Success after IF

IF Rears Its Ugly Head Again!

DH and I aren't actually trying. We're just not preventing, thinking "Well we're infertile, and we'd want another one anyway, so whatever happens happens". For a while we weren't ready but figured we'd make it work. Well now I do feel ready. We're still not trying/not preventing, but every time I realize it's technically possible I get all.. hopeful. And I analyze symptoms and think "ooo what if!?". I know I'm going to get my hopes dashed again. And again. We have 3 frosties but were waiting to see what my kidneys do. We're pretty religious and kind of operating under "Well it's so incredibly unlikely that if it happens it's meant to be".

Is anyone else in a similar position? I really thought it would hurt less after I had one, and for me... it doesn't really. I know that sounds awful. I don't mean to or want to. I just... still have those wounds. And I guess I wanted to vent/look for solidarity? :)

Me (32) DH (30)

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Re: IF Rears Its Ugly Head Again!

  • I'm not in the same position, as we only ever wanted one, but I think the IF feelings never really go away. Hugs.


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  • TJ1979TJ1979 member
    Huge hugs! I'm in a similar boat. We are trying, but the completely ok fashioned way. No charting, no temping, no meds. I know there's almost zero chance of it happening. And yet I somehow have stupid high hopes that I know will get crushed month after month. I don't think the IF pain ever goes away.
    TTC with PCOS since November 2009
    IUI#1 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP, m/c
    IUI#2 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 5-9) = BFN
    IUI#3 Femara/Ovidrel (cd 3-7) = BFP!
    beta #1 11/23 = 270, P4 = 75
    beta #2 11/28 = 2055
    Our daughter E was born 7/29/2012!
    Surprise, our 2nd daughter P was born 5/22/14!
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  • kmc84kmc84 member
    We are not there yet, but we decided that I won't go back on any BC after I am done BFing. We would be so happy if I got PG without much effort. DH does not want to do IF treatments again. I'm afraid that I will get to a point where I will want to do treatments. IF sucks.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    TTC# 1 since 5/10
    Me:34 Type 1 Diabetes, Ankylosing Spondylitis, Hypothyroid DH:35 Perfect
    DX: Unexplained IF
    Many IUI's with various meds all BFFN
    IVF #1 11/11 canceled due to OHSS
    IVF #2 Feb/March 2012 ET of 2 on day 3 4/7 BFP! 5/1 u/s blighted ovum
    IVF #3 July 2012 ET of 3 on day 3 7/24 BFP!
    Healthy baby girl born at 36w4d on 3/9/13

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    TTC #2
    IVF #4 May/June 2014 ER 6/4 18R 8M 8F ET 6/9 1 blast, 2 frosties
    Beta 6/18 BFFN

    FET of 2 blasts 7/24...BFP!
    Healthy baby girl born at 36w3d on 3/17/15

    TTC#3
    IVF #5 June 2018- PGS planned, no surviving embryos
    IVF #6 August 2018- ET of 2 on day 3 - Chemical pregnancy
    IVF #7 August 2019-....?
  • We are officially trying without preventing. I got my first PP period Memorial day weekend. So I haven't had my hopes dashed yet, since I haven't had a full cycle. We are staying with my parents for a few weeks due to a massive house project. I'm not expecting much this month due to our accommodations. We don't have frosties, so it would be a start over from the beginning IVF cycle. Sigh. 

    Hugs to you. IF sucks.  

    TTC Since 3/2010
    Me-36, Unexplained Infertility, DH-35, all clear
    Clomid 50mg 12/2011 = BFN
    Clomid 100mg 1/2012 = BFN, with Cyst
    IVF #1 Lupron/Menopur/Gonal-f/HCG Trigger
    ER 4/19/12 = 11 retrieved, 6 fertilized,
    ET 4/22/12 = 2 transfered (day 3), remaining 3 weren't good enough to freeze
    Beta 5/3 = BFP, 87 Beta #2 5/7 560.9 Beta #3 5/9 1376.5 First u/s One Baby, 125bpm!
    Second u/s, 176bmp! Kicked over to the OB by the RE at 8w. Team Green!! 
    Baby girl J arrived two weeks early! Born into water, med-free. Hooray for Team Pink!

