Teen Moms

mikaela96 · July 2013

I'm sixteen, almost seventeen. My parents dont know I'm keeping the baby because they're trying to force me into an abortion. Anyways, are there any other teen moms on this?

zippyswoman · July 2013

I'm not a teen mom. But I did get pregnant when I was nineteen. This decision can only be yours. Do not let anyone coerce you into an abortion. You will regret it. Think about your future and your baby's. if you want to keep your baby, your parents can't tell you that you can't. You may be a minor, but you are now a mother too. I don't think it's a good idea tht you are have a baby at your age. But the decision is yours, and yours alone.

tfkre8ive · July 2013

I am not a teen mom, but my mom was. When she was 15 she and my dad had a baby boy and my grandparents forced her to give him for adoption. 18 months later I was born when she was 17 and they kept me. it was not easy and we were poor. i encourage you to talk to a counselor, at school, at planned parenthood, at an adoption agency, etc., to explore your options, all of which include parenting, adoption, termination. It's your choice and one you'll have to live with for the rest of your life. Talk to a counselor and make your own decision, don't let your parents force you. My mother has lived with 41 years of guilt and mental pain for allowing her parents to give my brother up. You need to make sure you're comfortable with your decision. Good luck with your decision.

keags5496 · July 2013

Hugs. Tough situation. I am not a teen mom but my cousin was. Like PP said, the decision is your, but make sure you're thinking long term. Sit down with someone and talk it out. If you chose to parent make sure you're aware of what you'll be facing and know that adoption could always be an option. Is the father around? Stable? What's your support system like if you choose to parent? How close are you to being done with school?

RondackHiker · July 2013

I'm sorry you're struggling. Car seat has good points. Your parents cannot medically force you to abort. You're a minor but this is your body and your choice. No doctor will do an abortion if you don't want one.

However they could force you by kicking you out. Start making a plan. Do you have anywhere else to go? Some Christian organizations may help. While I don't like that pregnancy centers will guilt mom out of an abortion she may want, there are ones that do provide assistance to moms.

Look into teen pregnancy support in your area. Google can help, your OB may know, and your school counselor a may know. Have a plan and tell your parents.

Crystal120410 · July 2013

Going to go against the grain here and agree with your parents. You are very young and don't fully understand the consequences of the choices you are making. I'm not saying abortion is your only option, there is always adoption. Coming from a IF background I know there are women dying to adopt that could give it a great life. It's not fair for your poor choices to impact your parents the way it will if you parent. Their responsibility is to raise you not you and your child that you irresponsibly brought into this world. The decision you make now will follow you the rest of your life but you should have thought about that when you made the adult decision to have sex.

kb3ll · July 2013

Crystal120410:
Going to go against the grain here and agree with your parents. You are very young and don't fully understand the consequences of the choices you are making. I'm not saying abortion is your only option, there is always adoption. Coming from a IF background I know there are women dying to adopt that could give it a great life. It's not fair for your poor choices to impact your parents the way it will if you parent. Their responsibility is to raise you not you and your child that you irresponsibly brought into this world. The decision you make now will follow you the rest of your life but you should have thought about that when you made the adult decision to have sex.

I really think you need to think before you type--"your poor choices" not exactly helpful or constructive at all...I agree she has other options but I don't think calling her choices poor is the way to go about telling her about her other options. How do you know she didn't use birth control and it happened anyway?

Regardless I agree with car seat check out your options, talk to a counselor and your parents before you decide. Good luck and I wish you the best.

LWhip11 · July 2013

Hey my love,
I am not a teen mom but have worked with them in the past, google mercy ministries and give them a call they will be able to give you some council and info even just over the phone. And please sweet girl don't let anyone make this decision for you, that is you're little precious babe and it's your body and the decision is COMPLETELY yours and yours alone. I am praying for you, I know it is such a tough situation, but remember even if you feel you aren't ready to parent, there is always adoption, so many families are in want of a sweet baby.
If you need to talk feel free to message me, I know it always nice to have someone not in the Fam to talk about things.
Lots of love.

OutOfStep81 · July 2013

RondackHiker:
I'm sorry you're struggling. Car seat has good points. Your parents cannot medically force you to abort. You're a minor but this is your body and your choice. No doctor will do an abortion if you don't want one.

However they could force you by kicking you out. Start making a plan. Do you have anywhere else to go? Some Christian organizations may help. While I don't like that pregnancy centers will guilt mom out of an abortion she may want, there are ones that do provide assistance to moms.

