Can't help.......

Re: Can't help.......

• BrittianyM member

  June 2013

  BrittianyM:

  Can't help but think about all the things we never get to do or see with our baby girl. It's not right or fair. All I want to do is hold Brooke in my arms not just my heart. 

  
  

  Today my hubby and I were taking a nap and all of a sudden we both got woken up by the sound of a baby crying. I guess it was on the tv but it was the first time that I have woken up and for a brief second thought she was still here. The realization was hard just like it is all the time. 

  
  

  Still am not sure how to continue on without our precious angel or why we even have too. Tomorrow is going to be hard. Brooke has a gift to give her daddy for Father's Day. Just won't be the same without her.

   

   And the icing on the cake is we just got Brooke's Death Cert today with thr cause "unknown". What a way for my hubby to spend his first Father's Day weekend.

  Brooke Elizabeth born Feb 17, 2013 grew wings May 9, 2013 @ 11 weeks & 4 days old from SIDS

   

   

  

   

  

   

  

   

   

  

  Report0 Reply
• Loading the player...
• cawettig member

  June 2013

  I am crying for you reading your post. I feel the same way. None of us understand why and we never will be able to. The pain of not holding your baby girl is unbearable. It kills us when we think of the what ifs and what we missed out on. DH and I are just not even thinking that it is fathers day. DH is still a father to our baby angel but it hurts him to much to think about it. We seem to get things on milestones. On our one month anniversary we received her remains back, on our two month anniversary we received her death certificate in the mail. I do not know how these things happen but it just adds to the pain. I am sending you hugs, I know how bad you are hurting. I hope today you and your DH can support each other and remember the precious to short of time you were able to be with her...

  
  

  Julius Justin - 11/07/2002 - 10 lbs 22 in 

  Isabella Genavieve - 02/03/05 - 7 lbs 11 oz 22 in 

  Arianna Kaitlynn - 04/10/2013 - 4 lbs 15 oz 15 in

  
  

  BFP 08/10/13 

  TWINS!!!! 09/01/13

  Miscarriage at 12 weeks lost baby B 

  Arianna diagnosed with an Ompalocele at 13 weeks

  Arianna our Angel on 04/10/13 

  BFP 07/20/13

  Our Rainbow due 03/18/14 

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  

  Report0 Reply
• JessicaG220 member

  June 2013

  I am so, so sorry.  It is so incredibly unfair.  I cannot even imagine the pain you must feel after knowing your sweet girl in the flesh for 11 weeks.  I never knew my baby girl alive.  The only memories I will ever have with her in this world are of her limp in my arms, and that is hard enough for me.  I wish I could say something that will magically take your pain away.  Unfortunately the only true way for life to get easier is for time to pass.  Father's Day and Mother's Day suck this year.  I contemplated getting my husband a card, but I thought it would seem more cruel than heartfelt.  Facebook is plastered with happy messages to husbands from my friends with kids or friends that are pregnant.  God, it hurts.

  Take comfort in the fact that you are not hurting alone.  We are all hurting, especially today.  I am thinking of you and I hope you can get through the day with support from loving family and friends.  Hang in there!   

  Ava's Story
  

  BFP#2 10/18/13  Blighted ovum 11/25/13

  BFP #3 1/31/14 EDD 10/18/14 -- It's a GIRL!

  

  Report0 Reply
• EcoStreet member

  June 2013

  Praying for you in this hard moment and for all of us who know your pain. Praying to get some piece and ease the heavy hearts we have.

   

  Report0 Reply