xp DH or SO and your babies

projectbaby2012 · June 2013

DH or SO and your babies

Hi. I posted this on the multiples site and mostly got replies similar to mine. Now I'm curious to see if this is a twin/triplet thing or if it holds true for Dad's of singletons too... TIA

My boys are almost 8 months old and I just realized that DH has never left the house alone with them. He's home alone with them all of the time, but has never ventured out on his own. When they are a little older, I'm sure the 3 of them will go out and do fun things. Is this common? Am I in the minority? Should I work on him?

clrgrdfrk · June 2013

I think he took her to the store once. He may have taken her out while I was out of town for a couple days, but it was probably to a drive thru to get food.

I am pretty sure he'd have a melt down if he had to take her grocery shopping by himself.

candaceleigh21 · June 2013

I farthest he has even been alone with him is bringing him to his moms. Now, when B was a newborn and to be driven around to sleep, DH would do that but as far as bringing him somewhere just him and baby, no.

jessilynnwilliams · June 2013

He's taken her grocery shopping a few times. Although he puts her in the stroller so she goes to sleep. He usually does this when we need to tag-team our chore list, he takes her shopping so I can get some uninterrupted cleaning done!

ak111 · June 2013

DH has taken our kids to the mall, the grocery store (several times), the zoo, the playground. He is also home with them alone Wednesdays and Thursdays so if he doesn't want to be stuck in the house all day, he has to go out alone. I can't really remember but he may have been more hesitant when we had our first baby. I think when he goes out now, it's more just to get our 3 year old out of the house so they don't all kill each other.

wesleycrusher · June 2013

He's taken her he grocery store once or twice to pick up some things I forgot. He also took her out to eat once when he had a coupon for a free meal. And he'll walk her to the park and corner store in the stroller.

It's not because he's not comfortable or it's a hassle and he makes a huge deal, it's just that he has less opportunity to do it with his work schedule.

ETA: We only have one car so if he's home alone with her because I'm out, he doesn't have a way to get around.

candaceleigh21 · June 2013

mbm1983:
I have dropped him off at his brothers house with her. He pretty much took everything we own which was exhausting.My lover doesn't drive so no, when we go out we go together.and yes this is a HUGE PITA.

I find it interesting that you call him your lover.

JoNi2010 · June 2013

Nope, my DH has only taken maybe walks with him alone, and come to think of it, it was only once. Oh, wait, another time when LO was like 2-3weeks old and only he could take him to a physical therapy session (since I was working). Otherwise he has refused to take him alone - he claims that he is worried that LO will cry and not know how to comfort him. And I think DH prefers not to drag a bottle around (I nurse).

I am hoping once LO is weaned off nursing, DH will feel more comfortable, but we'll see! I know he has many plans for him and LO, but that is obviously when he is older (ie baseball games, camping, etc)

lady dixneuf · June 2013

yeah he takes him out without me all the time.

this is also his second child and he was a single dad with SD from when she was about 18 months old on.

Mrs.G123 · June 2013

Yes, to the park, store, walk etc.

AMT1107 · June 2013

DH has never taken DS by himself. About a month ago, DH took a day off of work, I called him because I realized that was the first time he was home by himself with DS. I had to walk him through making cereal. I think DS looks at DH as the "fun one". I am the one who puts DS to bed, feeds him and usually changes his diapers. DH on the other hand plays with him, reads to him and gives him snacks.

morrkim · June 2013

WanderingStars23:
My DH goes out on his own with LO, but he's also had to. When I went back to work he took a month off to stay with LO. He also has Fridays off, so he takes care of her then. If he doesn't want to stay home all day, he has to take her out alone.

same

H watches her during the day, since he works nights, while I'm at work so he has to take her if he has errands.

morrkim · June 2013

WanderingStars23:
My DH goes out on his own with LO, but he's also had to. When I went back to work he took a month off to stay with LO. He also has Fridays off, so he takes care of her then. If he doesn't want to stay home all day, he has to take her out alone.

same

H watches her during the day, since he works nights, while I'm at work so he has to take her if he has errands.

