I try to use these boards to learn, or to support others who need a friendly word. However, today I need to rant. Actually, I think I just need to cry it out.
This morning was IUI#3. I didn't like RE's timing. Again, I had to see a different RE because mine is off due to surgery. So I had monitoring US yesterday, and had 2 follicles, one 19 and one 16mm. I took Ovidrel at 2 pm yesterday. However. I felt like I was not ready to ovulate yet. No CM changes, no + OPK, and no ovulation pain. I am pretty good at tracking my symptoms, and I am almost never wrong with OPKs. I only use 3 a month at this point. I also found that the clomid makes my O later than normal; usually day 15 or 16 instead of 14. Well, we did IUI#3 today at CD 13. I tried asking RE to compromise and do it tomorrow, but he didn't agree.
So we had a long ride to the hospital and had to leave the house at 6am. Last night, DH (who is normally wonderful and wants a baby more than I do) went out with friends. He came home BOMBED at 1am. I mean, I think he had at least 10-12 drinks. He apologized, and I tried not to turn it into a big fight, but we had to leave in 5 hours, so I was pretty upset.
This morning comes, and he gets up without too much of a hangover, and was pretty good for the ride down. I drove. Well, when it came time for IUI, his post wash count was low. I mean, seriously low. RE said that we would still do it because it was greater than 2 million and motile, but DH normally has greater than 65 million. I seriously blame last nights bender. And as upset as I am with him, he is even more upset with himself. And he got pulled over for speeding on the way home,literally 2 minutes after I told him that he should slow down. Thank the powers in heaven that the cop let him go with a warning.
So now, I am just way down in the dumps. I know we have my parents' generous donation and an appointment for IVF consult next week. And I know that we are by no means calling it quits. I just don't have anyone to talk to about this. I don't want to tell my facebook world that my DH was a lush and now he's not performing up to "speed". I also still feel mad but I'm trying to protect DH's feelings and not put a barrier in our marriage.
Sorry for the rant. I hope everyone else is having a better day.
Re: Very bad IF day. IUI#3 didn't go so well.
I'm sorry you had a bad IUI day. I think we have all had days like that. Our IUI 3 was horrible as well. Huge accident where we had to stop and help the guy before rescue got there. RE yelled at us for being late even though we called. DH numbers lower than normal. 1.2 million. They wanted to continue with the IUI even though the numbers were super LOW. That is when I switched RE's I began to think that they were just in it for the money.
TTC since July 2011
BFP #1: 2/15/12-Ectopic/Mtx at 6 wks
BFP #2: 10/12/12-m/c at 5 wks.
Me: MTHFR, Low AMH (1.1), High NK cells and Antiphospholipid Antibodies.
IVF with ICSI in August 2013 brought us our babies. ER-9R, 7M, 4F w/ICSI ET of 2-Grade 2 blasts.
Dx shortened cervix, PTL, and preeclampsia during pregnancy. Lots of medications and 13 weeks of bedrest, babies were born healthy at 34w4d!
DX: Unexplained
BETA #1 59 BETA #2 148 BETA #3 283 BETA #4 2,783! US at 6w2d shows 1 bean measuring right on track! HR 121. US at 8w3d measuring on track HR 177. Released form my RE. EDD 12/28
***3T July Siggy Challenge: Favorite Summer Drink Peach Bellini***
Me: 36, DH: 41 TTC: Feb 2011
Dx uterine fibroids & MFI = Varicocele causing decreased SA
*** 12/2011: IUI #1 50mg Clomid = BFN ***
*** 8/2012: IUI #2 100mg Clomid = BFN ***
*** 11/2012: IUI #3 150mg Clomid & Metmorphin 150mg = BFN ***
*** 1/2013: Changed RE's & Urologists for more focus on MFI ***
*** 4/2013: IUI#4 Femara & Follistim = BFFN ***
*** 5/2013: IUI#5 Femara, Follistim & Bravella = BFFN ***
***6/2013: Taking a much needed break***
Me: 06/12 Dx w/ IR PCOS (rx 2000 metformin) DH: SA all clear; looking good
06/12-10/12- Clomid/Femara + trigger + TI + P4 = 3 BFNs, hysteroscopy, polypectomy, D&C
11/12 - 7.5 mg Femara + trigger + IUI + P4 = BFN
12/12 - Surprise BFP ectopic (MTX 01/13)
04/13 - Off the Bench! 7.5 mg Femara + trigger + IUI #2 + estradiol + P4 = BFN
05/13 Clear HSG-5 mg Femara + Menopur + trigger + IUI #3 + P4 = BFP ectopic (MTX 07/03 & 07/11)
07/23 emergency lap to remove ectopic mass and left tube
Thank you all for the kind words and support. DH and I backed this up with a little more BD, and I plan on doing the same for the next 2 nights, because I'm pretty sure that I would probably O on Saturday! I will get the most from this cycle as I possibly can!
And DH feels terrible, and if there is one thing I have learned in marriage (this being my 2nd), is that it is super important to forgive and support your spouse. Ok, he screwed up but I love him and I don't want him to be hurt. So I made my point, and now we move on.
Hope everyone has a wonderful day.