- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Multiples
Help!
Twins are about to turn 4 months. They had a decent schedule and were napping ok, usually the swing would assist. Nighttime was also good, maybe 1 motn feeding. Now it's all gone to sheet. They fight the naps, wakeup after 30 or 45 min. Scream at feedings and tonight was rough going down. I follow babywise...feed about every 3.5 hours and do 3 naps plus a catnap before bed. Without catnap they could not make it to bedtime which is usually 7308. There wakeup time varies each day. When they wakeup at 5am I get confused what to do. Am i supposed to feed and put right back down or am I supposed to start the day? Today they woke at 530, put right back down and then i woke at 8. I was afraid to let them sleep too long and mess day up . I think this was wrong bc they weren't hungry at 8. All day long I kept feeding them at the wrong time bc they weren't napping long enough to get to the next feeding. I tried holding them off but it didn't work...1 ate but the other didn't. I also get panicked when they don't eat at the same time bc then I have 2 schedules...I'm so stressed out, and going back to work soon. What am I doing wrong??? I'm feeling awful and incapable these days. Poor DH is going to crack soon bc I'm driving him insane! Any thoughts?
6/20/11 mc @ 5wks
10/19/11 mc @ 17wks- Trisomy 18
IUI #1 4/26/12 BFN
Moving on to IVF in July
37 with DOR...fabulous
ER 7/14/12 6R 5F, ET 7/17 3 embies, beta #1 7/26: 147, beta #2 7/28: 326, beta#3 7/30: 422...ugh, beta#4 7/31: 607...hopeful, beta #5 8/2: 1280, beta #6 8/7: 7184 and u/s shows 1 possibly 2 sacs! 8/14 2 beautiful heartbeats! 9/24 we are TEAM BLUE!!!!!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Help!
We were following Babywise also, and stopped at 4 months, due to eating/sleeping issues that we felt were due to their schedule. We started following EASY and things have improved drastically over the past month.
Our schedule:
7am - wake up, bottle (E - eat)
7:30am - play time (A - activity)
9am - nap, lasts about 2 hours (S - sleep) (Y - your time)
11 am - E
11:30-1pm - A
1pm-3pm - S/Y (nap is about 2 hours)
3pm - E
3:30pm - A
5pm - S/Y (catnap - usually about an hour)
7pm - bottle, bath
8pm - bedtime
(we do a dream feed at 11pm because twin A needs additional ounces that he doesn't drink during the day and twin B can't sleep the night thru without it)
Hope this helps, it made a huge difference for us.
First off, hang in there mama.....4 months is notoriously bad for sleep! We also hit a huge regression at this time, and then went into teething....but now at 6 1/2 months (and two teeth each) we're on an even keel, w/ sttn and a predictable schedule during the day. So it will end one day!
The nap fighting, I think, is the worst part. I wouldn't allow them to be "up" after that 30-45 minute mark, though, as I knew it was not enough sleep (basically anytime they wake up not happy I count it as not a long enough nap and try to get them back to sleep). Some days the swing worked to soothe them back to sleep, sometimes I would walk them in the dark bathroom with the fans going, when they started being able to self-soothe I would just pat their tummies until they found their thumbs and went back to sleep (this was when the picking up and rocking wasn't working anymore, but just prolonging the agony). We had some rough weeks with this routine, but being consistent and making sure they were in "nap mode" until naptime was up helped a great deal.
I also follow the EASY pattern but allow for some flexibility as feeding times are consistent but nap lengths can vary a bit. I do make sure to feed them at the same time (which sometimes means waking up one baby to eat....if one baby wakes up before the other I'll give the other about 20 minutes of leeway but then he's getting up too....this doesn't happen often, though). My rule of thumb is 3 or 4 hrs between feedings (4 if they've had solids and a bottle), 2 hours from waketime to naptime. I think being strict about watching the wake-time is also important; even at 6 months, my guys can't handle more than 2 hours of being awake before they start melting down. And overtired babies = more nap fighting, screaming during meals, impossible to console, etc.
As far as wake-up times go, I usually judge it by when they went to bed the night before. We have a 7 pm bedtime, so I figure any time after 6 is reasonable to wake up. Before then, I do the pat-tummy routine and let them fall back asleep (unless they're screaming for a bottle).
Sorry I ended up writing you a novel; hope some of it helps and things even out soon!
6/20/11 mc @ 5wks
10/19/11 mc @ 17wks- Trisomy 18
IUI #1 4/26/12 BFN
Moving on to IVF in July
37 with DOR...fabulous
ER 7/14/12 6R 5F, ET 7/17 3 embies, beta #1 7/26: 147, beta #2 7/28: 326, beta#3 7/30: 422...ugh, beta#4 7/31: 607...hopeful, beta #5 8/2: 1280, beta #6 8/7: 7184 and u/s shows 1 possibly 2 sacs! 8/14 2 beautiful heartbeats! 9/24 we are TEAM BLUE!!!!!
this is and has been our method almost exactly as well! Except at 4 months we were doing feeds every 3 hrs instead of 4. And I just wanted to add that YOU ARE NOT DOING ANYTHING WRONG!!!! I can't tell you how many times I felt that way. I'm a problem solver and I have always been a high achiever and having twins is a challenge you can't always fix or master. Sometimes its just really really hard and you just have to muddle through the rough patches (as PP said 4 months is a notorious time for sleep regression). Know that your decisions are not wrong even if they might not work all the time. You just keep doing the best you can mama!! You are the best mom for your babies and be confident in your choices! You are doing awesome!
my advice is when they wake up at 5, feed them and put them right back down. treat it as if it's a moth feeding (dark as possible, hushed voices, no stimulation). We did this with the boys, and we did it with the girls when they were waking that early a few months ago. Now at 6.5 months, they have dropped that early morning wake-up and sleep 715-7am.
you aren't doing ANYTHING wrong mama! Having a kid is hard. Having two at once can be really difficult! You will get into the groove! I always followed the "EASY" method with my boys and it worked well. When my girls came along, I can't be as "schedule strict" with them because they are kind of just toted around depending on what the boys are up to for the day (camp drop off, pick up, school, sports, etc). So I usually end up waking them from naps, or they nap in the car, or wherever we are. But, I have two sets of twins...that's what works for me. I was a strict crib for naps, must be home for all naps with my boys. To this day at 4.5, they are still 3 hour nappers. With my girls? That just doesn't work with our lifestyle. I don't care where they nap, if they are in the swing, carseat during errands, etc. That's our life this time around. You will figure it out, promise!