When does this become fun?

eg214 · July 2013

Had my 1st u/s Wednesday and saw a healthy baby jumping around like crazy. I never got a chance to have an u/s with my last PG.

I saw the baby. Saw the heartbeat. Saw it moving around. Yet I still am not connected. I still don't believe. In the back of my head, I am waiting. As bad as that sounds it is the truth. Waiting for something to go wrong and next time, baby won't be jumping around. I hate this so much and so want to enjoy being pregnant, but as of yet, I just can't. Anyone else in similar shoes? I thought once I saw the baby it would feel real, but it felt like I was looking at someone else's body and baby. Now I'm hoping when I learn the sex, it will then be real. Finally.

mjester1 · July 2013

I honestly didn't feel connected until I was able to find the heart beat with my own Doppler. I hope it gets easier for you !

hollowway · July 2013

22 weeks with a healthy little girl... Still waiting for something to go wrong... I keep setting milestones for myself. See the heartbeat. Make it to 12 weeks. Hear the heartbeat on doppler. Make it to the anatomy scan. Now I'm waiting for viability. Who knows what the next will be. But for me, I need to have that goal of what's next.

I hope your PgAL brain hides for a little while.

ring_pop · July 2013

I'm not quite as far along as you but I'm definitely guarded when it comes to letting it sink in that I'm pg. I hope you start enjoying it soon.

Julieturner507 · July 2013

It's daily. I am also setting little milestones. Right now, I listen to baby's heartbeat with the doppler and I am looking forward to my anatomy scan in two and a half weeks. A friend asked me today about how old my baby will be when we come to visit her next year, and I honestly couldn't even think that far ahead. Today I am pregnant. Today my baby is healthy and growing. So today I am grateful. That's all I have.

emeraudecephiro · July 2013

Once I was in my third trimester, I really felt that wow, it's really happening and I'm going to have a baby!

bleusimp · July 2013

I still struggle with this. Feeling my little wiggle worm doing his flips and kicks helps a lot. When he is sleeping, I still get worried.

allurea · July 2013

it really took me feeling her kick on a regular basis for it to feel real.

Hope you feel connected soon *hugs*

eoub · July 2013

For me, it was a gradual process. Each reassuring milestone helps (heartbeat on the doppler, NT scan, A/S scan, starting to show, V-day, etc.). Movement was definitely a big milestone for me -- up until then, it still felt like I was kind of imagining the whole thing, and suddenly there's no ignoring all those punches and flips. With each of those milestones, I was able to enjoy the pregnancy a little more. And at some point, you have to just take the plunge and start buying things and it becomes a lot more fun and real.

But to be honest, I am a week away from my c-section, and it still doesn't feel 100% real. I think I just need to see him and hold him before it will really sink in!

katharine25 · July 2013

It's a gradual process, but for me also required a lot of mental work "forcing" myself to believe in it. Everyday, especially in first and early second tri, I tell myself, "today I am happy. I will worry about tomorrow when tomorrow comes." It was really important to me to enjoy the pregnancy; to revel in being pregnant. And for me it's worked. That's not to say there haven't been anixoety attacks and freak outs, and ive allowed myself to make big steps at my own time [there is Still not a crib set up in my house] but for the most part having a positive attitude about the future has enabled me to really enjoy the present.

lvlichelle · July 2013

I feel the same way...not connected. I am hoping when we find the heartbeat on the 22nd it will become more real..but, I doubt it since I heard the HB last time and still lost the baby. I just have a wall up and I don't know when it will come down.

Loveniz · July 2013

It was a gradual process for me. I had set small milestones in the beginning, but once I consistently felt movement it really hit me this is real. Now I love all his kicks, punches, and movement.....even when it may hurt or be uncomfortable. I can honestly say the third trimester is when my anxiety decreased a lot and now we are anxiously awaiting our little boy.

mightymousy · July 2013

equibabe611:
22 weeks with a healthy little girl... Still waiting for something to go wrong... I keep setting milestones for myself. See the heartbeat. Make it to 12 weeks. Hear the heartbeat on doppler. Make it to the anatomy scan. Now I'm waiting for viability. Who knows what the next will be. But for me, I need to have that goal of what's next.

I hope your PgAL brain hides for a little while.

This! At 18 weeks I'm still always holding my breath for the next milestone and incredibly anxious leading up to ultrasounds.

poohbear033 · July 2013

I'm sorry you are feeling that way. I will be 17w tomorrow and still don't feel connected to the baby. I keep thinking that maybe at my next appointment I will feel different. GL I am sure it will come to you when you are ready.

CNYBride05 · July 2013

For me, it never got much easier . I'm less than a week from induction and still worry all the time!

But I love my bump, my babies, and feeling them move. It is fun - just anxiety ridden.

GL!

CameroonKate · July 2013

I have been setting up little milestones to get to and then celebrate. Passing every milestone has made me a little more confident, but the PGAL brain never truly goes away. I am now starting to plan the nursery and window shop adorable baby clothes! You just have to sometimes force yourself to focus on the positive.

eg214 · July 2013

Thanks ladies for all your suggestions and thoughts on how you're dealing.

I've long surpassed my miscarriage milestone as I got my BFP and two days later had my loss. So, I'm about twice as far now. I just hate that everything can look so wonderful, great heartbeat, baby on target, and then BAM! That's probably what makes this suck so much for us all. Sometimes I wonder how it would be different if we didn't have a loss first. I wonder how excited I would be.

I'm glad to know I'm not a bad mom for not feeling connected. I'm doing this solo which is another reason I think this is really hard for me. I don't have a whole lot of support from family so it's just tough all around. A lot of uncertainty and stress, though I'm trying to keep it at bay.

Thanks again!

creativesoul83 · July 2013

lvlichelle:
I feel the same way...not connected. I am hoping when we find the heartbeat on the 22nd it will become more real..but, I doubt it since I heard the HB last time and still lost the baby. I just have a wall up and I don't know when it will come s

I heard the heartbeat with my last loss and week later nothing. I am 5 wk 4 days. I know i am pg I can feel it physically but not mentally. I am so grateful but feel still mourning.

The wonderful words the rest of you have said hit home and really help.

I just wish a healthy baby or babies to everyone here on pgal y'all are amazing

HopingforChange · July 2013

I am not sure. I am 18 weeks now, and I have good days and bad days. I did feel better when I started feeling kicking, rolling, etc somewhat regularly (around week 16-17 for me). However, some days I am still convinced that this will all go terribly wrong. I have a therapist now, and that does help. I hope you start feeling better, but, if you don't, know that it's normal. ((hugs))

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When does this become fun?

Re: When does this become fun?

"Dear Lord, I would have loved to have held my babies on my lap and tell them about You, but since I didn't get the chance, would You please hold them on Your lap and tell them about me?

BFP #4 6/26/13, EDD 3/8/14, Delivered @ 40w6d
Bethany Elizabeth born on 3/14/14 @ 6:48am weighing almost 8lbs 1oz and measuring 20 1/2 inches.

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Want a personalized experience?

When does this become fun?

Re: When does this become fun?

"Dear Lord, I would have loved to have held my babies on my lap and tell them about You, but since I didn't get the chance, would You please hold them on Your lap and tell them about me?

BFP #4 6/26/13, EDD 3/8/14, Delivered @ 40w6dBethany Elizabeth born on 3/14/14 @ 6:48am weighing almost 8lbs 1oz and measuring 20 1/2 inches.

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BFP #4 6/26/13, EDD 3/8/14, Delivered @ 40w6d
Bethany Elizabeth born on 3/14/14 @ 6:48am weighing almost 8lbs 1oz and measuring 20 1/2 inches.