Hygiene

Re: Hygiene

• mommyof4boys member

  June 2013

  -auntie-:

  This is a popular topic on my forums. 

  It would be useful to know why this is a problem. Is it new since you handed over responsibility for self care? Does he have underlying sensory issues that make him avoid soap and water? Are his fine motor skills so delayed that he can't physically manage the process? Does he get distracted and forget what he's supposed to be doing in there?

  A lot of kids- even NT ones- go through a lazy, haphazard grooming phase somewhere aroung 8-10.

  Some strategies to help-

  1. Make sure he understands the social implications of being a dirtball- the old MGW mantra about having ownership of what others think of him based on  his actions.

  2. Look for ways to desensitize him to the process. Allow him to use his choice of scented soap and shampoo. Allow him to pick a bath over a shower if necessary.

  3. Watch to be sure he's changing clothes- so sensory types prefer "broken in" clothes that have been previously worn.

  4. Wet wipes to supplement TP.

  5. Consider a laminated checklist of everything you need him to do vis a vis self care posted in the bathroom. 

  6. The do over. If DS emerged from the bath still dirty/stinky he got redirected to try again.  If the soap was untouched, he got sent back in.

   

  It's a phase that passes pretty quickly for most. 

  It's him not paying attention, at least I'm assuming because he's been ok up until recently.  I stopped helping him about September (on his request).  It's gotten worse in the last 2-3 weeks.

  I've talked to him about "being the stinky kid", told him I'd wipe his butt if he couldn't do it properly, etc.  We have toddler wipes because that's what Chris likes.  

  He picked the shampoo and I stocked up on it.  He likes Garnier  His soap has to be either a dye/perfume free or an oatmeal dependent on how his skin is doing since he has excema.  

  I send Matthew back in the shower if he's not done well with his hair.  Quite honestly, it's his behind that is offensive right now.  We'be been finding skid marks in his underwear.  I've been keeping track of when he goes to make sure he's not backsliding with the encopresis; he's going daily right now.

  Looks like I'm making a reminder for him in the bathroom... 

   

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• mommyof4boys member

  June 2013

  He tends to go right after he comes home from school.

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• hopanka member

  June 2013

  Wanted to add that my 8 year old has a problem with wiping, too. Even with wet wipes. I got grossed out and now I check and wipe it myself. Yeah, he doesnt like it and I dont either, but it is honestly preferable to me that chaps and dirty clothes. His problem is fine motor, I have watched him. He does it, but doesnt do it properly. Part of it may be sensory, je is scared he is gonna dirty his hand. I have not found another solution to date, so Im all ears as well.

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• mommyof4boys member

  June 2013

  -auntie-:

  This a skill that seems to fall one of two ways. Back when clinicians had the choice between Aspergers and PDD-Nos/HFA, adaptive skills like butt wiping are the kind of things that differentiated- most docs would give an autism/PDD-Nos if there were adaptive or self care delays.

  Fine motor skills play into it a bit as they do tooth brushing, but like oral hygiene there can be a sensory OCD-like piece. To be far, some kids who don't wipe well are also the kids who come home from school wearing remnents of their lunch on their cheeks. Other kids on "team hashmark" are so grossed out by the thought of poop on their hands that they don't do an adequate job- some refuse to even try. Not sure why wearing it caked on their butts doesn't have the same reaction, but it seldom does. I've known a few moms who were successful in getting their child to use disposal vinyl/latex gloves to get past that. 

  The others channel their OCD into removing every molecule of the offending substance. If I go into your house and you have a Toto or  American Standard 4' trap toilet and a kid on spectrum, I'm guessing you buy your TP at Sam's Club and have a plumber on speed dial. By the time DS was 8, he had and could use his very own plumbing snake.

  This is one of those situations where a "later" dx tends to result in more pragmatic approach on the part of the parents in terms of insisting on a developmentally typical level of participation. 

  i have to laugh because we do buy to at Costco AND we do unclog it every time he goes.   

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