Hosting a baby shower

StokedWifey · July 2013

Question for y'all: when you've thrown baby showers, how much have you spent?

I started planning a shower for a friend literally the day after she conceived. I knew it'd be soon after B's party, so I got serious on planning the details in February so I wouldn't be rushed. Another girl jumped in months later, after I had things planned and has completely taken over. I don't know the girl, so I've just sat back without saying anything.

She started doing all these things we didn't discuss, like a diaper cake with about 10 things off the registry (read $5-$10 a piece), and spent $40 on elephant cookies that look awful. I found out the cookies were twice what we budgeted yesterday, then an hour later, she told me she's making another kind of cookie.

She's spent over $200 dollars and that doesn't include the drinks, half the food, the flowers and some of the decorations. She expects me to split that with her! I'm a couponer, not because we're tight on money, but because I don't like spending it unnecessarily. I spent $200 on Bryson's party and decorated the whole house and fed $50 people We're feeding 22 and have spent about $250.

Also, this shower is at 1:00 tomorrow, when people have already had lunch and we have 5 savory items and now 4 desserts (if fruit and fruit dip are dessert). It's overkill and we're going to be stuck with a ton of food that neither host or the mom-to-be will eat.

Am I being ridiculous for being aggravated? I seriously dread going there tomorrow. Thank goodness lewispm is serving margaritas at Kellen's party because I'll need one after this shower.

ThePinkSuperhero · July 2013

That totally does sound annoying. That is always why I prefer to host alone! I like to make all the decisions, set the menu & budget, etc.

lnd1031 · July 2013

chipmunk112511:
I would give her the half you initially budgeted and tell her since she decided to go above and beyond and spend over she can eat that cost herself

This. ::mobile thumbs up::

StokedWifey · July 2013

chipmunk112511:
I would give her the half you initially budgeted and tell her since she decided to go above and beyond and spend over she can eat that cost herself

This is my thought process too. I'm so aggravated.

Thanks for making me feel better, girls! I thought maybe I was being a B.

JAck5209 · July 2013

chipmunk112511:
I would give her the half you initially budgeted and tell her since she decided to go above and beyond and spend over she can eat that cost herself

Definitely this. She can't spend frivolously and expect you to cover half. Put your foot down and have fun at the shower.

ashleynaka · July 2013

NO! You are just like me! I also coupon, but not so much out of necessity either, but I hate wasting money if I don't have to. I think if you had an understanding, but she is not sticking to the budget, then I would (in a very nice, political way) tell her that anything above and beyond is on her. It sounds to me like she has the funds if she is readily spending that much?

Just out of curiosity...is she a friend or relative? It sounds like you don't know her, so that should make it a little easier for her to understand your side. I would definitely talk it out though.

If you are anything like me, I am always the one who seems to be put in charge of things because of my skills at saving money. Somehow in the end, I end up getting taken advantage of financially because I don't want to seem cheap by not wanting to just pay for whatever. I feel your pain!

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