Look into teen pregnancy support in your area. Google can help, your OB may know, and your school counselor a may know. Have a plan and tell your parents.

Completely agree with all of this.

::hugs:: I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Hang in there!

Crystal120410 · July 2013

kb3ll:
Crystal120410:
Going to go against the grain here and agree with your parents. You are very young and don't fully understand the consequences of the choices you are making. I'm not saying abortion is your only option, there is always adoption. Coming from a IF background I know there are women dying to adopt that could give it a great life. It's not fair for your poor choices to impact your parents the way it will if you parent. Their responsibility is to raise you not you and your child that you irresponsibly brought into this world. The decision you make now will follow you the rest of your life but you should have thought about that when you made the adult decision to have sex.
 I really think you need to think before you type--"your poor choices" not exactly helpful or constructive at all...I agree she has other options but I don't think calling her choices poor is the way to go about telling her about her other options. How do you know she didn't use birth control and it happened anyway?
 
Regardless I agree with car seat check out your options, talk to a counselor and your parents before you decide. Good luck and I wish you the best. 

I disagree and do believe that she made poor choices. It was a poor choice to have sex when you know that a baby can be the product of that. On birth control or not pregnancy is always a possibility when you have sex. That's why when young people decided to have arc they need to be prepared for consequences that can come from it. No one here is even mentioning how her choices will effect her parents or the others involved.

kb3ll · July 2013

Crystal120410:
Crystal120410:
I disagree and do believe that she made poor choices. It was a poor choice to have sex when you know that a baby can be the product of that. On birth control or not pregnancy is always a possibility when you have sex. That's why when young people decided to have arc they need to be prepared for consequences that can come from it. No one here is even mentioning how her choices will effect her parents or the others involved.

I agree it is an adult decision but it's not a poor decision. Lots of people engage in sex in their teens...it's the norm now. It doesn't make it a poor choice by any means. Clearly pregnancy is always a possibility when you engage in sex but so isn't a car accident when you drive a car. I completely agree that she should look at all her options have it be keeping her baby, adoption, or abortion. I just really am irked by the way you presented your opinion. She obviously is being pushed in one direction by her parents when she feels a different way and is looking for advice--thus she already knows the effects of her choices and probably needs support and advice--not comments like you made a poor choice. Her parents are going to be a huge factor but so isn't any choice she makes for the rest of her life. I don't feel like arguing because again, I agree she needs to look into her options and make the right one for her...I just think the way you presented your opinion was wrong.

Crystal120410 · July 2013

kb3ll:
Crystal120410:
Crystal120410:

I disagree and do believe that she made poor choices. It was a poor choice to have sex when you know that a baby can be the product of that. On birth control or not pregnancy is always a possibility when you have sex. That's why when young people decided to have arc they need to be prepared for consequences that can come from it. No one here is even mentioning how her choices will effect her parents or the others involved.
 I agree it is an adult decision but it's not a poor decision. Lots of people engage in sex in their teens...it's the norm now. It doesn't make it a poor choice by any means. Clearly pregnancy is always a possibility when you engage in sex but so isn't a car accident when you drive a car. I completely agree that she should look at all her options have it be keeping her baby, adoption, or abortion. I just really am irked by the way you presented your opinion. She obviously is being pushed in one direction by her parents when she feels a different way and is looking for advice--thus she already knows the effects of her choices and probably needs support and advice--not comments like you made a poor choice. Her parents are going to be a huge factor but so isn't any choice she makes for the rest of her life. I don't feel like arguing because again, I agree she needs to look into her options and make the right one for her...I just think the way you presented your opinion was wrong.   
 

That's your opinion as we as this is mine. You say it irks you how I presented it well it really irks me how as a tax payer this is one more kid that will be on government assistance. If she chooses to keep this child she will have a very difficult time finishing her education much less continuing it. She is barely of age to work, how will she support herself and this child? I do believe it is a poor choice to have sex if you can't take care of the products from it. You say it's the norm now for young people to have sex, does that make it right? Does that make it ok for them to make this choice and everyone else suffer the consequences? Her parents are being realistic while she is being a 16 year old who thinks its going to be cute and fun to have a baby. There is a court case going on right now where the parents of a teen tried to force her to have an abortion. The teen went to court and the judge is making her parents cover all of her medical bills as well pay for her living costs all while not being able to have any contact with her. Now you tell me that's right? That was a poor choice made by a teenager that is now effecting her parents very negatively.

