Disciplining a 16 month old

Sketchipyro · July 2013

For mobile users: Disciplining a 16 month old

I am at my wits end!!! I have no idea how to deal with the biting, the screeching, the hair pulling and the mulling of the cats. She thinks it's all fun and games but I am furious and don't know what to do!!!

MNgirl326 · July 2013

redirection, redirection, redirection. and consistency, consistency, consistency

LO is into something they shouldn't be - oh look at this instead

LO is biting, screeching, hair pulling- he gets put down and you walk away. She needs to see that negative behavior = no attention from mom.

Negative attention is still attention.

Also, she is 16 months old, make sure your expectations aren't too high. She doesn't understand many of the reasons for her actions, and she is learning cause and effect right now. So, make sure you aren't expecting her to act older then she is.

Finally one thing I did for the cat- was I set up the pack and play in the living room and when LO started being mean to the cat, I put him in the pack in play for a couple minutes. Kind of like a penality box, if you will. He got no attention when he was in there, and he would be In there for a minute or 2. THen when it was time to get out, I reminded him that we need to use gentile touches, for the kitty.

beth2882 · July 2013

I agree totally with the redirection, which often still won't work. My DD loves to put the dog's food in the dog's water or throw the kibble all over the kitchen or try to eat the dog food. Redirection does not work for that! So, I just end up picking up the dog stuff. With the cat (or in our case dog) we have this touch and feel book called Pat Them Gently which DD LOVES. So we use that to practice patting gently and she is MUCH better with the dog.

PrimRoseMama · July 2013

abartow:
redirection, redirection, redirection. and consistency, consistency, consistency
LO is into something they shouldn't be - oh look at this instead
LO is biting, screeching, hair pulling- he gets put down and you walk away. She needs to see that negative behavior = no attention from mom.
Negative attention is still attention.
Also, she is 16 months old, make sure your expectations aren't too high. She doesn't understand many of the reasons for her actions, and she is learning cause and effect right now. So, make sure you aren't expecting her to act older then she is.
Finally one thing I did for the cat- was I set up the pack and play in the living room and when LO started being mean to the cat, I put him in the pack in play for a couple minutes. Kind of like a penality box, if you will. He got no attention when he was in there, and he would be In there for a minute or 2. THen when it was time to get out, I reminded him that we need to use gentile touches, for the kitty.

This all the way.

KatFCo · July 2013

What have you tried?

In addition to redirection, make sure you use words to reinforce your actions. She pulls your hair, firmly (but not angrily) say, "No. That hurts Mommy" or something similar. She's old enough to understand what the word no means.

Sketchipyro · July 2013

We've tried redirection and telling her no (most of the time explaining why I'm telling her no). Her normal reaction is laughing and doubling her efforts. And then I end up angrily tell her no, which does nothing. And I have to walk away to regain control of emotions.

MNgirl326 · July 2013

Honestly I would try and cut out the word no. If she is hearing no over and over again, she is probably desensitized to it.

Instead of telling her what she can't do, tell her what she can.

We use gentle touches when petting kitty

Oh, we touch mommies hair softly

Use nice voices please

and if you are going to tell her what she can't do be specific

Please don't yell at me,

It hurts mommy when you scratch

And honestly, getting mad really doesn't help. You have to, and I mean have to find away to keep the emotions out of it. She is young, and she is learning through experimentation. She is learning what pushes your buttons. Believe me it is hard. But the less negative attention you can bring onto things, and keep things positive and consistent, it will get better.

Until it doesn't again - right now I am dealing with the "Why?" a million times a day. Seriously, try and read If you Give a Mouse a Cookie with the question "why" at the end of each. and. every. page. But I digress.....

Sketchipyro · July 2013

Thanks ladies. I knew how to care for a baby, it was instinctual. Seems like overnight she changed into a whole new little monster and found myself unprepared and clueless on how to handle it. Here's to a new day and attitude. Thanks again.

mrsshawnavanb · July 2013

Sketchipyro:
Thanks ladies. I knew how to care for a baby, it was instinctual. Seems like overnight she changed into a whole new little monster and found myself unprepared and clueless on how to handle it. Here's to a new day and attitude. Thanks again.

I totally understand this. DD is all of the sudden a crazy toddler and I was struggling with how to discipline such a young child as well. I bought "parenting with a purpose" and have just begun reading it.

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Disciplining a 16 month old

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