- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Working Moms
BabyNewbury2012
member
Working Moms with 2 or more children or second on the way....
BabyNewbury2012
member
in Working Moms
I am a full time working mom with a 15 month old daughter. My husband and I always wanted more then one child. We have talked about it lately but are both scared. Our daughter is very easy and has been since birth, she is healthy,she sleeps great, eats great, is very happy and content. I guess one thing that scares us is we will end up with the exact opposite (I know there is no way to predict this lol). Although she is super easy, evenings can be crazy, picking up form daycare, cooking, eating cleaning up, bath...etc. We wonder how crazy it will be with 2. We are pretty comfortable financially but obviously if we only had one we could provide more.
We love our daughter and love our family. We love the idea of increasing our family, another child to love, a brother or sister for our daughter to grow with. We are just scared. One friend told us if you wait until your ready or not scared you'll never have another...lol.
Were you scared when deciding to have the second? How much more crazy is your life?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Working Moms with 2 or more children or second on the way....
I would give it another year before deciding. Trust me, I was in your shoes when DS1 was 15 months!! ::points to ticker below::
I also thought I had an easy baby when DS1 was born. DS2 has been easier actually! (well, except for his recent sleep regression, but that's attributable to the three teeth breaking through at the same time!)
GL!
Don't rush into it. We started trying when DS was about 2.5. DD was born when he was four. She IS the exact opposite of easy going like DS was. So for us, the timing has been perfect in terms of having a DS that is a bit more independent and helpful.
I feel like it hasn't been too much crazier. Obviously, the baby stages are a lot more work than a four year old so it does require organization and patience. But it is doable. Our nights are well planned. I usually get home between 5 and 5:30. We eat together at about 6pm with the exception of when DS has swim class at night. On those nights, I do dinner with DD and DH takes care of DS. DD is in bed by 7pm every night.
We think that we are done, but I am not against considering another. However, it won't be for at least another two years, even with my advanced maternal age.
My desire to have more than one child far outweighed any fear I had about how life would change. Obvioulsy since I now have a second
For us, transitioning from 1 to 2 was FAR easier than 0 to 1. DD1 is a pistol of a child and has been since birth. At 2 1/2yo she still doesn't STTN and requries a lot of energy. DD2 is as chill as can be and has fit into our family routine with little hiccups.
Our life is pretty busy but not insanly busier than it was pre-DD2. An extra load of laundry, bottles/meals to prep, another diaper bag to pack...but we're already used to that stuff with DD1 so it doesn't seem as insane as it was with DD1. I'm used to the exhaustion, I know how to balance work and family, and with DD2 being easy it just works.
Now if DD2 had the same personality this would be a totally different post!
No advice yet but I'm scared... I just figure everybody else does it it can't be that bad!!
And as always - i remind myself, "This too shall pass".
I think the crazy young years will go by fast and before we know it we will have teenagers!
We always wanted to have at least 2 children. I was 22, married, working full time, in school, and had a 1 1/2 year old. We decided to just go for it. We were financial stable and honestly, I feel that there is no "right time" to have a baby because a baby is going to uproot anything that you have going on. There is a never a time in your life that is "perfect" for a baby to fit in. We decided to stop worrying about it and get pregnant.
Like others have said, it is definitely WAY easier going from 1 to 2, than 0-1 because you already have an idea of what parenthood is like. We were lucky and both DD and DS are very calm and are amazing sleepers. The chances of your children being completely opposite are there, of course, but that chance is there regardless if you wait or not.
Go for it!
Edited for spelling.
I have 2 kids 18months apart, DD is almost 3 and DS is 15months. Honestly it's not much harder with 2 than 1, and in some ways its easier because they have each other to play with. It is challenging in the beginning juggling work, pumping, BFing, all the newborn stuff, and also caring for a toddler. But its a short time period and now that they are old enough to play together its really great. My biggest problem is not that I have 2 kids, but that my DH works too much and isnt around much during the week to help. I do all daycare dropoffs and pickups myself and do dinnertime and bathtime by myself. If your DH is able to split the work with you, I bet it would be almost easy lol.
And if you are scared now, then get pregnant quick before you know what you're in for with a 2 yr old haha, just kidding... kinda. But seriously, your friend is right, you'll never "be ready". You need to look at the long-term picture of your family, not just the short-term "how will i manage a baby and a toddler". Seeing my 2 kids together and how much they love each other, I can't imagine not having that. I don't think you'll ever regret having a second child.
