.  

    This. Or that so many people who don't have to worry about their fertility constantly complain about it. And that they seem to have control over their fertility and I have none over mine. It makes it that much harder to deal with.

    For me it's also coming to grips with the fact that I have a problem. I never thought we'd be dealing with this, and the shock hasn't worn off. Not to mention, I feel like I'm letting my husband down. He's an incredible father and I fear I won't be able to give him more children. He's been great about it and tells me he loves me no matter what, but it's still a big downer. 

    I'm so sorry that you are feeling so down, but I completely understand how you feel. 

    This all sums it up for me too. I hate being such a failure. I have said that to a couple of people close to me, and they have said, "you're not a failure," but honestly, they are wrong. I am failing at this. And it sucks.

    I'm so sorry you (and all of us) are going through this! Why can't the people who would make crappy parents be the ones who are infertile?

    Me: 42. DH: 46.

    1st Pregnancy: MC, 11/19/00.

    2nd Pregnancy: DS born 04/10/06.

    3rd Pregnancy: CP, 03/11.

    4th Pregnancy: MMC, D&C 11/30/11, Genetic testing revealed Trisomy 4.

    5th Pregnancy: Ectopic, 2 doses of Methotrexate unsuccessful, surgery 4/10/12, right tube removed.

    Tried Letrozole January 2013-July 2013 (including 2 IUIs), all BFN.  After 2 1/2 years of trying for child #2, decided to "give up" after July cycle, based on AMA.

    August 16, 2013:  BFP our first month of "not trying!"  Still in shock.  Beta #1 (14dpo): 183.  Beta #2 (17dpo):  611.  Ultrasound 8/30/13: baby measured 6 weeks, 1 day, heart rate of 118 bpm! 
    Ultrasound 9/13/13:  8 weeks, heart rate of 176!
    Baby is due 4/26/14

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