who says that to a pregnant woman?!?!

r0zz · July 2013

ok, so last night my husband and i had our friends over for dinner and after we had all eaten, i was sitting on the couch almost dozing off and my friend asked if i was ok cuz everybody else was fine and socializing and stuff and i said, "yea, i'm fine. the baby has just been making me tired and stuff all day." "and you don't feel nauseous or anything right?" [[my friend is super sweet and caring]] and i say no, she's giving me a break.

then her husband goes, "aww, i just thought of something mean." and we all ask out of curiosity and he tells us, "well you know the cure for all that is right?" "what?" "an abortion".

later on that night when DH and i are going to sleep i bring up what our friend said and we both agreed that we were highly offended. my husband even said that he wanted to punch him in the face and they have always gotten along fairly well. it's just bothering me to no end that he just says that kind of thing when he knows how much we love our baby and how happy we are to be having one. and i make it clear that whenever i have whatever kind of pains, ms or what have you that it's all worth it cuz it just means that my LO is growing.

this is my first child and i'm only a couple months in and all the crap i've been getting has mostly been about me and never my child and the fact that he said that, i just can't let go.

my husband and i have agreed to not see him for a while as we're both still pretty upset about it >:|

AGriffin620 · July 2013

Yeah, that was just flat out rude. I think I would need space from them, too, after a thoughtless comment like that.

WashingtonQueen · July 2013

Ummm, he refrained from saying it, mentioned that it was a rude comment and you pushed him into saying it. Get over it.

lifesaverz · July 2013

Nrg2020:
That's really sucky!!!! I think you need to talk to your friend about the comment before giving them space. #1. It will fester and make it more difficult to reconnect with them after you're done with "space" #2. They may not even realize they offended you. This may sound astonishing but if the guy could even say something like that then he's obviously clueless. I don't have a #3, just talk to your friend about how he made you both feel.

I agree with this, I would communicate to him that it bothered you.

PeachsMama · July 2013

melisx33:
WashingtonQueen:
Ummm, he refrained from saying it, mentioned that it was a rude comment and you pushed him into saying it. Get over it.
I agree with this. He straight out said it was inappropriate, but he was asked to tell everyone. I wouldn't spend too much energy being upset about it.  I would side-eye it and move on. 

Saying I have something mean to say is begging for everyone to ask. Its like saying "oh i have a secret!" no one just moves in from that. The natural response is "whats your secret?" He wanted to say it but wanted it to seem like he had asked first. I'd be beyond pissed. I probably would of flipped sht then.

backoffunicorn · July 2013

I'm guessing that everyone else was silent and they didn't laugh. It was a stupid comment and regardless of how it was said, he should've never said it.

amberrrjade · July 2013

Ew, what a jerk.

notkateanymore · July 2013

What a stupid thing to say. Not sure it's really offensive so much as just dumb and inappropriate.

lilypienmessimy · July 2013

Ya I can't believe someone would actually say that. I would definitely keep some space for a bit but consider telling him how you feel first, just like a few others said so that when you do see him again it's not awkward.

indiana101 · July 2013

melisx33:
WashingtonQueen:
Ummm, he refrained from saying it, mentioned that it was a rude comment and you pushed him into saying it. Get over it.
I agree with this. He straight out said it was inappropriate, but he was asked to tell everyone. I wouldn't spend too much energy being upset about it. I would side-eye it and move on.

Yup. Whatever he had to say was going to offend you, hence why he didn't say it until you pressed him. What mean thing would you have wanted to hear?

sfeebs13 · July 2013

I don't know. I can see it both ways.

He DID say it was mean and obviously knew it was inappropriate, but then again you did press him to tell you what it was.

You can't say, "Tell me, Tell me, I don't care if its mean!" Then get upset when you find out.

mag1carpetr1de · July 2013

I probably would have said something in the moment. But at this point, it's over. What a jerk.

nicholssquared · July 2013

I would eyeroll and move on. Just goes to show how tacky some people are and I would totally just write him off as a person and stop caring. Not worth the energy.

OnBabymaking226 · July 2013

melisx33:
WashingtonQueen:
Ummm, he refrained from saying it, mentioned that it was a rude comment and you pushed him into saying it. Get over it.
I agree with this. He straight out said it was inappropriate, but he was asked to tell everyone. I wouldn't spend too much energy being upset about it. I would side-eye it and move on.

Tend to agree with these ladies. While it was definitely a rude (and quite morbid) thought to share, after he mentioned he had a mean thought, it should have been left alone if you don't want to hear mean thoughts.

kittyh8r · July 2013

So rude. Some people have a crazy sense of humor. He may have friends that thought it was hilarious. I think it is tasteless and dumb.

One of my BIL's told me "sorry you're pregnant again" in a joking tone after I announced this pregnancy. I had a loss in January and I throat punched him...in my mind. Some people are idiots.

cambosoup · July 2013

YIKES. Are they having a hard time conceiving? Either way you flip the coin, that was rude of him to say. I would've said something back and maybe punched him in the throat.

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