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need advice please

shellmom22shellmom22 member
in Attachment Parenting

My little girl is now two months.  DH works over-nights so I bed share with DD at night.  This is working really well for DD and me.  During the day I have been trying to get her to sleep in her crib.  This has not been going very well - she would prefer to sleep in my arms. She will only sleep 10-30 minutes in the crib vs 60-90 in my arms.

I love spending time with her and I want her to know I am there for her but DH hasn't been doing his chores very often so I have my chores plus his plus taking care of DD.  We moved mid December and I never got to finish unpacking before she was born and the house is a mess.  It is becoming a bit overwhelming.

  I just feel that when she's awake I should be playing with/taking care of her.  I have a ring sling I use when we're out and occasionally at home but she does not like to be in it in the kitchen so I can't cook or do dishes. 

Does anyone have any advice on what they do for naps and how they get housework, etc. done?

Tia

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Re: need advice please

  • ToastieSimonsToastieSimons member

    Give it time.  

    DS1 napped in my arms until 11 months old.  He refused to nap in his crib.  I worked harder on getting him to be happy while awake.  I would put the bouncer in the kitchen/living room and pop music on and dance while cleaning or sing to him.

     

    Sometimes I would just swaddle him and put him in the swing with some  white noise on.  As he got older I would use a play gym or a blanket with toys on it for him to roll around and find.

    Basically I cleaned in 5-10 min increments.  He slowly learned to be happy playing by himself for maybe 15-20 minutes and I managed to get our house "tidy".  Never sparkling clean.

    The biggest thing I did was make a cleaning schedule to get the most out of my power sessions.   

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  • RoryorHenry?RoryorHenry? member
    It definitely gets better. I let the house go a bit when dd was that little. She didn't nap well in the crib either we have since gotten rid of the crib because we never ended up using it!

    I am now more able to get things done around the house during the day but it is really hard in the beginning. Things that helped me:

    I realized I was staying at home to be a mom and not a house cleaner. If I was at a job and dd was in daycare than no one would be cleaning the house, cooking meals, doing laundry, etc. during the day. My job is to hold, feed, cuddle, comfort, and play with my daughter.

    When my husband came home I would ask if he wanted to do the laundry, dishes , etc or play with the baby. He would usually play with the baby and I could bang out some chores.

    We ended up getting a house cleaner twice a month. I don't know of you can fit it into your budget but if you can it is totally worth it! Now I pick up but I don't ever really clean. I know the floors, bathrooms, and kitchen will be cleaned every two weeks. At first I felt bad about this but my then my husband reminded me that we chose for me to be at home so I can take care of our daughter not so I could clean.

    Also, my daughter is much better in carriers around the house now. I have a woven wrap and I can wear her on my back now which makes cooking, picking up and doing laundry so much easier.
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  • cpmichcpmich member
    imageRoryorHenry?:
    It definitely gets better. I let the house go a bit when dd was that little. She didn't nap well in the crib either we have since gotten rid of the crib because we never ended up using it!

    I am now more able to get things done around the house during the day but it is really hard in the beginning. Things that helped me:

    I realized I was staying at home to be a mom and not a house cleaner. If I was at a job and dd was in daycare than no one would be cleaning the house, cooking meals, doing laundry, etc. during the day. My job is to hold, feed, cuddle, comfort, and play with my daughter.

    When my husband came home I would ask if he wanted to do the laundry, dishes , etc or play with the baby. He would usually play with the baby and I could bang out some chores.

    We ended up getting a house cleaner twice a month. I don't know of you can fit it into your budget but if you can it is totally worth it! Now I pick up but I don't ever really clean. I know the floors, bathrooms, and kitchen will be cleaned every two weeks. At first I felt bad about this but my then my husband reminded me that we chose for me to be at home so I can take care of our daughter not so I could clean.

    Also, my daughter is much better in carriers around the house now. I have a woven wrap and I can wear her on my back now which makes cooking, picking up and doing laundry so much easier.

    This exactly. Also 2 months is very little. She will probably nap better in a carrier as she gets stronger. I like the buckle carriers myself for napping. An infant Kinderpack is a nice option.

    Also the fisher price rock n play sleeperwas great for us as a brief place to put my son down so iI could shower, do laundry, etc. It was rreally light so I just moved it around the house if I needed to do something while not wearing him. He actually didn't mind it. He napped well in it on occasion.
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