Two Godmothers instead of 1 of each?

PGASTL · June 2013

I have been thinking about baby #2 and the fact that we will need to choose Godparents soon. I have 4 sisters and DH has a twin sister, so it's very tough.

With LO, it was easy because we were pretty much obligated to pick my oldest sister (we are Godparents to her kids) and DH's brother was a natural fit for the other slot.

Now, for this one, I was considering having my next sister and DH"s twin sister as the godparents instead of having one girl and one boy. Has anybody heard of this?

We are Methodists if that makes a difference. Yes, I know I can google but curious if anyone has seen this situation IRL and also if you think I'm an oddball for considering it!

PGASTL · June 2013

I just realized that didn't make a ton of sense - basically we would have 2 godmothers instead of a godmother and a godfather.

jnicolen1 · June 2013

i guess it matters what you expect from a godparent. if its just for spiritual guidance, then i see no problem with it. if you are looking for someone to raise your child in the event that you and your partner pass, then you'd need to designate one of them. but since the two people you chose for your first child weren't a couple, it doesn't seem any different to me.

pitterpatter129 · June 2013

I guess I don't get it. I thought godparents were both people that would be there for your kids and help raise them with religious beliefs, but also people who would assume custody if something were to happen to you. So, I thought you pick a married couple who they could live with if you die... But, we are Baptists/ slightly agnostics who don't have this tradition, so I'm not in the loop!! I'm sure if you wanted two aunts, it would be fine.

SugarSnap83 · June 2013

pitterpatter129:
I guess I don't get it. I thought godparents were both people that would be there for your kids and help raise them with religious beliefs, but also people who would assume custody if something were to happen to you. So, I thought you pick a married couple who they could live with if you die... But, we are Baptists/ slightly agnostics who don't have this tradition, so I'm not in the loop!! I'm sure if you wanted two aunts, it would be fine.
I think that was the traditional way, but that things have changed slightly. Personally, I still think godparents should be there for spiritual guidance, but if you have multiple kids each with a different godparent and you die, would all 3 kids go to a different couple? We choose Noah's godparents, but a different couple to be his guardian if something would ever happen to us.
As for PGASTL's question, I think godparents can be whomever you want them to be!

stephy1221 · June 2013

We did this for DD. It was the only way I could pick two people who I knew would be strong positive role models for life and that the church would accept (Catholic churches can be tough). All in all it was a bit unconventional but I love that DD has these two strong women in her corner.

As far as the other posters questions about guardianship, appointing a guardian in case of your death in a will is not the same as appointing godparents. Godparent is a spiritual title, guardianship is a legal one but I think so many people use (or used to use) the same people for each that it has become a common misconception.

danigirl7181 · June 2013

DH has two godmothers and no godfather.

danigirl7181 · June 2013

pitterpatter129:
I guess I don't get it. I thought godparents were both people that would be there for your kids and help raise them with religious beliefs, but also people who would assume custody if something were to happen to you. So, I thought you pick a married couple who they could live with if you die... But, we are Baptists/ slightly agnostics who don't have this tradition, so I'm not in the loop!! I'm sure if you wanted two aunts, it would be fine.

Lily's Godparents are not her legal guardian if something were to happen to us.

xxbabycakesxx · June 2013

I would go for the 2 godmothers if thats what you want. Does your church have an issue with it?

keags5496 · June 2013

We actually call them sponsors in my church so that people feel a bit more freedom to choose the role models that they think fit best. Go with two godmothers if that's what works for you!

ChicagoBroad26 · June 2013

danigirl7181:
pitterpatter129:
I guess I don't get it.   I thought godparents were both people that would be there for your kids and help raise them with religious beliefs, but also people who would assume custody if something were to happen to you.  So, I thought you pick a married couple who they could live with if you die...  But, we are Baptists/ slightly agnostics who don't have this tradition, so I'm not in the loop!!   I'm sure if you wanted two aunts, it would be fine.
 
Lily's Godparents are not her legal guardian if something were to happen to us. 
 
 

Same. Ava and Mila's godparents would not be their legal guardians. My parents would have them if something happened to us.

missmuffin87 · June 2013

I think it sounds like a great idea. If it just so happens that the 2 people you want to choose are both women, just go for it.

PGASTL · June 2013

Thanks so much, everyone!! I did a bit of googling too and it looks like there won't be an issue with this at all, which is great! We just recently switched churches and haven't actually officially joined yet, so that's why I didn't call up there and ask.

Thanks again!

lrn327 · June 2013

As a fellow Methodist, I don't think that's an issue at all! In fact, during baptism, it probably won't even come up unless the minister asks if there are any Godparents who want to stand for the ceremony. We're definitely practicing Methodists, but C does not have Godparents because we didn't feel we had any supergreat choices at the moment. He does have designated guardians (ILs) and financial guardians (my dad and stepmom). If you do want either of those women to be designated as LO2's guardian, you'd want to do so officially in your will since likely a judge would only "consider" the chosen Godparents among the other viable options if you don't specially designate.

PGASTL · June 2013

lrn327:
As a fellow Methodist, I don't think that's an issue at all! In fact, during baptism, it probably won't even come up unless the minister asks if there are any Godparents who want to stand for the ceremony. We're definitely practicing Methodists, but C does not have Godparents because we didn't feel we had any supergreat choices at the moment. He does have designated guardians (ILs) and financial guardians (my dad and stepmom). If you do want either of those women to be designated as LO2's guardian, you'd want to do so officially in your will since likely a judge would only "consider" the chosen Godparents among the other viable options if you don't specially designate.

Thanks!

We do have a will noting the legal guardians but I need to check and be sure we don't need to update it with the 2nd child. I think we put "any future children" in there but I better check!

mommyfied · June 2013

We had one Godmother, one Godfather and two uhhh.. don't know the word for it.. "guardians" maybe?

They have no legal responsibility if we pass away, here, but they are responsible for the spiritual guidance (however, this is extremly lacking in our family, so I would not have high hopes about that :P )

Could you just have guardians?

Strunella · June 2013

Our church gives us the "option" of having godparents, but since it was really slim pickings for us, we opted not to have any. I think it's perfectly fine to have 2 godmothers.

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