Potty training question

My son just turned three last month and has pretty significant MERLD.  Like, conversations are just him pointing things out in the room (thats a green turtle) or saying he wants to "go bye bye in mommy car.  Go see grandma"  This is huge since he said no two word phrases or ANY verbs 8 months ago.  We have been doing great with private speech.  However, like other kids with MERLD, he usually does not understand much when being talked to (receptive) unless its something we have practiced A LOT.  And even that is very limited at this time.

My husband is pretty much the over-optimistic/borderline denial person between us. I know you are supposed to watch for cues that a child is "ready" for PT.  My son doesn't even acknowledge he is wet or pooped.  I comment on it while I change him and it doesn't seem to register.  Seriously, its the least of his problems.  However, despite finding a preschool in the fall that is ok with him in diapers (almost all in my area are not ok with this), my husband wants to potty train him.  This is great if he understood what you said to him, if you could bribe him, use a sticker chart, or if he would tell you he needs to go potty. 

I am sure some of you may have had success at PT  even with circumstances similar to me.  I just feel like its not his time yet.  My husband thinks since I am a teacher I have "THE WHOLE SUMMER" so why am I not taking advantage of this time I have?  He's being such a bully about it saying that people are going to start judging us as parents.  I think really he is more worried about himself than our DS.  My son not only has MERLD but also SPD and we are now getting private OT as well to get him to eat more than cereal, cheese, chicken, applesauce, rice and crackers. 

Another random question-- his poop is very soft and not an actual stool-- soooooo yeah.... don't know about that and potty training either.  The pedi was not concerned when I asked about it and blamed it on his diet. SIGH....

If you read all of this, thank you.... I just am at a loss.  My husband just can't handle his feelings some times, especially the days that are hard. We also just had a baby three months ago so thats adding extra stress too.

You girls can all relate.  I love DS to death and I want him to reach his potential, but I know its not for me or DH to decide how long things will take.  I want to hear the words "I love you mommy" but I know I will have to wait patiently for that too.