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VENT...

timnerintimnerin
in July 2013 Moms

Ok so my MIL is starting to watch my son on Tuesdays and Thursdays but my dog just had surgery to remove a lump y'day.  I'm working form home to make sure he doesn't scratch out the stitches and she's here watching my son.  It's great having her here and he loves her to pieces... here's where the issue comes...

 My DH and I do not get along with his sister for many reasons but basically we think she's crazy and don't trust her with children.  So today while eating lunch my MIL tells me she's going to go to her moms my DS goes to nap and her daughter will come over so if he wakes up she can watch while i'm on meetings for work.

 I'm not ok with this!  I responded to her and said don't worry about it just go i'll deal with it.  She said well he loves to play with her and if you have meetings you need someone here.  Ok it's to the point that I would cancel my meetings if needed to not have her here.

 The bigger concern I have is that she will do this while DH and I are working on Tuesdays and Thursdays and not tell us and I'm definately not ok with this.  I'm not looking forward to the WW3 I will cause within the family if I voice my opinions but I'm at the point where I think I have to....

 Ok - Vent over, needed to get that off my chest!

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Re: VENT...

  • PrimRoseMamaPrimRoseMama member
    Stand your ground. If you are not cool with this then hire a sitter and ban them both from watching your child.

    Your SIL because you don't trust her.

    Your MIL because you can't trust her to listen to your wishes and follow your rules.

    Honestly, I'd tell them both to forget it, cancel my meeting and look into alternative child care. The minute my caregiver ignores my wishes openly is the minute they get to hit the pavement.


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  • timnerintimnerin
    imagePrimRoseMama:
    Stand your ground. If you are not cool with this then hire a sitter and ban them both from watching your child. Your SIL because you don't trust her. Your MIL because you can't trust her to listen to your wishes and follow your rules. Honestly, I'd tell them both to forget it, cancel my meeting and look into alternative child care. The minute my caregiver ignores my wishes openly is the minute they get to hit the pavement.
    the worst part is she just started watching on Tuesdays and THursdays yesterday! He goes to a daycare center on MWF...  I'm thinking DH needs to talk with her tonight and let her know.  Honestly I don't even want sister here with MIL when I'm not.  I don't trust her to the point where I think I need to lock up my valuables if I'm not here!
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  • jackson290721jackson290721 member

    imagePrimRoseMama:
    Stand your ground. If you are not cool with this then hire a sitter and ban them both from watching your child. Your SIL because you don't trust her. Your MIL because you can't trust her to listen to your wishes and follow your rules. Honestly, I'd tell them both to forget it, cancel my meeting and look into alternative child care. The minute my caregiver ignores my wishes openly is the minute they get to hit the pavement.

    Yes 

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  • shani0112shani0112 member
    imagePrimRoseMama:
    Stand your ground. If you are not cool with this then hire a sitter and ban them both from watching your child.

    Your SIL because you don't trust her.

    Your MIL because you can't trust her to listen to your wishes and follow your rules.

    Honestly, I'd tell them both to forget it, cancel my meeting and look into alternative child care. The minute my caregiver ignores my wishes openly is the minute they get to hit the pavement.

    This! Absolutely! I do not allow my biological mother to see my kids without mine or DH supervision and this means my brother doesn't get to take my kids places bc I know my mother would try to come along. I love my brother and he sees my kids all the time but he's not taking them anywhere.
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  • SplashingFishySplashingFishy member

    imagePrimRoseMama:
    Stand your ground. If you are not cool with this then hire a sitter and ban them both from watching your child. Your SIL because you don't trust her. Your MIL because you can't trust her to listen to your wishes and follow your rules. Honestly, I'd tell them both to forget it, cancel my meeting and look into alternative child care. The minute my caregiver ignores my wishes openly is the minute they get to hit the pavement.

    So much this. If you can't count on her to respect your wishes (except maybe the occasional treat or grandma spoiling) she can't watch your kid. Just the fact that she would suggest that and have the planned without checking with you would worry me enough to not let her watch in the future. 

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  • Erinm278Erinm278 member

    imagePrimRoseMama:
    Stand your ground. If you are not cool with this then hire a sitter and ban them both from watching your child. Your SIL because you don't trust her. Your MIL because you can't trust her to listen to your wishes and follow your rules. Honestly, I'd tell them both to forget it, cancel my meeting and look into alternative child care. The minute my caregiver ignores my wishes openly is the minute they get to hit the pavement.

    I agree with this.  I will not allow certain members of DH's family alone with my child.  Either myself or DH will have to be supervising if these certain people are around my child (MIL isn't enough).  Your kid, your rules.


     

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  • M0ONM0ON member

    imagetimnerin:
    imagePrimRoseMama:
    Stand your ground. If you are not cool with this then hire a sitter and ban them both from watching your child. Your SIL because you don't trust her. Your MIL because you can't trust her to listen to your wishes and follow your rules. Honestly, I'd tell them both to forget it, cancel my meeting and look into alternative child care. The minute my caregiver ignores my wishes openly is the minute they get to hit the pavement.
    the worst part is she just started watching on Tuesdays and THursdays yesterday! He goes to a daycare center on MWF...  I'm thinking DH needs to talk with her tonight and let her know.  Honestly I don't even want sister here with MIL when I'm not.  I don't trust her to the point where I think I need to lock up my valuables if I'm not here!

    So, her very first day watching him, she's already trying to bail to go do something else just because he's sleeping? That in itself is pretty telling of how well this arrangement is going to work out. 

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  • summerchildsummerchild member
    imagejackson290721:
    imagePrimRoseMama:
    Stand your ground. If you are not cool with this then hire a sitter and ban them both from watching your child.

    Your SIL because you don't trust her.

    Your MIL because you can't trust her to listen to your wishes and follow your rules.

    Honestly, I'd tell them both to forget it, cancel my meeting and look into alternative child care. The minute my caregiver ignores my wishes openly is the minute they get to hit the pavement.
    Yesnbsp;

    Agreed. Especially since you believe the sister is crazy and you don't trust her around your kid. This is a sucky situation all around. What does your DH say?
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