mikaela96 · July 2013

Crystal120410:
kb3ll:
Crystal120410:
Going to go against the grain here and agree with your parents. You are very young and don't fully understand the consequences of the choices you are making. I'm not saying abortion is your only option, there is always adoption. Coming from a IF background I know there are women dying to adopt that could give it a great life. It's not fair for your poor choices to impact your parents the way it will if you parent. Their responsibility is to raise you not you and your child that you irresponsibly brought into this world. The decision you make now will follow you the rest of your life but you should have thought about that when you made the adult decision to have sex.
 I really think you need to think before you type--"your poor choices" not exactly helpful or constructive at all...I agree she has other options but I don't think calling her choices poor is the way to go about telling her about her other options. How do you know she didn't use birth control and it happened anyway?
 
Regardless I agree with car seat check out your options, talk to a counselor and your parents before you decide. Good luck and I wish you the best. 

I disagree and do believe that she made poor choices. It was a poor choice to have sex when you know that a baby can be the product of that. On birth control or not pregnancy is always a possibility when you have sex. That's why when young people decided to have arc they need to be prepared for consequences that can come from it. No one here is even mentioning how her choices will effect her parents or the others involved.

My boyfriend is a marine and I have a job. I have every intention of moving out so my parents will not have to take on my kid. I'm going o graduate a semester early so I can be home with the baby, not my parents. I don't need you to make me feel bad when I get it enough at home. I was simply looking for someone else who's in the same boat as me. And I'm sorry you don't approve of my sex life..I'll be sure to get your input next time.

Crystal120410 · July 2013

car seat:
Crystal120410:
 That's your opinion as we as this is mine. You say it irks you how I presented it well it really irks me how as a tax payer this is one more kid that will be on government assistance. If she chooses to keep this child she will have a very difficult time finishing her education much less continuing it. She is barely of age to work, how will she support herself and this child? I do believe it is a poor choice to have sex if you can't take care of the products from it. You say it's the norm now for young people to have sex, does that make it right? Does that make it ok for them to make this choice and everyone else suffer the consequences? Her parents are being realistic while she is being a 16 year old who thinks its going to be cute and fun to have a baby. There is a court case going on right now where the parents of a teen tried to force her to have an abortion. The teen went to court and the judge is making her parents cover all of her medical bills as well pay for her living costs all while not being able to have any contact with her. Now you tell me that's right? That was a poor choice made by a teenager that is now effecting her parents very negatively.
I think you need to step away from this thread. I understand that you have very strong feelings about this but the fact is that you don't know this girl and you're making a lot of assumptions and saying some pretty shítty things. You're not achieving anything here. You're just ranting and you won't change anyone's mind or make any positive contribution this way.
Please just back away.  

If you think speaking the truth is shitty then you have a very distorted view of the situation. You have your opinion and I have mine but its just that opinions. One isn't more right than the other.

kb3ll · July 2013

car seat:
I think you need to step away from this thread. I understand that you have very strong feelings about this but the fact is that you don't know this girl and you're making a lot of assumptions and saying some pretty sh?tty things. You're not achieving anything here. You're just ranting and you won't change anyone's mind or make any positive contribution this way.
Please just back away.

You said this so much more eloquently then I was going to ...after her last post.

orchid8301 · July 2013

Crystal120410:
car seat:
Crystal120410:
That's your opinion as we as this is mine. You say it irks you how I presented it well it really irks me how as a tax payer this is one more kid that will be on government assistance. If she chooses to keep this child she will have a very difficult time finishing her education much less continuing it. She is barely of age to work, how will she support herself and this child? I do believe it is a poor choice to have sex if you can't take care of the products from it. You say it's the norm now for young people to have sex, does that make it right? Does that make it ok for them to make this choice and everyone else suffer the consequences? Her parents are being realistic while she is being a 16 year old who thinks its going to be cute and fun to have a baby. There is a court case going on right now where the parents of a teen tried to force her to have an abortion. The teen went to court and the judge is making her parents cover all of her medical bills as well pay for her living costs all while not being able to have any contact with her. Now you tell me that's right? That was a poor choice made by a teenager that is now effecting her parents very negatively.
I think you need to step away from this thread. I understand that you have very strong feelings about this but the fact is that you don't know this girl and you're making a lot of assumptions and saying some pretty sh?tty things. You're not achieving anything here. You're just ranting and you won't change anyone's mind or make any positive contribution this way.
Please just back away.
If you think speaking the truth is shitty then you have a very distorted view of the situation. You have your opinion and I have mine but its just that opinions. One isn't more right than the other.

