Nanny vs Daycare Question

Svenny1011 · July 2013

I'm a first time mom, due in November. I'm planning to go back to work, as being a SAHM just isn't for me. It will be part-time though, about 3 days per week, eventually going back up to 4 or 5 days.

We're debating between daycare and a nanny. All the daycares here have waitlists (surprise surprise!), and it isn't looking good for entry in early March when I'd go back (at least that is the plan). So it seems like a nanny is the route to go as an interim solution.

I know there is no ideal or correct plan for all this, but I feel like getting the baby on a decent sleep schedule and having more one-on-one interaction in the first year seems beneficial. But I'm totally clueless on all this.

Anyway, I'm curious.....

- Has anyone found any sort of study on the benefits on the baby's development with a nanny vs a daycare, if that even exists?

- Is there a more appropriate time to send an infant to daycare? The idea of sending a 4 month old kills me, which is further driving me towards the nanny route.

- Is there anything out there that talks about how going to daycare 5 days per week is bad? The one we really like up here only is open 4 days per week because they feel that 5 days is too much for a child to go.

Am I thinking about this too much or being irrational?! Input from all you experienced working moms would be appreciated! Sorry if these are stupid questions!

ZacksBride · July 2013

honestly, i think you are overthinking it. i am not aware of any studies comparing child development in daycare vs with a nanny.

with our first child, he went to daycare 5 days/week for about 10 hrs/day from the time he was 12 weeks until around 2 years old. nanny was not an option for us due to financial limitations at that time. he did just fine, and we absolutely loved our daycare. i thought that the socialization when he got older was wonderful for him.

we then used a nanny for about a year from when he was 2-3. the reason we changed was because we moved across the country from family, a nanny provided us the the flexibility in childcare that we needed at that time in our lives due to erratic work schedules. he adored our nanny, she wanted to be a teacher and was great about having daily lesson plans for him. ultimately she left us because she did find a teaching position. we took that as our cue to put him back in daycare, and he has been there for the past year. honestly, at this age i think a daycare setting is better than a nanny for the socialization aspects. he actually gets upset with me if i pick him up early because he loves interacting with his friends and genuinely loves being there.

i am due next week with baby #2, and he will be going to the same daycare as DS#1 starting when he is 6 weeks old. He will be there for about 10 hrs per day 5 days per week. i am not concerned at all because i know the daycare providers there and trust them completely.

The key is that you need to trust whoever is providing childcare for your child - be it a nanny or a daycare center. you will hear negative stories about both options. we happened to have a great nanny, however, i know several friends who had nannies that did nothing but watch TV all day long and had limited interaction with the child. same goes for daycare settings.

As for the daycare only being open 4 days / week, i have never heard of such a thing...

IBackBevo · July 2013

I don't know if there are any studies about daycare for infants, but I know there are studies that show early childhood education programs are very beneficial. Here in Texas, children can start school as young as about 2-3 if they qualify either due to economic hardship or disability. The economic hardship might only apply later, but I know I have seen children in PPCD programs as young as three. My Mother used to teach pre-k and I used to work in a PPCD program many, many years ago. I would think/hope that there has to have been some research or data that supports that this benefits the child in order for the state to assume the responsibility of paying for those extra years of education.

As for nanny versus daycare, I made the choice for a nanny simply because it is a better fit for our lifestyle. In other words, I don't have to worry about being at the daycare by closing time if DH or I both get hung up at our jobs, she helps with household duties/chores and I don't have to worry about getting DS out the door in the morning. But I also don't think that daycare kids are being neglected or is bad for them. Honestly, I even think that as they get a little bit older, there are aspects of it that are probably more positive than a nanny. We will probably put DS in either daycare or in some sort of pre-school when he gets to be about 2-3.

virginiagirl11 · July 2013

I don't have any research to give you but I will share my preferences and experience with you.

Due to the simple fact that we didn't get into our daycare until DS1 was a year old, he stayed at home with DH and with a babysitter during his first year. It was actually really great. I didn't worry about him being accidentally neglected or given someone else's breastmilk bottle and I knew he was getting constant attention and interaction in a loving, comfortable environment. DH worked from home on the days our babysitter was here, which meant he was able to train her and support her whenever necessary. He showed her how to work with DS and teach him new things and that was really valuable.

Once DS got into daycare at one year, we took him three days a week and kept him home with the babysitter two days a week. It was perfect for him. He got to socialize at daycare and experience a group setting and then got one on one attention at home. Plus, it gave him a chance to reset... catch up on sleep and eat really well since he didn't always like what was served at daycare.

At two, we now send him to daycare almost every day and he handles it just fine. However, I think that time at home really served him well because he seems to be very far ahead in the things we worked with him on at home, language development in particular. He also has escaped picking up a lot of the annoying habits that go around at daycare.

We just had another baby and just hired a long term babysitter for him with plans to do the same thing...keep him at home with DH and the sitter for the first year, then hopefully he'll get into daycare and can do 3 days a week there and stay home on the other two days.

Svenny1011 · July 2013

Thanks! My thoughts are to do a nanny until we can get into a daycare, which at this point (after talking with her today) is probably not until September. That would be about 6 months of nanny, then sending him to daycare at 10 months. I don't mind sending him to daycare, just not super early, which I assume is a totally personal thing.

Definitely appreciate the insight!

IBackBevo · July 2013

U might have a hard time finding a nanny for 6 months

Svenny1011 · July 2013

LibraryChica:
. I have never heard of a daycare being only open 4 days. The purpose of a daycare is to care for children while their parents work. Most parents work 5 days a week. That kinda annoys me, actually. It's ridiculous.

I know, right? We live in a weird resort community - things around here are generally so wonky, and it makes for annoyances. Clearly, this is one of them. I don't mind not working on Mondays, and my boss is okay with it, it is just very strange that it is their policy. Another weird aspect - Tuesdays are only for the children that are there 4x/week. That means that if you only want to go 3x/week, you have no choice but to go Wed, Thurs, Fri.

All that said, it is a highly regarded daycare and I really like their style and other principles. Definitely a pro / con weighing situation.

Want a personalized experience?

Nanny vs Daycare Question

Re: Nanny vs Daycare Question

Choose Another Board

Search Boards