How do I keep my toddler in her room?????

JCB104 · July 2013

My LO is 27 months old and has never really slept in her room continually. However now that my husband and I are thinking about having another one we feel that she needs to start sleeping and staying in her room. She is in a toddler bed, I lay her back there when she falls asleep but within hours she is trying to get in our bed. We either sleep with her (on the floor in her room) or we are so tired we just scoop her up and let he sleep with us.

We have tried everything, we thought it was the mattress (maybe to hard) but last night we put her bed in our room and she slept all night in her bed.

I bought a gate that I was going to try at her door so she cant get out but I don't want her to cry all night.

Any suggestions????? Ideas??????????????? Thoughts???????

I really want her to be comfortable in her room and sleep in there..

Spin313 · July 2013

If she's never consistently slept in her bed, then it's going to take time to get her used to it. Every time you give in and take her to your bed, you make it harder on everyone.

Do you have a crib? Perhaps she isn't ready for a toddler bed.

Otherwise, before you try the gate, let her pick out a special item: stuffed animal, lovey, blanket, flash light...see if that will help.

juliane2004 · July 2013

I promise she won't cry ALL night. I think, at 2+ years, CIO is a fine option. We close the door (as we have since they were newborns), and put a plastic baby proof handle thing, so they can't open the door.

I really think it's unnecessary for any parent to have to sleep or lay with their child for an hour (or more!) just to get them to sleep. You just can't keep that up with more than one child, so for me, I never let that be an option, since I knew I didn't want to continue with that for ever.

Cherryblossoms07 · July 2013

Spin313:
If she's never consistently slept in her bed, then it's going to take time to get her used to it. Every time you give in and take her to your bed, you make it harder on everyone. Do you have a crib? Perhaps she isn't ready for a toddler bed. Otherwise, before you try the gate, let her pick out a special item: stuffed animal, lovey, blanket, flash light...see if that will help.

I agree.

PepperBug · July 2013

The book "Healthy Sleep Habbits Happy Child" has been my bible since my first was four months old. The book offers two suggestions. One is locking her door, which it sounds like you don't want to do. The second is every time she comes into your room, one of you walk her back to her bed and ruck her in without interacting with her. You may have to do it a hundred times the first night, but supposedly within a few days, many kids don't get out of bed any more.

I don't know if it works. My son is almost three and never gets out of bed. Instead, he goes through phases where he calls out for mommy for hours before falling asleep. I used two methods from the book to combat that, but unfortunately, with most gentle methods, any change of routine means starting all over again. Good luck!

jc&cat · July 2013

PepperBug:
The book "Healthy Sleep Habbits Happy Child" has been my bible since my first was four months old. The book offers two suggestions. One is locking her door, which it sounds like you don't want to do. The second is every time she comes into your room, one of you walk her back to her bed and ruck her in without interacting with her. You may have to do it a hundred times the first night, but supposedly within a few days, many kids don't get out of bed any more. I don't know if it works. My son is almost three and never gets out of bed. Instead, he goes through phases where he calls out for mommy for hours before falling asleep. I used two methods from the book to combat that, but unfortunately, with most gentle methods, any change of routine means starting all over again. Good luck!

I agree with the previous post that if she is not used to ever being in her room, it's going to take a while. The inconsistency is showing that she is going to win if she throws enough of a fit. When we moved DS to a big boy bed in his big boy room about 3 months before DD arrived, it was a few weeks (3) of walking him back to his bed with no loitering around once he was tucked in. What we tried was to say we will be on the other side of the door. That was for 2 nights, then it was on the step (few more nights) and then eventually he was comfortable. He would call for us (are you on the step??) and then that was fine.

Is there a reason she is in a toddler bed vs crib? The interaction i described was with DS at just over 2.5 years. I would have kept him in a crib longer i DD wasn't coming!

KateLouise · July 2013

When we did it with DD1 (and we had the same situation of never having slept in her own bed all night, and around the same age) we did what the other ladies suggested of walking her back to her bed.

But for the first two nights, one of us got into her bed with her, so she was getting used to sleeping in her own bed the whole night. Then we spent a couple of nights sitting and patting her back to sleep, before leaving. Then a couple of nights just tucking her in and walking out. She was all sorted within a week.

BeanNut · July 2013

juliane2004:
I promise she won't cry ALL night. I think, at 2+ years, CIO is a fine option. We close the door (as we have since they were newborns), and put a plastic baby proof handle thing, so they can't open the door.
I really think it's unnecessary for any parent to have to sleep or lay with their child for an hour (or more!) just to get them to sleep. You just can't keep that up with more than one child, so for me, I never let that be an option, since I knew I didn't want to continue with that for ever.

I agree with this.

Also, for techniques to help ease the transition to sleeping all night in her bed, I like the Happiest Baby Guide to Great Sleep.

driveshorses · July 2013

juliane2004:
I promise she won't cry ALL night. I think, at 2+ years, CIO is a fine option. We close the door (as we have since they were newborns), and put a plastic baby proof handle thing, so they can't open the door.
I really think it's unnecessary for any parent to have to sleep or lay with their child for an hour (or more!) just to get them to sleep. You just can't keep that up with more than one child, so for me, I never let that be an option, since I knew I didn't want to continue with that for ever.

All of this, but mainly the bold part. She will knock on the door in the morning when she is ready to come out, and before that she will just play with her toys while waking up at her own pace.

However, this is all easier said than done. She has never slept with us, and has always slept in her room, in her own bed, since the day she came home from the hospital.

Work up to it, you're going to be tired, but just keep putting her back in bed. Once she realizes she can't come out of her room, she will go back to bed, it'll just take some time though. Toddlers are much smarter than what a lot of people think! Good luck!

KMEss86 · July 2013

Instead of letting her sleep in your bed, what if one of you slept in her bed.. until she falls back asleep? That is at least half way there. She is staying in her room, and becoming more comfortable with it, while still being comforted. This is what we do for my son, although he is in a full size bed, so its a little easier. Now he sleeps all night alone about 50% of the time.

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