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Twins first then singleton

JordynLeighx3JordynLeighx3 member
in Multiples
How did you guys adjust to having twins and then a singleton? I'm nervous that number 3, if only one this time, will struggle with the attention that the twins get and whatnot. I know this is not a huge issue but I worry about baby number 3 feeling like a "third wheel" especially if we have another girl.
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Re: Twins first then singleton

  • BabyCarryingVesselBabyCarryingVessel member
    No experience, but I'll be watching for other's responses! We know that we want a third some day, but it'll probably be another two or three years before we think about that. I was floored one day when my SIL actually told me "You CAN'T have a third because that baby will feel left out!" Um, really? Thanks for making that very personal decision for us. Go away.

     

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  • JordynLeighx3JordynLeighx3 member
    imageBabyCarryingVessel:
    No experience, but I'll be watching for other's responses! We know that we want a third some day, but it'll probably be another two or three years before we think about that. I was floored one day when my SIL actually told me "You CAN'T have a third because that baby will feel left out!" Um, really? Thanks for making that very personal decision for us. Go away.


    Ugh. Rude! I know how that is, my SIL is worse than the MIL hah!
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  • NikkdamNikkdam member
    That baby will have two very doting sisters and any newborn will get the attention so I would say go for it!
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  • LucyRicardo3LucyRicardo3 member

    well, I'm not completely there, yet, but we do know for certain that there is only one in there this time. I'll admit, it's sort of a strange feeling to only see one on the u/s, "almost" a bittersweet feeling. I don't know how to explain it. I'm totally blaming the hormones for that emotion.

    But, I had the mommy guilt of "third wheel" when I was pregnant with the twins, that my oldest daughter would somehow feel left out, etc. She's quite the strong willed child, though, and seems to get along really well with DD3, who is also a strong extrovert. DD2 would rather be alone, anyway. My son is a bossy big brother/mother hen. It's amazing to watch the sibling dynamic develop and I can only imagine how much more things will change when Cinco gets here.

    Best of luck to you!


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  • kegkeg member
    My older DDs are 4.5 now and my singleton is 3 months. I think it's great!  Of course, there is a ton of adjustment, but the twins do dote on their little sister and I think it will get even better the more she can interact.  Also, the twins are at an age where they play really well together so they can just do their own thing when I'm taking care of the baby as opposed to feeling like I need to entertain an older sibling more.  Of course there are times when all three want me and/or crying which is tough, but overall I think it's good.  Also, have a singleton baby seems like a breeze after you've done twins!
    2004-Started TTC; Nov 2007-Lap with endo removed; Jan 2008-Ectopic (mtx); April 2008-IVF #1 (bfp, twin girls); March 2011-FET (cp); June 2012-IVF #2 (bfp, singleton, EDD 3-19-12)

    ***Twin fraternal girls born at 35w6d in 12/2008***

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  • AmyJoy728AmyJoy728 member
    If we decide to go for #3 (which we still aren't talking about since DH is going in to his 4th year of law school at night while working full time) I'm hoping that it'll be like PP said. Easier to only have one newborn and the boys can play together instead of me having to entertain a single child. Though they will probably still be fighting for toys LOL
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  • megs2011megs2011 member

    We aren't talking about this yet either because my girls are only 9 months old and DH says he only wants 2 but I think it would be a lot easier to have twins then a singleton. I watch my friends with their babies and older child and they have to try to entertain the older one while dealing with baby. At least our twins will play together.

    I'm hoping I get to experience this one day but for now I sit on the fence trying to figure out which side I'll end up on.

                              

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  • arobert123arobert123 member

    In a word, I would describe life with three as LOUD! :)

    It can get pretty dang crazy around here.  Most days the twins are more work than the baby.  They have had some major regression since the new baby arrived.

    I have just accepted that this will be a very challenging year with 2 defiant toddlers, a baby and now going back to work full time  The twins watch too much TV, eat too much mac and cheese, the house is a mess, the volume of laundry is mind-blowing, and there is an unidentified gross smell in the mini van.  But, it's not forever!  I know a year from now things will be much, much different and hopefully more manageable.

    Its also tons of fun - lots of giggles and there are plenty of hugs and kisses to go around.  If nothing else, its been really cool getting to experience "just one" infant!  I totally recommend it :)

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  • xoexpatxoexpat member
    Mine are only 9 months but I am definitely pining for a third. DH is not so sure. Im hoping its still just too early for him to make that call. I would think that if the twins are around 4 YO and could go to daycare or something it would work out well.
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