    TTC #2 - back to the RE, treatment started 12/2014. 

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  • It's impossible for us to get pregnant naturally due to Dh's retrograde ejaculation, yet I still get excited when I see EWCM and I get sad when AF comes around.  And this has all occured during the last two cycles after having my triplets.  Yes, call me crazy, but I'd already love to try for another baby and I hate that it's not possible without doing a FET.  I think it's all part of wanting what I can't have (an unassisted pregnancy) and will probably never go away.

                          

    PAIFW/SAIFW

    DS1 born July 2002 (previous marriage).

    TTC since Oct 08. DH Dx w/testicular cancer March 09.
    MFI due to retrograde ejaculation/azoospermia.
    5/2 IVF #1 cancelled due to large follie.
    6/14 start Lupron for IVF #1.2. 6/22 start stims.
    7/4 ER and Biopsy.
    7/9 Transferred 2 (1-4BB and 1-3BB) embryos.  4 frosties.
    7/15 +HPT 6dp5dt. 7/18 Beta #1: 193. 7/20 Beta #2: 415.
    8/10 1st u/s - It's triplets!

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  • Ms H13Ms H13 member
    We're definitely not planning to use BC ever again - like most everyone here, the odds of us having an oops baby is slim to none.  And we would be overjoyed if that happened.  We still have 2 frosties that we will use during a FET cycle at some point, if they don't take I'm not sure what our path will be.  GL to you.
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  • I think I?m in a pretty similar situation?kinda?. We got pregnant with DS on a break cycle and had decided long before that we would never use BC again. After AF came back I was hopeful that we would get PG again on our own, and we have twice, but neither have stuck. Now I?m more convinced that DS really was a fluke and that we will have to go back to the RE, but I don?t want to. The only times I?ve ever gotten pg have been naturally, but there is obviously something wrong with me.

    It doesn?t hurt less for me either and I also thought that it would after I had one. In fact,  now I sometimes feel greedy for wanting another.


    After 4 years, 3 failed IUIs and 2 failed IVFs our surprise miracle is here!
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    My Blog

    TTC # 2 BFP 03/02/13 = CP, BFP 05/14/13 = CP, BFP 08/09/13 = CP

    RPL testing = normal

    TI Cycle #1, 50 clomid days 3-7, 150 iu Follistim days 8-11 = BFP! EDD May 22, 2014

    Betas: 13 DPO = 79, 15 DPO = 149, 19 DPO = 788, 22 DPO = 2031

  • IF never goes away, at least not for me.  I've had TWO amazing surprise BFPs while being overseas and away from our frosties.  Despite having 3 perfect, perfect girls, I was still crushed when our recent FET didn't work.  I am sure this sounds horrible to many of you and I might have wanted to throat-punch you myself about 5 years ago.  However, I'm committed to our frosties and hate to lose any of them, especially after storing them for so long and even shipping them across the country.  We have always believed in keeping and using them.  And DH seems to think he has super semen now, but it is just not so and I've already said that if the next FET is unsuccessful, he is getting a SA immediately.  I am not going to stress myself out through every cycle, trying for one more, wondering what his count, morphology, motility looked like.  It is just too miserable.


    Me – 33 (no diagnosis), DH – 41 (MFI)

    IVF #1/ICSI 2008 – 22 ER, 21 F, Day 3 transfer (8A and 8B) - BFP, 3 Frosties

    Surprise BFP 2010

    Surprise BFP 2011

    Shipped frosties from TX to VA in 2012

    FET #1 May 2013, single blast – BFN

    FET #2 August 2013 2 blasts – BFN

    IVF #2/ICSI/AH Jan 2014 – 8 ER, 7M, 6 F Day 3 transfer (grade 2 & 3), no frosties - BFP!



  • Im right there with you. I was hoping we would conceive on own and got my hopes up each month but when it didnt happen I was bummed that treatments were inevitable. Damn it!!
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