We waited till DD was 2.5 before we started trying, and we had DD2 right around the time DD1 turned 3.5. It was a little easier since she was older and could help us out a bit. She was fully potty trained, and could do almost everything herself. it will be a little easier when DD2 is off bottles and we can do breakfast in the morning, but we make it work. Some days are tough and it's crazy in the mornings and evenings, but I don't regret it. I love watching the girls play together.
Routines are key, as is an equal partnership with DH. We work together to make sure things get done.
I would say Jump in and DO IT. We had the same question for YEARS. And i was so afraid that i wouldn't have the love for two children....how managable our lives were right now....etc.
I can say.....OUR LO is the LIFE of our family. He has brought so much life, love, excitement to our lives. I was scared ...questioned my love etc...and the moment i saw him....We all felt nothing but love and complete.
Dont wait. Just do it.
I was scared my entire pregnancy on how I was going to juggle working full time with two little kids- I gotta say once you get the grove it's not that bad. I highly suggest taking as much time as you possibly can for maternity leave; don't rush going back to work. I took the maximum 12 weeks and was so happy I did because it gave me time to adjust to 2 kids, once I got a handle on that I was okay with adding work into the swing of things.
The weekdays are crazy with day care pick ups and drop offs- but you get used to it and it becomes the new normal.
our life really hasn't changed with 2. We both need to leave the house by 6:30 so we each bring a child out to the car. I was home until DS was 6 months and I'm home by 3, so I think that all makes things easier.
They are 23 months apart. I love the age difference because DD is so cute and sweet with DS, although she's also too rough at times. It was annoying having 2 in diapers for a few months and DD woke up a nasty mess for close to an hour after her nap my whole maternity leave. Any time I needed to give the baby a bottle she'd want a bottle and to be held too. It was very difficult at times, but I love having 2 so little so I wouldn't have changed it.
If you want to go an easier route, now that she's over 3 she can dress herself, put on her shoes, brush her own teeth, go to the bathroom by herself. This all started in the past month and I could see where having a newborn now would be 100 times easier.
My kids were opposite. Fortunately, it was DD1 that was a terror and wouldn't sleep. DD2 was a breeze in comparison in the infant years. Which was timely, bc DD1 was going through her terrible 2 & 3's phase. I don't want to go through that phase again.
It's all worth it. I love watching the girls play together-far more often then fighting. I hope they continue to maintain a close relationship through adulthood.
DS was 3 years 3 months when DD was born. Going from 1 to 2 wasn't too bad, BUT, I'm glad we waited until he was 3.he was potty trained, can pretty much dress himself and can climb into his car seat himself. It's just that little extra bit of independence that makes it a little easier.
I will say that DD is much more laid back than my first. I joke with my DH that if we had her first, they would be closer in age. DS rocked my world and I needed two years to think about it lol.
And yes, if you wait until you aren't scared you will never be ready. Just dive on in! It doesn't last forever.
I got pregnant when DD was around 16 months old? I honestly can't remember haha. They are exactly 26 months apart, and I stopped working when DD1 was 18 months old. I just got back into work, and it's pretty hectic, but it's fun.
I think whether your a working mom or a SAHM, your life gets hectic when you add another baby into the mix. But, I would ignore your friend. Wait until you are ready. When the time comes, you'll know.
Someone recently asked me if I knew the old saying "One is none and two is 10"? I hadn't ever heard it before but it totally describes my life with 2.
One was great, two is hard. I woudln't change it for the world but its TOUGH!
So far it has not been much harder but there is almost no "me" time. DD2 is only 4 months and I think when she gets mobile it will be harder. The only time it was much harder so far is when DD1 has been sick and clingy.
My girls are 2.5 years apart.
BFP 11/09 - DD 7/10 - BFP 8/11 - M/C 9/11 - BFP 6/12 - DD - 2/13
Yes, I was scared. But life is not much more crazy. The first 6 months were VERY rough, then got a bit easier when DD finally started taking naps at 7 months.
DS was not an easy baby, but has been a somewhat easier toddler/preschooler. He has never been a great sleeper.
DD was colicky for the first 6 months. It was horrible. She screamed.all.the.time. And never slept. She is much happier now, and I think in some ways a pretty easy 1 year old, although not consistently STTN.