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August 2012 Moms
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No gifts

alakealake member
in August 2012 Moms
I know it may be weird but we have asked for no gifts. We are flying home four days after her birthday. She doesn't need anything. We just have invited them for dinner and some lawn games. I have her present back home, but might pick her up something small. I know my parents and grandparents are going in together and getting a swing set for the kids for our cabin. I have gone in with them. We bought a bigger one, so the big kids can use it. It isn't really a gift for her, but for everyone. My aunt is finding it strange. What are your thoughts.
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Re: No gifts

  • Manda-KayManda-Kay member
    I don't think it's strange; very practical.  People may still buy her gifts even though you asked for none.


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  • jessalynn521jessalynn521 member
    My birthdays were all no gifts please per my mom.  She didn't want us to care about presents or expect them. I am no worse off because of it. 
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  • Amjones52Amjones52 member
    We are asking for contributions for a time capsule ( that L will open when hes 18) in leiu of gifts...
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  • Keoh1215Keoh1215 member
    I know a bunch of people who do this, I don't find it strange at all. Some kids just don't need any more toys or parents don't want to deal with them! I have also heard of people who make it known the toys will be donated to charity.
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  • alakealake member
    I told my aunt if she wants to help my parents to pitch in, or get her something we can leave at the cabin for next summer. It isn't like we aren't coming back.
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  • Manda-KayManda-Kay member

    imageAmjones52:
    We are asking for contributions for a time capsule ( that L will open when hes 18) in leiu of gifts...

    such a cute idea!!



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  • beckyfarrellybeckyfarrelly member
    We were recently invited to a 1st bday party that said best wishes only or a donation to her education fund. I thought that was a great idea!
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  • allardrallardr member

    not strange, we asked no gifts too. We're flying home for her 1st bday so not practical to tote gifts back, and it's the first time most of our family & friends will even meet LO. I care more about time spent with her than gifts. I'm sure many will bring them which I'm fine with I just didn't want them to feel like they have to (you know the whole I dont' see you much but then invite you when a gift is generally given). 

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  • fastcarsandfreedom3319fastcarsandfreedom3319 member

    Yep this is us too. We're flying back to see the family across the country for LO's birthday and last time we went, we needed an entire extra suitcase to tote back his gifts.  It was so nice and generous of everyone, but seriously a pain for us.  I'd rather you not get him anything, or at least have it shipped to our home instead.

    I don't think it is strange or rude at all; I think it is totally practical. Besides, LO won't remember this birthday anyway.

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  • Tula214Tula214 member
    When myself and SO visited his family in N.Y. they threw me a "surprise" baby shower. Whoever planned it asked people to keep gifts small, or get me gift cards because we were flying. Im so glad they did because i packed my bag to the max not knowing I was coming home with stuff.

    Point is, I see why you asked for no gifts.
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  • Reilly626Reilly626 member
    For 1st birthdays here its money, usually 50 to 100 dollars that goes towards college. So yes to gifts. I had a friend who got clothes and she was overwhelmed at the off sizes and amount and I would see why you would say no to gifts.
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  • sosophsosoph member

    Well, gifts are the giver's to give. And, gifts aren't about what LO needs - that's your job as a parent. I hate being asked for/suggested to give money. I always think, cut back on your own lattes if that what you think your kid really needs. Are the clothes and toys what I would have chosen? Not necessarily, but then it's one less outfit I have to buy and I can put that $in a college fund if I want to.

    That said, I keep a running list for each kid of current sizes and things they might like. If someone asks (grandma always does), I send it along.

    In your case, however, given the travel, I think spreading the word about no gifts is okay. 

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