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Blended Families
Ooglybear
member
On a scale of 1 to "murderous rage"...
Ooglybear
member
On a scale of 1 to "murderous rage," how mad would you be? 
This discussion has been closed.
Re: On a scale of 1 to "murderous rage"...
Oh, for sure! And I am shaking my head at "as long as its not harmful"... What do you call putting an unnecessary hole in a child's body with possible complications including nerve damage?!? And what 12yo has been wanting a tongue piercing forever?
All of this!
This. I hope it's MUD.
This is definitely MUD. I actually LOLed at this.
Is it even legal for a 12yo to get a tongue piercing, even with parental consent? I know DH's stepbrother could not get one with parental consent at 17, and his actual mother took him with birth certificate and everything just to verify she was legit. He had to wait until he was all grown up at 18yo instead.
DH used to work at a tattoo place as a body piercer (he was licensed to do it at the time, and has since let it expire). I could ask him to find out for sure.
But even if it is legal, most shops have their own rules about things and will refuse people for certain kinds of body modification due to age even if it is legal, just to keep their noses clean. But I'm sure that's not how it is everywhere.
If it was a tattoo I would be very mad
Who is to say that this chick (if this is legit) took the little girl to a reputable place?
Tongue piercings done wrong paralyses the tongue and a 12yo is not old enough to make the mature decision of assuming the risk. You would not care if someone claimed to be you the Mother and allowed a place to shove a huge metal rod through your 12uos tongue because they close? Eyebrow holes close too but would likely scar her face. I would freak the F out.
And different states have different laws. And she might not be in the US.
I'd hope it's MUD.
But yeah, murderous rage. First at the piercing and second at being told by the gf that we need to sit down and talk about 'our child.'
On a semi-related note, when it is time to get DD's ears pierced, we are taking her to a tattoo/piercing establishment. We were thinking about taking her now-ish (she's 3), but I talked to a piercer who actually suggests parents wait until the kid is 12 or so. She said that because of the way ears continue to grow, you risk them looking all wonky if you pierce pre-puberty. I don't think we'll end up waiting that long, but it was a good enough reason for us to wait another couple years.
That's clearly MUD.
Every situation is different, but I think BM's and girlfriends need to take a backseat and allow the mother and father make such decisions for their child.
What?!?
I worry about this w my SD. I could totally see BM taking SD to get one at such a young age....
I was feeling pretty murderous when XH's wife took my 10 year old son to get his ear pierced. She tried to get DD1 to have her nose pierced at the time ("I'll do it if you do") but fortunately DD1 didn't go for it. I was livid that she did it, and even more livid that the kids were told to lie to me about it. Like I wouldn't notice when they got back to my house after their summer visit? Um, yeah.
DD2 took her stepsister to get her navel pierced for her 17th birthday. Not mom, not a relative, just some random girl (well, her stepsister) who was "of age" there with her at the time to get it pierced. Again, livid because I was used as the driver to drop DD off at her stepsister's work so they could go together to get it done. But even more livid that a place would okay a 17 year old getting her navel pierced without a parent in attendance.
So while it *could* be MUD, it also could be entirely plausible.