BabyCarryingVessel · June 2013

DH has never taken them anywhere alone. I have challenged him to take them to the grocery store alone just ONE time. He has not accepted the challenge yet, haha! You know what makes me mad, though?? I think people would go out of their way to hold doors and help a dad who was alone with kids. "Oh, look at that dad, he's doing it all alone, boohoo."

carrotsoup70 · June 2013

DH has NEVER taken DS out without me. I guess he never has had a reason to. He used to work 6 days a week and on his one day off he mostly does stuff around the house. Now that he is down to 5 days a week, he goes shooting on one day off (and that's no place for a baby) and still does stuff around the house on the other.

projectbaby2012 · June 2013

BabyCarryingVessel:
You know what makes me mad, though?? I think people would go out of their way to hold doors and help a dad who was alone with kids. "Oh, look at that dad, he's doing it all alone, boohoo."

So true. When we are out and dh is pushing the stroller, he gets twice the AHS and smiles from people than I ever do.

BabyCarryingVessel · June 2013

projectbaby2012:
BabyCarryingVessel:
You know what makes me mad, though?? I think people would go out of their way to hold doors and help a dad who was alone with kids. "Oh, look at that dad, he's doing it all alone, boohoo."
So true. When we are out and dh is pushing the stroller, he gets twice the AHS and smiles from people than I ever do.

Haha! Yes! I think people have more sympathy for dads. A woman is expected to do it alone and it's no biggie!

pmduggan01 · June 2013

If anything, my DH goes out with baby more than I do. I'm more of a home body, and DH gets antsy if he has to hang around the house too long. When he has DS on his own -- they're on the go.

hboo2011 · June 2013

I can't think of one place he would hve gone without me. He drops her off at his moms 2x a week when she watches her, but I don't think that counts.

He doesn't grocery shop. His closest friends don't have kids. People come to us a lot. We go out together. I don't know if it's so much that he WON'T, he just hasn't had to?

Sillygirl85 · June 2013

My husband takes LO out all the time. He has LO all to himself from 8am to 1:30pm. He takes LO grocery shopping, to the demon store, on various other errands, and to his office all the time. They also go on walks and to the playground together.

candaceleigh21 · June 2013

SarahW44:
My husband takes LO out all the time. He has LO all to himself from 8am to 1:30pm. He takes LO grocery shopping, to the demon store, on various other errands, and to his office all the time. They also go on walks and to the playground together.

NBR but WTH is a demon store?!

tevagirl · June 2013

Yes he has taken her out by himself. Not a lot, because of his work schedule. I only work part time, am with her far more. But DH has taken her to get groceries, a couple weeks ago he took her to Menards to get lawn supplies while I was at work.

wesleycrusher · June 2013

candaceleigh21:
SarahW44:
My husband takes LO out all the time. He has LO all to himself from 8am to 1:30pm. He takes LO grocery shopping, to the demon store, on various other errands, and to his office all the time. They also go on walks and to the playground together.
NBR but WTH is a demon store?!

I had the same question!

Mrs_Lady · June 2013

my husband is home with him one day during the week and they do library day on that day..he ventures out with him all the time...

initially what was funny when B was really little he didn't clean him up bathe him now he does that.

cardiganmom · June 2013

My husband has never taken O out to a store or something, but has taken her to his moms and my dads. I think I packed the diaper bag though. He still can't grasp that concept lol.

Ziegeficker · June 2013

My husband has gone out with Henry alone a few times. Usually just on walks around the neighborhood or on a quick trip to the store.

Sillygirl85 · June 2013

cerratocc:
candaceleigh21:
SarahW44:
My husband takes LO out all the time. He has LO all to himself from 8am to 1:30pm. He takes LO grocery shopping, to the demon store, on various other errands, and to his office all the time. They also go on walks and to the playground together.
NBR but WTH is a demon store?!
I had the same question!

That's what my family calls Walmart.

candaceleigh21 · June 2013

SarahW44:
cerratocc:
candaceleigh21:
SarahW44:
My husband takes LO out all the time. He has LO all to himself from 8am to 1:30pm. He takes LO grocery shopping, to the demon store, on various other errands, and to his office all the time. They also go on walks and to the playground together.

NBR but WTH is a demon store?!
I had the same question! 
That's what my family calls Walmart.

Oh ok!! Haha

Wally3 · June 2013

Yes he takes him out and had taken both boys and he takes my pink flowery diaper bag. He had less chance to do do work but doesn't avoid it. However if we divide the boys ds1 usually goes on the errand and ds2 stats at home with the other parent.

KraneRN · June 2013

Nope, DH hasn't been out with both of them unless you count driving back from my parents. When it was just DD he took her lots of places and still does. I think it's the fact that there are 2 of them makes him less enthusiastic to venture out.

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