You are so worried about her parents here and how that will impact them. That blows my mind. This young girl is going to grow up and have to live with her decision every day, whichever decision she makes. And she wasnt asking us if we thought she should terminate or not. This is just crazy to me. There are adult women that have babies everyday that probably do not fit your ideal mold of the perfect situation. We can not and should not go around forcing terminations. If you want to debate the amount of govt. assistance then that is a completely separate issue. This is about a young woman that is having to make a decision that will impact the rest of her life.

Brilyn94 · July 2013

I guess you could consider me to be a teen mom since I am 19. I have a very supporting family so I'm not going through having people wanting me to get an abortion, but ultimately it is your decision. I am going through a lot since I found out I'm pregnant but a couple months before we found out, my boyfriend at the time proposed to me and I said yes so now we are engaged and we go through days where we are scared about this situation but then other days we are happy about it. We had already planned that we want kids but this was a lot earlier than we planned. My family is pressuring us that they want us to get married before the baby comes but I'm not about to rush into everything all at once but anyways, I'm here for you if you need someone to talk to

mikaela96 · July 2013

car seat:
Crystal120410:
 If you think speaking the truth is shitty then you have a very distorted view of the situation. You have your opinion and I have mine but its just that opinions. One isn't more right than the other.
You're being really offensive and taking this extremely personally. It's not about you, and you don't get to tell another woman what she should do with the life of her child.
You need to back off. Your opinion is irrelevant. She's looking for advice, not judgement. 
Seriously, just go. 

Thank you:

kb3ll · July 2013

Crystal120410:
car seat:
Crystal120410:
That's your opinion as we as this is mine. You say it irks you how I presented it well it really irks me how as a tax payer this is one more kid that will be on government assistance. If she chooses to keep this child she will have a very difficult time finishing her education much less continuing it. She is barely of age to work, how will she support herself and this child? I do believe it is a poor choice to have sex if you can't take care of the products from it. You say it's the norm now for young people to have sex, does that make it right? Does that make it ok for them to make this choice and everyone else suffer the consequences? Her parents are being realistic while she is being a 16 year old who thinks its going to be cute and fun to have a baby. There is a court case going on right now where the parents of a teen tried to force her to have an abortion. The teen went to court and the judge is making her parents cover all of her medical bills as well pay for her living costs all while not being able to have any contact with her. Now you tell me that's right? That was a poor choice made by a teenager that is now effecting her parents very negatively.
I think you need to step away from this thread. I understand that you have very strong feelings about this but the fact is that you don't know this girl and you're making a lot of assumptions and saying some pretty sh?tty things. You're not achieving anything here. You're just ranting and you won't change anyone's mind or make any positive contribution this way.
Please just back away.
If you think speaking the truth is shitty then you have a very distorted view of the situation. You have your opinion and I have mine but its just that opinions. One isn't more right than the other.

Is it the truth? Did you interview every teen mom in America? Your being really judgy and assuming you know this girls entire situation...and you don't. This is HER choice. Not her parents, not the governments, and not yours. Your being mean and inconsiderate at this point. You're not changing anyone's opinions and just going on a witch hunt against every teen mom. This is not the place to rant about your problems with welfare and teen sex...feel free to start a thread if you want to rant about it...but give it a rest here. I'm personally done arguing with you...and will consider the rest of your comments hence forward ignorantly spoken about the situation.

ejq7239 · July 2013

Mikaela, I am a former teen-mom and my parents had a similar reaction to my getting pregnant at 16. My decision to parent my daughter was never in question in my mind but, as everyone has pointed out, it is very difficult to raise a child as a teenager (Ok, seriously, it is hard at ANY age) and there are options.

My husband and I have been together 9 years now, with an amazing 6-year old and #2 on the way. I am in my third year of medical school and he is extremely successful in his career. It can be done and it can be done well.

