Letter to the Editor *update

Twinkler2011 · June 2013

A big shout out to 2mamaz for writing an amazing letter for me! Seriously probably wouldn't have done it without her for fear of sounding like a fool. Thank you so much to her and the rest of the board for all of the support! Below is the letter, I sent it in today. I will keep everyone updated on anything that comes of it.

Dear Editor,

Recently, my partner Amanda and I purchased a summer Family Pass from the Troy Aquatic Center to cover us and our three children. However, when we went in to get our photos taken, we were told we did not qualify because we are not married. The worker stated the rules for the family pass required marriage; we explained that legally, marriage is not available to us in Ohio. She responded, ?Well then you are no different from a boyfriend/girlfriend situation.?

We are not unlike many heterosexual families in Troy. We?ve been together about 5 years. We have two daughters (5 and 6) that were mine from a previous relationship, and two months ago, Amanda gave birth to our son after a year-long struggle with infertility. We share our home and money. We work hard and pay our taxes. We sit down together for dinner every night as a family. We want to raise our family together and live to old age with one another. We are committed for life. We are definitely different from a ?boyfriend/girlfriend? relationship.

After this incident, I wrote to the Troy Aquatic Center appealing for an exception, thinking perhaps it hadn't come up before. In a very respectfully-worded response, Ken Siler informed me that the board had reviewed this topic in 2010 and had opted to continue to exclude gay families from qualifying for the family pass. He went on to say that these types of matters are considered by the board in the fall, and that it wouldn't be changing in time for the summer pass. Lastly, he offered us the early bird $95 rate for a separate pass for my partner as a consolation. We appreciated Mr. Siler taking the time to respond.

Needless to say, this is very hurtful to our family, though fortunately the girls are too young to understand. I work at Hobart and they provide family medical benefits for everyone in our household after signing a simple affidavit; yet I?m unable to get a pass for the local pool? We chose to move to Troy from a smaller town in Ohio so that our children could grow up in a more diverse area. We love living here and made it our home. It?s a shame to feel like you don?t belong in your own community.

We are not boycotting the pool ? my girls love it there too much. They love seeing their friends and enjoy the water. We have been so excited to bring our baby and already have had fun talking with other new moms with little ones. Spending the extra $95 is not the issue at all ? we will do what we need to for our family. However, we are very, very disappointed in the Troy Aquatic Center for willfully choosing a policy that discriminates against our family and ask that they immediately reconsider their family pass policy to include same-sex couples living in long-term, committed relationships until marriage is an option for us.