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CIO Night 1

alitriaalitria member
in August 2012 Moms

After my co-sleeping son spent Saturday and Sunday nights trying to bounce on the bed and go sailing over me onto the floor, barely being caught both times, we decided to move up our plans to do CIO when school was out.  (My DH and I both work at public schools, last day is June 19.)

We put him in his crib at 8 last night, using the routine we usually do.  He cried until 9:35, fell asleep standing up clutching the crib rail, and woke up ten minutes later to resume screaming.  I gave up and went to bed about 10:30 so I wouldn't cave, my DH was still up and said he wasn't sure when he fell asleep which I'm pretty sure means he doesn't want me to know.

He still does one night feeding, so we did that around 2:30. I held him while he drank the bottle and got drowsy then put him back down.  He screamed for about five minutes then passed back out.  DH had to wake him up at 7:50 this morning because he was going to be late for work! 

Sunday night, he went to sleep at 9:30, woke up all night and was up for the day at 5 am and refused to nap all day yesterday. That was getting more and more normal so we knew we had to do something so DS could get some healthy sleep.

I'm torn because I feel like the meanest mom ever and listening to him scream and cry and wail makes my stomach hurt, especially since he's so dang stubborn. But the part of me that knows he's chronically sleep deprived and in danger of breaking his neck knows I have to do this now. 

Is this pretty normal? Should I expect tonight to be this bad when we put him down?  How long would you say this hours of screaming thing lasts? 

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Re: CIO Night 1

  • Ms. LisiMs. Lisi member
    Give it at least a week. By that time if nothing gets better, you know that you have given it a fair shot, and your baby has not suffered any damage.  He may have been mad as hell at you last night, but he will figure it out, I promise-babies hate change to their usual routine.  Are you doing the graduated check system?  Where you go in after graduated amounts of time? Or just full extinction? We did the graduated check system with DD and she got it on the fourth night, and just fell asleep when we put her down.  Naps are harder... took about two weeks total to get naps under control.  Consistency is key!  You can do it. 
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  • alitriaalitria member

    We're doing a graduated check system, but after the first few checks that were closer together that seemed to wind him up even more, we spread them way out.  Having us come in and not take him out of his room just seems to push him right over the edge.  The check every 20-30 minutes seems to be the spot where we are comfortable that he's ok but the frequency isn't making it worse. 

     We tried this once before at six months and he was crying like he was scared and confused.  When I picked him up he stayed hysterical and clung to me for a long time.

    Last night, he was just pi$$ed and having a tantrum.  The very instant we picked him up he'd sigh, quit crying, and once even smiled at me.  So this is much different that when he was six months old.  He's got a wicked temper so I can't say I'm too shocked.  My mom says I may have given birth to the only person on earth as stubborn as I am so at least I know I have the ability to do this, even if I don't like it because I know he's just angry he's not getting his way and not traumatized. 

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  • AprilAngieAprilAngie member
    I feel your pain! I tried yesterday with checks for almost two hours and it was brutal!!! I caved! I am CIO for same reasons you did. It's becoming too dangerous as she is too mobile. Last week I did groceries and dh left room and heard a bang and I was livid he wasn't in there as dd fell of bed. To his defence she was sleeping but I Kay beside her. After she falls asleep. It's too dangerous! I'm not chancing it again! Co sleeping is awful! At night when I wake to go to the washroom, I have to wake dh as she sees me leave and comes after me
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  • alitriaalitria member

    imageAprilAngie:
    I feel your pain! I tried yesterday with checks for almost two hours and it was brutal!!! I caved! I am CIO for same reasons you did. It's becoming too dangerous as she is too mobile. Last week I did groceries and dh left room and heard a bang and I was livid he wasn't in there as dd fell of bed. To his defence she was sleeping but I Kay beside her. After she falls asleep. It's too dangerous! I'm not chancing it again! Co sleeping is awful! At night when I wake to go to the washroom, I have to wake dh as she sees me leave and comes after me

    Yesterday he spent the day with a friend who has a baby a few months older than he is.  He was EXHAUSTED because he refused to nap all day.  We gave him his bottle, rocked him until he was falling asleep and laid him down.  He fussed for a bit but then passed out. He woke up at 1:30 for a bottle, drank it, and got drowsy. I put him back in his crib.  He cried for about five minutes but then fell asleep and was still asleep when I left at 7:15. 

    I am scared for tonight. I've heard horror stories about nights 3 and 4 and the extinction burst.  Did you make it through the first night yet? I finally got my husband to fess up and the grand total of screaming for night 1 was 3.5 hours.  I'm glad I went and hid in the bedroom. I think I would have caved too. 

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