Some of the responses in this thread are absolutely distasteful and stem from what seems to be pure ignorance and a sprinkling of jealousy. I am sorry you are experiencing that and I wish I could say it won't happen again but it will. Just prove her wrong

Manyshoescannotchoose · July 2013

UO on this thread, I'm sure, and time will tell, but this post looks like MUD to me.

kb3ll · July 2013

Manyshoescannotchoose:
UO on this thread, I'm sure, and time will tell, but this post looks like MUD to me.

what does UO mean?

littlepig2 · July 2013

I'm not a teen mom but I agree with many of the other people here. I think you should talk to several people who are unbiased to form your decision. In the end, it is YOUR decision. Do not let people who have a certain view of teen mom's or abortion sway your decision. You need to think about what is best for you and for your baby. I'm sure your feelings will change day to day and I'm sorry that you're in a position where you are so unsupported by your parents but know that you have a lot of support here! Don't let negative people who are making assumptions about your life pressure you into any decision. While this may not be your ideal situation, you are the one who is in charge of your life and will ultimately be the one to live with the outcome of your decision for the rest of your life, regardless of what you decide to do. (said in the most supportive way and not negatively) ::hugs::

eecb01 · September 2013

zippyswoman said:

I'm not a teen mom. But I did get pregnant when I was nineteen. This decision can only be yours. Do not let anyone coerce you into an abortion. You will regret it. Think about your future and your baby's. if you want to keep your baby, your parents can't tell you that you can't. You may be a minor, but you are now a mother too. I don't think it's a good idea tht you are have a baby at your age. But the decision is yours, and yours alone.

19 makes you a teen pregnancy tho

becausemom · September 2013

I was seventeen when I gave birth to DS. I went through a lot to keep him, but it was one of the best decisions I've ever made. Every situation is different, but you have support (people to talk to) here if you need it.

kracosta · September 2013

I WAS a teen mom. I got pregnant with my daughter at 17 and had her at 18. My parents tried to talk me into terminating. Of course that was only something I could decide. Thankfully my parents "got over it" and were very supportive in the end. Well they supported my decision that is but I had to do it all on my own. And it was HARD AS HELL. We struggled. I don't regret having my daughter at all I am very thankful because believe it or not she had a very positive impact on me and my life. I am who I am because of her. That being said, being a teen mom is not fun nor is it cute. But it happens and u make the best of hand ur dealt. My daughter is almost 18, she's happy and healthy and will be graduating this year. I didn't do too bad and beat a lot of the odds, but not without the struggle. Good luck to you.

micaelasmakeup · September 2013

Don't be afraid to reach out for support and read and get information of your own. You made adult choices and now you will have to make adult decisions. But you can do it and we will be here to support whatever questions you have.
But I also have to point out that her being born in 96 which I assume from her sn, is that I and a lot of my friends are old enough to have her and we would be 32 year old grandparents. Mind blown;)

becausemom · September 2013

DreamingBabies said:
Y'all do realize this question was posted at the beginning of July, right? The OP hasn't been active in a really long time.

becausemom · September 2013

DreamingBabies said:
Y'all do realize this question was posted at the beginning of July, right? The OP hasn't been active in a really long time.

"I can not brain today, I has the dumb."

KelseyMeghan · September 2013

I am a teen mom, 18, and I'm almost 20 weeks pregnant. My family and fiancées family were not happy about me breaking the news about being pregnant, and did push for an abortion and then into adoption. I am keeping my baby, and plan on having my little family all together (: just remember that this is completely your choice.. No matter what! And even if it seems like everyone is hurt and isn't coming around to you being so young and pregnant.. Just know its just a phase and they will come around. Because it is your parents first grandbaby and great grandbaby for your grandparents.. They just want what's best for you, even tho this isn't how they imagined your life.. My family is starting to come around. Just stay positive and know that you can be a young teen mom, plenty of girls younger than you have done it! Keep your head up hun! And congrats!

JordyInIndy · September 2013

eecb01 said:

zippyswoman said:

I'm not a teen mom. But I did get pregnant when I was nineteen. This decision can only be yours. Do not let anyone coerce you into an abortion. You will regret it. Think about your future and your baby's. if you want to keep your baby, your parents can't tell you that you can't. You may be a minor, but you are now a mother too. I don't think it's a good idea tht you are have a baby at your age. But the decision is yours, and yours alone.

19 makes you a teen pregnancy tho

@eecb01 why did you bump a thread that's 2 months old?

micaelasmakeup · September 2013

Why did it get bumped? Did someone search teen mom or lurking way back. I wasn't paying attention to the original post...

Want a personalized experience?

Teen Moms

Re: Teen Moms

Choose Another Board

Search Boards